Rent-A-Vampire
by moosals
Summary: In a world where it has become the norm to date a supernatural being, no self-respecting woman would turn up at a party without one, would she?
1. Trick or Treat?

**Disclaimer:** Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all its characters. No copyright infringement is intended.

 **Author's Note:** Decision-making is hard enough for me without being limited to only two genre categories. I've checked the humour box, but that does not guarantee laughter every chapter, if at all! Sometimes we have to find the funny side of life or else we'd cry.

* * *

 **1\. Trick or Treat?**

"I'd like to rent a vampire."

"For how long?" she asked.

"Just for Halloween – for a party."

She slid a photo across the desk. "This is the only one we have available. Minimum rental: six weeks."

"But I only need him for one night. Not even the night – just the hours it will take to get through the party."

She examined her painted fingernails. "Well, you could try Rent-A-Werewolf a few blocks over. They might have something available."

"No thanks. I've used them before, several times in fact, but they were all dogs." I studied the photo some more. "Why does he look so miserable?"

"He's a reluctant signing."

"What about the vampires in your brochure?" I said, pulling the well-thumbed booklet out of my purse. I laid it on the desk between us, opened it to the first page and smoothed out the creases.

"Oh now, look!" I said, pointing at the first photo. "He's really nice. He's big and strong, and he has a winning smile. Just look at those dimples."

"I'm afraid he's no longer available. The last client that hired him… well, let's just say she paid a lot of money to release him from his contract with us."

"How much money?"

"She bought half the business."

"And him?" I said, turning the page. "He is gorgeous and he has the whole suave, sophisticated, older man thing down to a tee. I bet he knows his way around–"

"That's my dad. He's only twenty-three and he's a married vampire. He was just doing me a favour."

"What about him? Those scars on his forearms and neck make him look dangerous but oh so sexy."

"He's mine," she said, dragging out each word in such a way as to brook no argument. "He came to sign up on the day of the photo shoot but it wasn't meant to be."

"What wasn't?"

"This particular career path."

"You ate him?"

A smile slowly crept across her face. "In a manner of speaking and then he asked me to marry him. Begged in fact. I said yes."

"So, none of the vampires in this brochure are available for hire," I said. She shook her head. "You do realise that I could report you to The Federal Trade Commission for false advertising?"

"But you won't because I'm about to offer you a big discount."

"How can you run a business with only one vampire available for hire?"

"It's in the name: Rent-A-Vampire. Singular."

"You're having me on now."

"Okay, I am, but unfortunately we really are fully booked at present – all bar this one."

I conceded defeat. "Alright."

"You'll take him?" She seemed surprised.

"It appears I have no other choice."

"Let me show you our Terms and Conditions." She opened a drawer, pulled out a sheet of paper and pushed it across the desk toward me.

I was no fool. I read every single word. "I have to house him?"

"Yes. It's a full immersion vampire experience. We don't do things by halves here."

"And I have to feed him?"

"Just once every three days. He's very neat. He'll only leave two tiny holes and, let's face it, no one is anyone these days without a bite mark on their neck."

"That's what the werewolves said."

She frowned. "They said that?"

"Well, not exactly," I said, wrinkling my nose. "Their terms include a clause whereby if you opt to have sex with your werewolf escort, they are at liberty to bite the back of your neck."

"That's disgusting! That's like embroidering your logo on the outside of a piece of clothing or embossing it into the leather of an expensive pair of shoes."

"Says the woman who has just told me vampire bites are the very height of fashion."

"Vampire bites are discreet and fade with time. Until then, they can be easily covered up by makeup or a scarf if required. A full wolf bite means a lifetime of polo necks." She closed her eyes and shuddered.

"So," I said, looking back down at the paperwork, "I house him and feed him every three days… What's this clause here at the end?"

Her lips pulled back into a wide grin, displaying a perfect set of glistening, white teeth. "Accidents happen."


	2. Antedates

**2\. Antedates**

The whole thing had started back in high school with Angela and her obsessive love of the supernatural. She'd dragged me to the movie theatre, made me watch box sets of DVDs and coerced me into reading book after book from the library.

For the daughter of a man of the cloth, she sure was fascinated by ungodly creatures and yet, despite her efforts, the entire genre just left me cold. I could not invest in something that wasn't true to life. Vampires, werewolves and ghosts were mere creatures of fantasy and fairy tale, no more real than love at first sight or the handsome prince riding in to save the helpless girl from her wicked stepmother.

During our graduation year, everything we thought we knew was turned on its head. Like the rest of the world, we'd assumed that supernatural roles in movies and television series were played by actors, their actions enhanced by special effects and makeup. Seemingly, we were wrong.

With the advent of increased social tolerance, the supernatural creatures that had been secretly living among us slowly outed themselves to the world, and suddenly Hollywood A-listers lost top billing if they hadn't been seen to be dating a ghost at the very least.

At university I managed to steer clear of it all. I blocked the news and gossip pages on my web browser, stayed off social media and avoided all social interaction on campus. I refused point blank to date, no matter how hard Angela tried to persuade me.

I earned the highest honours for my English degree, getting a good few pieces of creative writing published in some niche magazines in my final year, but by the time I was ready to launch myself on the world as a fledgling author, no publishing house would even look at me unless I adopted a supernatural theme. My writing was gritty, depicting human life at its best and worst, but it wasn't going to sell.

Angela said I needed to change my game, step out into the real world, let go of my prejudices and get to know someone not quite so human.

She introduced me to one of her supernatural friends. Jacob was cute, I suppose, in a boy-next-door kind of way, but he had a tendency to drool whenever he looked at me and, on occasion, I would catch him gawping with his tongue hanging out – literally.

Jacob was a werewolf, or so he said. He worked at an alternative escort agency but, frankly, I couldn't see how he could be making any kind of a living at it.

He inveigled his way into my life, constantly turning up on my doorstep like a persistent puppy dog with a boner. He seemed to always know when I was cooking, almost as if he could smell it a mile off, and his appetite was huge.

My lasagne, which should have been carved up into six portions and frozen to make six dinners for me, only fed two. My chilli and cornbread, which had always lasted me several meals, fed two. And my easy-to-freeze, nine-inch diameter, triple chocolate cheesecake with whipped cream… well, I was lucky to get a small slice and even then I had to guard my plate while eating it.

When Angela invited me to her first Halloween party in her new apartment, she was most insistent that I make an effort to turn up with a supernatural date. She probably expected me to bring Jacob, who was indeed quick to offer his services free of charge, but there was no way I was giving the boy false hope. He'd be there regardless, so on a day when I knew he was busy elsewhere, I visited his place of work, fully intending to book one of his co-workers.

When I entered the premises, all eyes turned my way and I soon found myself surrounded. The escorts were a flirtatious bunch, each and every one of them tall and muscular with cropped, black hair and red-brown skin, each keen to point out their personal profile in the brochure.

Every photo showed them topless and barefoot in old cut-off jeans, like it was some kind of uniform they had to wear. Beside each photo was a picture of a wolf and I'd have to say the marketing was spot on. The wolves appeared well matched to the expressions on each of the men's faces.

Sam, the owner, was a good looking guy but his details clearly stated that he was engaged to his business partner, Emily, so I doubted he was available for the likes of me.

Looking around the room, I found myself drawn to one man in particular. He stood apart from the rest with a sardonic sneer on his face, but something in his eyes said he was completely comfortable in his own skin and knew exactly how attractive he was to women. I couldn't help thinking he would be one to expect more from his client than a simple thank you and goodnight at the end of a date, and I wasn't looking for that.

After some discussion with Emily, and a thorough read through of the small print, I booked the man with the sweetest smile and arranged for him to meet me at a bar a block away from Angela's apartment.

My date, Embry, arrived on time with a friend in tow. It was a pack thing apparently; he and Quil came as a pair. I made a mental note to check my bank balance when I got home to ensure the agency hadn't billed me twice.

Embry was as sweet as I'd expected. He'd put on a white shirt for the occasion – and proper jeans – but he offered to go and change if I wanted a more authentic look, whatever that meant. I looked at his friend, who was wearing the agency uniform of old cut-off jeans, and shook my head.

I asked Quil if he wasn't cold. He grabbed my hand and placed it in the centre of his bare chest, asking if he felt cold to me. He was burning up and I told him so, suggesting he go back home to bed. Embry just laughed, took my hand from Quil's and led me down the street.

When we arrived at the party, I noticed a lot of the guests appeared to have come alone. I questioned Angela about it and she explained that those guests were accompanied by ghosts. I didn't believe a word of it but I did kick myself for not having thought of the same ploy.

The party was pleasant enough. Embry and Quil danced a little too close for comfort, so much so that I worried I would catch whatever virus Quil was harbouring, but at some point I began to feel like a gooseberry squashed in between them. I excused myself, called a taxi and headed home.

Jacob later told me that werewolves really do run hotter than humans. I wondered what exactly they could be taking to keep their body temperatures permanently elevated.

…

By the time Christmas had come around, I'd had dinner dates with three other werewolves and countless unplanned dinner dates at home with my persistent puppy.

One of my escorts was young enough to be my son and a little too confident in his public displays of unwanted affection. One turned out to be a girl and a rather handsy one at that. The third left me mid-meal, having hitherto rubbed his feet in places where feet shouldn't go under a restaurant table, because he'd clapped eyes on a girl across the room that he used to sit next to at school. For some reason, he could no longer look elsewhere.

Needless to say, I got a full refund on all three.

For Christmas, Angela gave me two tickets to a New Year's fancy dress party at a hotel downtown. She told me to bring a werewolf and then handed me a large gift. It was soft and squidgy and very well wrapped. I took my time to undo the ribbon and slowly peeled back the paper, being careful not to get a paper cut. Out spilled a bright red, velvet cloak with a large hood – a very festive choice that would keep me nice and warm all winter.

Aside from Sam and Jacob, there was only one wolf left for me to hire for the party and, fortunately or not, he was available.

From the moment I met Paul in the lobby of the hotel, he was positively predatory. I couldn't leave his side without his beady eyes following me around the room and when I eventually escaped to the restroom, he followed behind me, slipping inside the stall before I could shut the door.

His hands were everywhere – inside my top and under my skirt – but when one hand dove inside my panties, I had to call a halt. I'd gone to the restroom for good reason and I wasn't about to do it all over his hand.

My plain spoken words had the opposite effect to what I'd imagined. The look on his face was one of pure, unadulterated lust. He mumbled something about me being able to mark him as mine another time then and left the stall.

While I was washing my hands, he came up behind me and pressed his groin firmly into my rear. There was no mistaking the size of his offering. Tempting as it was, the yellow colour of his eyes reflected in the mirror brought me back to my senses. I recalled that one clause in the Terms and Conditions of Hire, and there was no way I was letting that happen. It was time I went home.

When he dropped me back at my apartment, he apologised for his behaviour, explaining that with a full moon imminent, it was very difficult to control himself and his more animalistic urges. I got out of the taxi and looked up at the clear night sky. I knew a new moon when I saw one.

When Jacob dropped by unannounced for pancakes the next morning, he told me that the full moon thing was a load of nonsense anyway. He said he'd prove it to me by changing into a giant wolf in my landlady's backyard, under the full glare of the midday sun.

Midday sun was a little far fetched and so was the giant wolf story. I think he was hoping that seeing him in the buff would finally peak my interest. It didn't. I closed my eyes before his pants were even undone and shoved my hands firmly into my jacket pockets.

Next thing I knew, I was feeling his cold nose on my cheek and his hot breath on my neck. I screwed my face up in disgust and heard him make a noise that was not dissimilar to a dog whimpering.

I emitted a growl of my own and told him if he so much as licked my face or humped my leg, he'd be rendered incapable of producing puppies. I said that he'd better be dressed by the time I'd counted to ten or I was never feeding him again, and if he ever wanted a girl to be intimate with him, he'd better do something about the dog breath.

The hangdog expression that met me when I opened my eyes wore me down a little. I made him a coffee and cut him a large slab of my homemade chocolate cake. I explained that I really wasn't interested in being more than friends and suggested he try asking Angela out instead.

That was the end of it for me. No more make-believe, no more supernatural and certainly no more dates.

After Jacob had left with the remains of the chocolate cake wrapped in tin foil, I spotted a cream envelope on my doormat. The handwriting on it looked suspiciously like Angela's. I peeled back the flap, eased out the thick piece of embossed card and groaned.

It was an invitation for two to a Halloween party – an underground tour of the city, supernatural date obligatory.

As far as I was concerned, Angela had just put herself in the doghouse with Jacob.

* * *

 **Note:** to play, feel like or be a gooseberry is the British equivalent of being the fifth wheel (or third wheel) - the person that tags along with a couple on a date or, in older times, the chaperone.

 **A word about updates:** My time is not my own until September. Updates may be sporadic until then but rest assured, this story is written in its entirety on my iPad.


	3. Threshold

**3\. Threshold**

I left it as long as I possibly could.

For the best part of eight and a half months, I hid in the store where I worked and in my apartment where I continued to write stories no one would ever read.

I managed to get through my birthday with the minimum of fuss, just me and Angela (and a chocolate cake), watching a movie of her choice because my choices were all human and therefore not acceptable.

But Halloween was fast approaching and I had done nothing to secure a date for the party. If I didn't hurry up and secure one myself, Angela would surely do it for me. She wasn't dating Jacob so I couldn't take any chances.

Then, just over six weeks short of the dreaded day, I found a brochure in my mailbox. The paper was glossy and thick, the photography classy and the men pictured drop dead gorgeous, even if they were all wearing makeup. No man has skin that pale, lashes that long or lips that full and red.

I wasn't prone to flights of fantasy but looking at those three, I could be tempted. I fanned the brochure in front of my flushed cheeks. What was I thinking? I couldn't possibly hope to attract that kind of a man... but I could pay to have a date with one of them.

For a couple of days, I left the brochure on my kitchen table, eyeing it warily whenever I ate breakfast or dinner. At times I found myself staring at one of the men, drifting off into a world of–

No! It would not do.

But if men like that chose to dress up and pretend to be vampires, I would hire one of them for Angela's party. So long as she was convinced, what did it matter?

…

The storefront was understated. Olive green painted wood surrounded the sparkling windowpanes and an arc of gold lettering stencilled across the glass formed the simplest of signs: Rent-A-Vampire.

Looking in, I could see a woman sitting at an antique desk, working at her computer, her red eyes focussed on the screen. It was amazing what one could do with contact lenses.

My movement toward the door must have caught her attention because her head whipped around, and those red eyes were suddenly focussed on me. Her lips curled up into a smile as she beckoned me in and pointed to the upholstered chair in front of her desk.

"What can I do for you?" she asked.

…

My vampire rental arrived on my doorstep at twilight on what had been an unusually sunny day for September.

I opened my door and stared at the man whose only resemblance to his photograph was the uncomfortable expression on his face. It was as if he could smell something particularly unpleasant, such as dog excrement.

His eyes were shut tight so I had a quick sniff at my clothes. Not detecting anything untoward, I regarded the vision of beauty in front of me.

His long, bronze hair was in complete disarray, the very tips catching the last rays of the setting sun and forming a halo atop his head. His pale skin was flawless and smooth, his lips red and full – even though they were currently pressed firmly together – and his lashes were long enough to make girls the world over green with envy. He was obviously adept at applying his makeup, for I couldn't tell where he'd used it and where he hadn't.

He took a deep breath in, sighed and opened his blood red eyes. "Miss Bella Swan?"

His voice was deep and soft, and it wrapped around my name, enveloping it just like the red velvet of my cloak did my body on chilly evenings.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?" he asked.

I shook my head and came back to my senses. "Of course," I said, realising my error and moving to one side. I waved an arm in front of my body. "Do come in."

He glided past me, mumbling something about humans having no sense of self-preservation, and placed his holdall on the floor beside the sofa. He turned and looked around my apartment.

"You only have the one room," he said.

"Yes. Well, this and a bathroom."

"Where is your bed?"

"The sofa pulls out."

"Oh."

"Oh? Oh no! I didn't think about where you would sleep."

"I won't be needing a bed."

"Of course you won't. Perhaps you'd like to hang upside down from one of the joists, or I could empty my blanket chest if you like. It's quite long. If you bend your knees, you might just fit."

"You really have no idea, do you?"

"Not really, no."

"I don't sleep hanging upside down. Nor do I sleep in a coffin. Vampires don't sleep at all."

"You keep going all night?"

He raised an eyebrow. "We have been known to, yes."

I didn't know whether to laugh or blush. I did the latter. "So, what will you do while I'm sleeping?"

"Watch you."

"No! No way! That's creepy."

"I'm a vampire. It's my job to be creepy."

"Please tell me you don't mean that."

"Isn't that why you hired me?"

I didn't want to admit to anything with regard that situation so I said the first thing that came into my mind.

"How old are you?" I clapped my hand over my mouth.

"One hundred and eleven."

I laughed at the absurdity of his answer but I could play along. "You've aged well."

"It's all in the diet."

"How old are you really?"

"Would you be happier if I said I was seventeen?"

"No!"

"And why would that be, Miss Swan? What exactly are your intentions?"

"I… I…" I was flustered and had no clue what I would do with him for the next six hours, let alone the next six weeks. I needed some space. "Let me show you the bathroom so you can freshen up."

I led him back the way we'd come, standing to one side to allow him into the tiny room near the front door.

"How am I supposed to shower in there?" he asked.

"I manage."

"You're not six foot two."

"The two is important?"

"Every inch counts. How tall are you? Five foot three?"

"Five foot four," I said, pulling in my stomach and standing up straighter.

He raised his eyebrows, pulled open the shower door and stepped into the cubicle. He had to stoop to fit.

"This is the problem with converted lofts," he said. "Sloping ceilings."

"You could always shower on your knees," I said, thinking he'd be about my height if he did that.

I turned to leave the room and noticed his scowling reflection in the mirror above the sink. Vampire, my foot! He muttered something about knees and not showering alone, and then followed me out.

"I'm sorry? What did you say?"

"I apologise for my rudeness," he said, unbuttoning his coat. "My name is Edward Cullen. Thank you, Bella, for welcoming me into your home."

I took his coat from him and hung it up on the hook on the back of the closet door. He fetched his holdall and I helped him unpack his things.

For a six week stay, he had very little in the way of clothing. I cleared a shelf for him to stow his T-shirts and his one pair of jeans, hung his pants and button-down shirts on the rail beside my own clothes and then pulled open an empty drawer. He placed his socks in it and slid it home. I looked at the bag in his hand and then up at him expectantly.

"What?" he asked, holding up his toiletry bag.

"What else do you have in your holdall?" It didn't feel right to point out the glaring wardrobe omission. Just thinking about it had me a little flushed.

"Some notebooks, a pen and a bottle of ink," he replied.

"What will you do for six weeks?"

"Read. Write. Be with you. Feed."

My stomach rumbled and he smiled.

"Sandwiches okay for you?" I asked.

"I ate before I came," he said.

I made my way over to the kitchen area and set about making myself a grilled cheese sandwich. He stood in front of my bookcase, pulling the odd book out and flipping through it before returning it to the shelf.

"What do you do?" he asked. "Your job, I mean."

"I work in a bookstore in town," I replied, placing my sandwich on the hot griddle.

"You have quite a collection here at home."

"I love books," I said. "You can read whatever you like, just don't bend back the spines or turn down the corners."

He smiled at me, selected a book and went to sit on the sofa. His knees knocked against the old, wooden blanket chest that served as a coffee table by day.

I ate my sandwich at the kitchen table and then cleared up my mess. It was getting late and I'd need to get to bed soon. I grabbed my red plaid pyjamas from the blanket chest and headed for the bathroom.

When I came out, the curtains had been drawn and the kitchen blind pulled down. The blanket chest had been moved to one side and the sofabed pulled out and made up perfectly with my bedding. Edward was sitting on a kitchen chair, reading.

"You didn't have to do that," I said, "but thank you, all the same."

He nodded but didn't raise his head. I turned on the lamp on the side table and switched off the main lights. He'd said he wouldn't sleep, but I knew that couldn't really be true. I began to worry about what he might do once I'd nodded off.

What had possessed me to agree to this arrangement _and_ pay for the privilege?

"Bella," he said softly, drawing me out of my thoughts. "Would you like me to leave?"

"Where would you go?"

He shrugged. "Out."

"You'd catch your death outside at this time of year." He shook his head and I sighed. "I signed a piece of paper agreeing to house you for six weeks."

"You knew nothing about me. Why would you do that?"

"I don't know."

"I'll sit in the closet. How's that?"

Before I could argue with him, he'd picked up the book he was reading and shut himself away out of sight. I climbed into bed, turned off the lamp and started to giggle.

"What's funny?" His voice was muffled behind the door.

"You – in the closet."

"I was in the closet for almost a century. What's one more night?"

I got back out of bed and opened the closet door. He was sitting on the floor in the dark with his arms around his legs, holding the book open in front of him.

"That can't be comfortable and there is no way you can read in here without a flashlight," I said.

He smiled up at me. "I can see as well in the dark as I can in daylight."

"Don't be ridiculous. Come out. There's a spare blanket on the back of the sofabed. You can lay beside me on top of the covers."

His smile widened, showing off his pearly white teeth. He stood and followed me to the bed, tucking me in before sitting down beside me with his legs outstretched, the spare blanket draped over the top of them.

I lay there for a while but my mind refused to quieten down. "I can't sleep now."

"Would you like me to read to you?"

"That would be nice."

"The sun did not shine, it was too wet to play, so we sat in the house all that cold, cold wet day."

I opened one eye. The silly man was smiling to himself. "Edward, I do not own The Cat in the Hat."

"It was worth a try." He cleared his throat and began again. "All children, except one, grow up."

This time I opened both eyes and glared at him. "Well, he'd better grow up pretty damn quick. Besides, even in the dark, I can make out the front cover. I know exactly what book you're not reading from."

He laid the book in his lap. "Perhaps I should sing you to sleep."

…

I woke in the night to see Edward's pale face in front of mine, his eyes wide open, staring right at me. I blinked a few times, expecting my mind to be playing tricks on me, but disappear he did not.

"Can't sleep?" I whispered.

"No." His breath was cool and sweet across my face

"I always have problems sleeping on my first night in a new place. Are you cold?" I reached out tentatively to touch his cheek. It was like ice. "You're freezing. Come on. Get under the covers."

He stared at me intently and I stared back, daring him to make a move. Slowly, he raised himself up enough to pull the covers out from underneath him. I felt the chill emanating from his body as soon as he'd covered himself over.

"You can come a little closer, Edward. I won't bite." I put my hand on his face again, stroking his cheek. "Close your eyes," I whispered, and he did just that.

I ran my fingers over his neck and up through his silky hair to massage his head. He made a low humming sound, not dissimilar to a cat purring. I found myself getting drowsy and my arm getting heavy.

"You know, you really ought to get yourself some pyjamas," I muttered before falling into a deep slumber.

…

Breakfast was on the table when I next opened my eyes – hot, buttered toast and scrambled eggs, and a glass of orange juice – and Edward was standing by the coffee maker, spooning in the ground coffee.

"Thank you," I said, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

He looked me up and down and said, "All part of the service."

My red plaid pyjamas weren't the most fetching articles of nightwear I owned, but the way he looked at me made me feel beautiful. Then again, he was looking at me through red tinted contact lenses.

"Have you eaten?" I asked, taking my seat at the table.

"I don't eat. Not your kind of food anyway."

"Ah. Yes. When am I supposed to feed you?"

"Sunday."

"Morning or evening?"

"Early evening is best. You'll need to rest afterward."

"Huh."

In the silence that ensued between us, I was very aware of every noise I made, be it chewing, slurping or scraping my silverware on the china plate. I was grateful when Edward began to hum.

He placed a cup of black coffee in front of me and sat on the other chair.

"What will you do today?" I asked, wrapping my hands around the cup.

"Go wherever you go."

"I don't think so. I have to go to work."


	4. Shadow

**4\. Shadow**

Mike Newton had an uncanny knack of turning up where he wasn't wanted.

I'd left Forks with Angela for the University of Washington only to find that Mike was there too, studying business. Four and a half years later, failing to earn enough from my writing, I left Seattle for a cheaper apartment in Port Angeles and got a job in a used bookstore bang-smack next to the newest branch of Olympic Outfitters, managed by none other than you know who.

Mike had the kind of persistent streak that put Jacob's to shame. We had worked together at his parents' original sporting goods store during high school and away from the crowd, he was a nice guy – funny, sweet-natured and willing to turn a blind eye whenever I knocked something over. Any other boy would have bent over laughing and then spread the joke around school, but Mike kept a straight face and helped me put everything back in place, time and again, without so much as a snicker.

He pushed and prodded and cajoled until I finally agreed to go on a date with him to the movie theatre. More dates followed and then he pushed and prodded his way into my pants. It wasn't momentous. He didn't light up my world but he did leave the soiled condom on the floor of my truck, earning me a grounding and him a gun pointed at his crotch when my dad next laid eyes on him.

We carried on seeing each other and we carried on doing things, with a little more discretion and increasingly promising results. But then he went and spoiled it all.

Since then, and the whole 'supernatural creatures walk among us' thing, I'd pretty much kept myself to myself. Except at work, where Mike would pop in every day when the clock struck twelve to ask me out.

I was stronger than I had been at eighteen. Years of practice turning down dates does wonders for a girl's resolve.

…

Edward had eventually agreed to stay at my apartment while I went to work. The sun had come out after breakfast so that had probably clinched it for him. Feigning burning to a crisp at that stage of the agreement would have been a trifle inconvenient.

Two customers came into the bookstore within minutes of me unlocking the front door. When I saw the second one out at around eleven o'clock, the clouds had all but covered the sun. I made myself a mug of coffee and sat down to work at the desk toward the back of the store, listening to the old clock on the wall beside me ticking away the hour.

At midday on the dot, the bell above the door clanged. I looked up from the computer screen and watched Mike stride in, intent on performing his daily ritual.

"May I take you out to lunch, Bella?" he asked. It was the same question every day.

"Not today, thank you, Mike." Or any other day.

"Why won't you give me another chance?"

"You know very well why." I picked up a book from the pile on my right and typed its particulars into the search engine to gauge what price we should be selling it for. I marked it up with my pencil and added it to our online catalogue before moving on to the next one.

At seven minutes past twelve, the bell clanged again and a tall, bronze-haired man strolled into the bookstore, holding a brown paper bag in one hand and a small flask in the other. Mike turned to watch him approach my desk.

"I brought you some lunch, Bella," Edward said, holding out the paper bag.

I took it from him, unfolded the top and breathed in the heavenly scent of grilled cheese. "Mmm. Did you make this yourself?"

"I watched how you made it last night."

"What's in the flask?"

"Tomato soup," he said, placing the flask on the desk. "I found a can in your cabinet. I saved the other half for tomorrow."

"You're an angel." I smiled up at him.

He turned his face away. "Hardly," he said, and then he wandered off into the maze of bookcases. Mike stared after him.

I cleared a space on the desk, opened the flask and poured some hot soup into the small cup. I tore open the brown paper bag, picked up one half of the sandwich and, after dipping it into the soup, took a large bite.

Mike was now looking at me with his brows knitted together. "You do realise he's a–"

"Friend," I said, speaking with my mouth full. I chewed and swallowed. "Same time tomorrow?"

He turned reluctantly toward the door and stomped out of the store into the chilly September air.

Edward stayed for the afternoon but did nothing to interrupt my work or get in the way of any customers. At closing time, I found him in the one section I least liked to frequent.

"I can't believe the nonsense printed in some of these books," Edward said, turning to me. "They have no idea what lies and misguided myths they are perpetuating."

"Well, that's something we can agree upon," I said. "Time to go home."

As I switched off the lights, I caught a glimpse of a face moving away from the windowpane into the darkness.

The light from the lamp across the street was barely bright enough for me to see to lock up, but I was used to that. Edward was frowning when I turned to lead the way down the dark side alley to the parking lot. He muttered something under his breath and then groaned when he saw my red truck. He grumbled as I drove the short distance home and then, as he got out of the truck, his face took on an expression of complete and utter revulsion.

"Does the person downstairs own a dog?" he asked.

"My landlady? No, I don't think so."

As we ascended the stairs to the upper floor of the house, the security light came on automatically.

"Finally," he muttered.

"Huh?" I opened the front door, switched on the lights and walked over to the sofa to dump my purse and cloak.

That evening followed a similar pattern to the previous one but without the introductions and the tour of my apartment. I reheated a portion of frozen lasagne while Edward sat at the kitchen table, reading.

When I went to wash and change, Edward made up my bed and lay down on top of the covers, fully dressed under his blanket.

Before I switched off the lamp, I looked up at his face concentrating on the book in his hand. The red of his contact lenses seemed a little darker than it had been the night before.

"You might want to get under the covers now, Edward," I said, "so you don't wake me up in the middle of the night."

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye, put his book down on the arm of the sofabed and fidgeted around until he was lying on his back between the sheets.

He rolled his head to one side and winked at me. "No funny business," he said. I giggled and reached out to turn off the lamp.

I closed my eyes and lay still, trying to even out my breathing so it would appear that I had gone to sleep. After twenty breaths, I opened one eye to peek at Edward. He was holding the book in front of his face again, pretending to read. I had to applaud him for effort.

…

When Mike came into the store the next day, he was carrying an insulated lunch bag. At first I thought it was for me, but he sat down on the battered leather armchair by my desk, took out half a sandwich and started eating it.

"Oh!" he said. "Don't you have anything to eat, Bella? I brought enough for two."

Edward arrived at exactly that moment with a brown paper bag and my flask.

"Same again?" Mike said, sniffing. "That's a bit boring, isn't it?"

"It's Bella's favourite," Edward said, placing my lunch on my desk. He wasn't wrong.

A customer came in and Edward turned to greet him, asking if he could be of any assistance. They disappeared from view.

"I don't like that guy," Mike muttered under his breath.

"Which guy?" I said, being deliberately obtuse.

"Your new friend. The way he looks at you… He's creepy."

"No more than you are, Mike. I know you were watching us through the window yesterday before closing time and now you're inviting yourself in for lunch."

We sat and ate in an uncomfortable silence until Edward returned with the customer and his book selection. I got up and moved to the cash desk at the front of the store to take the man's payment and then I showed him out.

I held the door wide open and turned around to see Mike staring at me and Edward glaring at Mike.

"Time to go, Mike," I said. "Lunchtime's over."

The instant he'd left, Edward relaxed and perched on the arm of the battered leather chair.

"I don't like that guy," he said.

"The feeling is mutual, apparently."

"You don't know what he was thinking, Bella. It's not…"

I looked at Mike standing outside the storefront with his face pressed up against the glass. "Okay, I'll give it my best shot," I said. "He was imagining me naked."

"How did you know?"

I frowned. How did he know? "Isn't that what all guys do?"

"Not all."

"So, since you arrived at my apartment, you haven't once imagined me naked?"

"Have you imagined me naked?"

"We're not talking about me, Edward. Stop deflecting and answer my question."

"I don't need to imagine it. Mike was just providing me with all the visuals I could want."

"Wonderful. So you're a mind reader now, are you?"

"Would you believe me if I said yes?"

"Probably not."

He was taking this being a creepy vampire thing a tad too seriously. I frowned at him before looking back at the window. Mike was walking away, shoulders hunched in defeat. I doubted it would last, though. He'd be back midday Tuesday.

"Would you like me to leave?" Edward asked.

I sighed. "No, you're okay. You can help me with the online orders."

I'd printed off the dispatch notes before lunch, so I split them into two piles and handed one of them to Edward. We crossed paths a few times as we hunted down our prey. Then, with only one more book to find, I left Edward in Ancient History and made my way through the bookcases to the opposite end of the store.

I could see the book I needed on the top shelf. It was a thick book and the typography on the spine was nice and clear. I put my foot on the first shelf from the bottom and propelled myself up to reach for it.

The bookcase shifted with my weight and, in my mind's eye, I realised all too late that the way in which the books were arranged made it top heavy.

Back I fell, crying out Edward's name as I went. A ring of steel wrapped around my waist and I was turned mid-fall as books flew in all directions. I bent forward and put my hands on my thighs, trying to catch my breath, grateful that I was still being supported.

"Are you hurt?" Edward said in my ear. I could feel his hard chest pressed against my back.

"Just winded," I said, panting.

His arm slackened and I turned my head to look at him, just in time to see him straighten up to his full height, thus pushing the bookcase back into position. It banged against the wall and rocked for a moment before it was still.

"Oh no, Edward! Your back!"

I twisted around and ran my hands up and down his back, studying his face for a reaction. He didn't wince but he did close his eyes, smile softly and make that odd purring sound.

After several minutes of massage, he opened his eyes and whispered, "I'm fine, Bella. Really."

I stared up at him. His eyes were darker than they had been that morning. How many sets of contact lenses did he own?

"Thank you," I said, stretching up on my toes to place a quick kiss on his cheek.

"That's it? You're not going to ask me any questions?"

"Should I?"

"You don't want an explanation?"

I frowned. "It doesn't matter to me how you did it, Edward, I'm just grateful that you saved me and neither of us is hurt." I bent down and started picking up the fallen books.

"I'll do that," Edward said. "Go and get yourself a hot drink. And Bella…"

"Yes?"

"Promise me that you will fetch the stepladder next time."

Truth be told, if I had been on my own, I most certainly would have fetched the stepladder, but I'd been having such a nice time in Edward's company, I'd temporarily lost all sense of self-preservation.

By the time I'd placed a steaming mug of tea on my desk, Edward was there with all the ordered books. We packed them up together and put them in the canvas tote bags, ready to go to the post office.

"I can take them," Edward said. "In case a customer comes in."

I looked out at the pouring rain. I hadn't even noticed that the weather had changed. "Unlikely now," I said. "Let's close up early and go together."

"I'll bring your truck around," he said, fetching his coat and snatching my keys off my desk.

…

On our way back home from the post office, I realised it was the second day in a row he'd ridden with me.

"Where did you leave your car, Edward?

"I don't need one," he said.

"How did you get to the store?"

"I turned into a bat and flew."

I laughed. "Carrying a flask and a sandwich bag?"

"Ah. You've got me there." He grinned at me. "I walked, Bella. You should try it sometime, but perhaps when the weather is better."

"That is the most unbelievable thing I have ever heard," I said, pulling into my driveway. "No one walks. You should have stuck with the bat story. It was far more plausible."

* * *

 **A Big Thank You** **to** both winterhorses and Vagabonda for posting story updates on Facebook; to Rita01tx for featuring Rent-A-Vampire on her blog, Rob Attack; to DataByteDL-FangirlinGranma for using her grandmotherly powers of persuasion, and to Tarbecca for her rec in the Fic Dive over at A Different Forest.


	5. Edge

**5\. Edge**

The rain had gotten heavier on our journey home. Before getting out of my truck, I got my house keys ready, pulled my hood up over my head and tucked my purse underneath my red velvet cloak.

Edward grabbed my wrist and took the keys from my hand, seemingly a lot happier about getting out of the truck into the pouring rain than I was. He stood and sniffed the air several times and then paused at the base of the steps to take in a deeper breath. The broad grin on his face made a nice change from the grimace he'd had on it the previous two evenings.

As soon as I saw him open the front door, I made a run for it. Once we'd removed our sodden boots, I took his coat and my cloak into the bathroom to drip dry and fetched him a towel for his hair.

In the kitchen, I put a pan of water on to boil and rooted around in the freezer, transferring a steak to the refrigerator for my Sunday dinner and retrieving the last portion of bolognese sauce to reheat in the microwave. The spaghetti was almost cooked when I noticed that Edward was squatting in front of my bookcase, staring at all the spines on the lower shelves.

"You don't have a single ghost, monster or fantasy story in your collection, do you?"

"No. That's more Angela's cup of tea than mine," I said, carrying the pan over to the sink.

"Angela?"

"She's my best friend. My only friend really."

"You like your own company?"

"I prefer it."

"I understand."

My back was to him while I drained the pasta so I couldn't tell if he truly understood or if he'd taken offence, but what I'd said made me stop and think.

For two whole days, I'd enjoyed Edward's company at home and at the bookstore more than I liked to admit, in spite of some of his more creepy behaviour. But it wasn't a real relationship. I'd paid good money for him to live with me for six weeks and, for the first time, the thought of it made me feel ill.

I turned around to look at him but he was no longer by the bookcase.

"Edward?"

"Yes?" His voice was muffled.

"Where have you gone?"

"I'm in the closet."

He stepped out carrying an armful of clothes and I immediately assumed the worst. I had offended him.

"Please don't leave," I said. "I like having you here."

"Thank you, Bella. I'm very much enjoying being here with you."

"You have to say that, though, don't you?"

"Do I? Why would you think I'd lie to you?"

"Because I've paid for you to be here."

He stared at me for a moment. "I meant it when I said I understand. I much prefer to keep my own company too… usually." He nodded toward the sink. "Your pasta is getting cold."

And then he turned and walked into the bathroom.

…

I was aware of the light shining through my eyelids and then it was dark again. I rubbed my eyes, blinking until I could focus on Edward standing between my bed and the window, watching me. He had opened the curtains and pulled up the kitchen blind. It was bright outside but not sunny.

"Your breakfast is ready," he said.

I stumbled to the bathroom to relieve myself and splash some cold water on my face. I didn't usually get up that early on a Sunday. I headed to the kitchen and sat down at the table to eat the omelette that was waiting for me.

For someone who professed to not eat human food, Edward was remarkably good at preparing it. I sipped at my coffee and looked across at him over the top of my cup. His eyes were almost black – the darkest I had seen them yet.

"Have you changed your contact lenses?" I asked.

"I'm thirsty, Bella," he said. "I haven't fed in almost three days and it's showing in the colour of my eyes."

"And today is the day." I set my cup down on its saucer. "What would you like to eat?"

"You." I shivered at the thought, conscious of the goosebumps forming on my forearms. "And I know it might seem a little impertinent," he said, "but would you mind wearing a dress today, Bella?"

"I only have two winter dresses. I don't often have occasion to wear them, but I can if you like. Do you want to choose which one?"

The coffee must not have been doing its job effectively – either that or I was still half asleep – because I hadn't even seen him leave the table. Only a second seemed to have passed before he was coming out of the closet with my long, navy blue jersey dress.

I got up from the table, took the hanger from him and went to the bathroom to shower and change.

After wiping the steam off the mirror, I pinned my hair back at the sides and looked at myself in the dress. The scooped neckline and three quarter length sleeves displayed my pulse points perfectly. That had to be why he had chosen it.

…

We'd both sat down at the kitchen table with the same intention. I watched Edward fill his fountain pen with dark blue ink, not spilling a single drop. He opened one of his notebooks to a clean page and began to write in a cursive style from another time. It was almost calligraphic.

Looking down at my own handwriting, I wondered if I were to switch from a ballpoint pen to a fountain pen, would my writing look anywhere near as beautiful as his?

"What are you writing?" he asked.

"My shopping list."

"You need more bread, cheese and tomato soup," he said. I smiled to myself. Those were the first three items on the list. "And red meat. Lots of it. And green leafy vegetables."

I raised my eyebrows and glanced across at him, but he was still focussed on his own task. I put my pen down and switched on my laptop. I hadn't written anything for a few days so I had to reread several paragraphs and consult my notes before I could make a start.

Minutes passed with only the sounds of my fingers on the computer keys and Edward's pen nib moving softly across the paper.

"What are you typing, Bella?"

"A story."

"You're an author?"

"Yes."

"Would I know your work?"

"No. I'm not published, apart from in the odd magazine. No one is interested in reading what I write."

"Why not?"

"It's not… current, fashionable… I don't know. I don't really like…"

"What?"

"I'd rather not say."

"You have me intrigued now."

I blew out a breath. "I don't write the right genre for modern tastes. I don't do fantasy or horror."

"Ah. You don't write about vampires, werewolves and ghosts."

His eyes were fixed on mine and his body seemed to be leaning toward me over the tabletop. Or was I leaning toward him? My breathing became shallower and my head began to spin, but I could not look away.

He pulled back suddenly, got up from his chair and crouched down beside mine, looking up at my face. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to do that."

"What did you just do to me?" I whispered.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Why not?"

"Because you're a sceptic. You won't believe in what is staring you right in the face."

"And what would that be?"

"A vampire, and a thirsty one at that."

He was very good. He had my skin tingling and my heart racing. It was the first time in my life I'd experienced a physical reaction like that to anyone.

He stood up and walked slowly back to his chair. I turned my attention back to my computer and was soon lost in my own little world. I didn't even notice that Edward had moved his chair around the table and sat down beside me until I felt his right arm and his right thigh pressed up against me.

He was holding a plate of food in his left hand. I pushed my laptop away and he set it down on the table in front of me. The melted cheese smelled absolutely delicious.

I could feel his eyes on me, watching my every move while I ate my sandwich. At one point, I noticed his tongue peek out of the corner of his mouth and then swipe across his lips. I'd have done the same if I'd had to watch someone else eating grilled cheese.

After lunch, I moved to the sofa to work through the afternoon. Sunday was my one day to do just what I wanted. I would do all my chores on Monday.

Edward paced around the room in ever decreasing circles, his own writing completely forgotten. I could feel his eyes on me at all times. It was both unnerving and distracting and it brought back the less than pleasant memory of Paul's possessive behaviour at the New Year's party.

And then he stopped beside the sofa and sat down. He sidled closer and closer until I saved my work, closed my laptop and put it on the blanket chest.

"Would you like to sit on my lap?" I asked, laughing.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I can't help myself. Just knowing I'm going to feed from you this evening has me on edge. I can't stop thinking about it and it's bringing out the hunter in me."

"You look tired, Edward." I frowned. He had dark circles under his eyes. Wearing coloured contact lenses all the time could not be good for him. I grabbed a pillow and put it on my lap. "Here. Lay your head down and take a nap."

I started by running my fingers through his hair, much as I had done on the night he'd arrived, and then I massaged his scalp. His skin was cold to the touch. He closed his eyes and made that odd purring sound and, slowly but surely, I felt my own eyes drooping.

When I woke up, the first thing to assault my nostrils was the smell of steak frying in the pan. I rubbed my eyes, got up and walked over to the table. It was set for one with a glass of red wine already poured.

I wandered off to the bathroom and when I returned, my steak, jacket potato and salad were waiting for me. I sat down and Edward took his seat beside me. I had the most bizarre idea that he was going to pick up the knife and fork and feed me. He didn't, but he did watch as I fed myself.

When I'd finished the last mouthful of steak and drunk the last drop of my wine, he leaned in and whispered in my ear, "My turn."

It felt as if the whole day had been building up to that moment. I stood up slowly and crossed the room. He followed behind me.

"How shall we do this?" I asked, turning around. "Should I lie down on the sofa or drape myself across your lap?"

He shook his head and stalked toward me.

I backed away. "Should I run around screaming until you catch me?"

He shook his head again and licked his lips. "Just… stand right there and lean against the wall. Be very still, Bella."

"Neck or wrist?" I whispered. "Or are you a breast man?"

He dropped to his knees in front of me. "This is why you're wearing a dress," he said, trailing the fingers of both hands up my bare legs, raising the hem of my dress as he went.

"Hold this, please," he said and, as I took hold of the hem, he tapped a finger where I presumed he intended to bite.

"Inner thigh? Seriously? That's kinky."

"It's discreet. No one need know."

"You don't want it on display?"

"Definitely not. I'm not proud of what I am or what I need to do to sustain myself. And you are not a trophy." He looked up at me. "Forgive me, I just…"

He stroked the backs of his hands down my legs to the insides of my knees and pressed outward. I shifted my feet a little wider apart and looked down. He closed his eyes, pressed the tip of his nose to my left inner thigh and then he inhaled.

He slid his nose slowly up my leg until it was dangerously close to something that was not part of the rental agreement, and then he bit me.

It stung at first and I cried out, letting go of my dress and pressing my hands flat against the wall to steady myself. Then he started sucking my blood and the sensations that coursed through my body were indescribably delicious.

He must have fed for a mere thirty seconds before he stopped. Then his cold tongue licked the wound over and over until my head spun.

When I'd recovered myself, he was sitting back on his heels, his cheeks tinged with colour. There was a tiny smear of blood at the corner of his mouth.

"Oh my!" I said. "I am so feeding you every day."

"You can't. You have to make up the blood I've taken. Three days isn't even sufficient for you to recover properly. We couldn't do this indefinitely, not without…"

"Oh." Pity. "Um, you have a little blood…" I pointed to the same spot on my own mouth. His tongue darted out to clean the blood away and then he shivered.

After a minute of so, he stood up and brushed the backs of his cold fingers over my flushed cheeks.

"Cup of tea?" he asked.

…

That was the first night I dreamed of Edward Cullen and it wasn't pretty.

I woke up screaming in Edward's arms.

"Shh, Bella, It's alright."

"You didn't stop it," I said, clutching his forearm.

"Stop what? Feeding?"

"The bookcase. We were squashed beneath the bookcase, and you weren't breathing."


	6. Clock

**6\. Clock**

At times I wondered if I had it all wrong. I'd spend Sunday trying to write when I hadn't had any time to think and then spend Monday doing my chores while the ideas flowed, but I barely had the time to stop and put pen to paper.

I was up early, but Edward had beaten me to the kitchen and was already making my breakfast. It was as if he'd known when I was about to stir.

In the bathroom, I inspected the bite on my thigh and found myself grateful to Edward for not choosing somewhere more visible. It was not the classic two-holed puncture I'd seen in the movies; it was formed of two crescent-shaped marks, exactly as one would expect from a set of human teeth.

And yet what should have been was not. No human bite could heal so readily or so soon. A scar like that should have taken months to form if not longer.

…

While I ate the last of the eggs with some toast, Edward cleaned up the kitchen with his back to me. It was only when he placed my coffee cup down on the table that I noticed his eyes had returned to the bright red they had been on his arrival.

He came with me to the grocery store but opted to stay in the truck while I went inside. He said he didn't feel comfortable around that many people at once, but I suspected that, like most men, he just hated shopping.

I wasn't a big fan of shopping either, which was why I always wrote a list and whizzed around the aisles, getting only the items I needed. I would have been in and out in fifteen minutes if the checkout boy hadn't deliberately taken it slow to flirt with me.

At that point, Edward arrived to assist me with the packing. He pushed the trolley out into the parking lot and loaded everything into the truck bed.

Once the groceries were unpacked and put away at home, I gathered up the bedding and the towels and heaped them on top of the dirty clothes in my plastic laundry basket. Edward added a few items of his own and offered to carry it all for me.

Right from the outset, my landlady had allowed me to use her washer and dryer to do my laundry. It didn't matter what time of day it was, she was always there to let me in.

She looked particularly pleased to meet Edward and fussed over him while I sorted the first load into the washer. I left them chatting while I went back upstairs to start cooking a week's worth of dinners.

…

It was a foolish error for which I could only blame myself. The front door was on the latch for Edward and the kitchen window was ajar to let out the steam. What hungry wolf could resist?

"Ugh, Bella what is that smell?"

I groaned and looked over my shoulder. "That would be my chilli, Jacob. I'm glad you don't like the smell because I was intending to keep it all for myself."

He was beside me in an instant, leaning over the pot, sniffing appreciatively. "Not your chilli. That smells really good. I meant the other smell. It's sickly sweet."

"I have no idea what you mean, Jacob," I said, sniffing the air.

He reached across me to grab a piece of the cornbread, which was still cooling on the rack. I smacked his hand away and said, "What made you think it was safe to venture out of the doghouse?"

"Come on, Bella! I've missed you."

He put on his best hangdog expression and, against my better judgement, I began to waver. "So," I said, "what have you been up to?"

"I've been working," he replied.

"Good. Then you have enough money to go buy your own dinner."

There was a snort behind us and we both turned to look at Edward standing just inside the front door with the laundry basket. "He's been dating someone who doesn't cook anywhere near as well as you do," he said.

I didn't stop to think about how Edward knew that or if it was true. "You've been dating Angela? She never said."

"Who's this?" Jacob said, glaring at Edward.

"This is my friend, Edward. Edward, this is Jacob."

Jacob shifted closer and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. Edward laughed, opened the closet door and disappeared inside with the laundry basket. He reappeared seconds later with the bedding and strolled over to the blanket chest to put it away.

While Jacob watched his every move, I turned to stir my chilli and put the lid on the pot.

"Didn't take long for you to replace me," Jacob muttered, making another grab for the cornbread. With his large hand, he managed to snatch up two pieces at once.

"Jacob!" I waved my wooden spoon at him, splattering chilli on his chin. "You can hardly complain if you're dating Angela. You know I've never seen you as more than a friend and sometimes even that was under sufferance."

Edward must have made a return visit to the closet and ventured right to the back because whatever Jacob said in reply was drowned out by the noise of the vacuum cleaner.

Jacob winced. He hated loud noises. He wiped the chilli off his chin with one finger and licked it clean. He mouthed goodbye and then, stuffing one of the pieces of cornbread into his mouth, he turned his back on me and strode out of the front door. It slammed shut behind him.

I looked over at Edward with my eyebrows raised and he switched off the vacuum cleaner.

"Well," he said, "at least I know now why it's been stinking of dog outside your house. Your pet wolf has been doing a thorough job of marking his territory."

"What?!"

That Edward knew Jacob was one of the wolf pack was hardly a surprise. Rent-A-Werewolf had posters of their half-naked escorts all over town. Everyone knew who they were.

How he'd come to the conclusion that Jacob was urinating on the walls of my building, though, was another matter. I was very glad that I didn't possess Edward's sense of smell. If I ever caught Jacob in the act, he'd be in serious pain – once he'd finished his business and done up his fly, obviously.

But what really concerned me was that Jacob hadn't denied that he and Angela were dating. Why hadn't she told me? We were supposed to be best friends.

…

Tuesday was another rainy day, much to Edward's delight. While I ate the baked eggs with spinach he'd made for me and dutifully downed my orange juice, Edward prepared my bagged lunch.

He drove my truck to the bookstore, dropping me off at the front door before driving around the back to park. He was soaking wet when he came in. He hung his coat up beside my cloak on the coat stand but waited until he was beside me to shake the rain out of his hair.

"Edward!" I wiped my face and switched on the computer.

He picked a book up off the desk and sat down on the battered leather armchair. The clock ticked, he turned his pages and my fingers tapped at the keyboard, but otherwise we were silent for a while.

"Bella?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you always manage the store alone?"

"Pretty much, yes. The owner isn't good with people and he's nomadic by nature. He likes to be on the road, searching through thrift stores, garage sales and house clearances. He ships the books here whenever he has enough to fill a box or two."

"How did you get the job?"

"My landlady is his aunt. She does the accounts."

"You do know that your landlady is a ghost, don't you, Bella?"

"She is not! I can see her."

"Of course you can see her. These days ghosts have no reason to hide and since the law was changed, they are entitled to remain in their own homes."

"I've never understood how that one works. If every dead person were to keep their home, eventually there would be nowhere for the living to live?"

"Not every dead person is stuck here though, are they? This lady must have unfinished business to attend to. Meanwhile, she has a house to maintain and that requires an income."

"Poor Mrs C. I wonder why she's still here," I said, humouring him.

A box of books arrived at ten o'clock and while I priced and catalogued them, Edward tidied the shelves and dealt with the occasional customer. I didn't realise the time until Mike arrived.

He sat and ate his lunch with me but didn't seem in a great hurry to go back to his own store. When he did eventually stand up, he left his lunch bag on my desk and walked across the store to the Sports section.

Edward came to stand beside me, bending down to whisper in my ear, "I don't believe it! He's doing it again. It's as if he knows."

"Knows what?"

"That I can read his mind."

I didn't want to know whether Edward was telling the truth or just very intuitive. I bit my lip and hoped he would keep quiet, at least until after Mike had left. Thankfully, Mike's assistant poked her head around the door and asked him to come and attend to a difficult customer.

Edward started up again as soon as he'd gone. "I was wrong last week. This isn't some perverted little fantasy. He's isn't _imagining_ you naked, Bella, he's remembering!"

My stomach churned. I really didn't want to see my tomato soup again.

"He's in love with you!" Edward said, rounding the desk to face me.

If he could read minds so well, why wasn't he listening to mine? "Stop, Edward. Please," I said.

"I almost feel sorry for the man. He doesn't stand a chance, does he?"

"No," I whispered. "Not with me."

"Does he make a nuisance of himself every day or is this because I'm here?"

"Oh, don't flatter yourself, Edward. He's done this for as long as I've been working here. Even before that. I've known him since high school."

"I could kill him for you if you like."

"No, thank you, Edward."

"I could scare him then."

I shook my head and sighed. It was going to be a long afternoon.

The steady run of customers seeking refuge from the rain came to an end around four o'clock. I made myself a cup of tea and sat down at the desk.

Edward perched on one arm of the battered leather chair. "How long ago exactly were you with Mike?" he asked.

"Years."

"Was it just the once?"

"Edward! That's none of your business!"

"Only he has remembered you in several different positions."

I stopped short of chucking my hot tea over his crotch and set my cup down carefully. I put my elbows on the desk and dropped my face into my hands.

I felt Edward's hand rest gently on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't realise. He broke your heart, didn't he?"

I sighed, raised my head and looked across the room, staring at nothing in particular. "No, Edward. I broke his."

My relationship with Mike had never been an emotional one for me. It was about companionship and sex, nothing more. And then one day, the dopey boy confessed his feelings.

Maybe some would consider what I did to be unkind, but I couldn't pretend. I couldn't lie. That really would have been cruel.

…

It was raining again on Wednesday and the temperature had dropped markedly.

At Edward's request, I wore my long, navy blue dress but, despite the cold, I drew the line at wearing tights. I loathed tights and anything akin to them, only wearing them when absolutely necessary. The dress was just long enough to get away with socks and knee length boots.

I drove us to the store and Edward came around to open my door as soon as I'd parked the truck. He stuck close to me as we walked through the alleyway so when my cloak flapped open, I felt the smooth, cool skin of the back of his hand brush against mine.

He followed me around the store all morning, never letting me out of his sight, even when we had customers. Minutes short of midday, he grabbed the keys from the desk drawer and locked the front door, flipping the sign to say Closed.

He turned and stalked toward me, his eyes now black. "I can't keep my eyes off you, Bella," he said, "and I can't wait until tonight."

In other circumstances, I'd have taken that statement as purely anticipatory, but that wasn't what he meant. He did not intend to wait, but he was going to have to.

"I need the bathroom," I said. How I broke from his gaze, I do not know, but I ran to the back, shut myself in the little room and put my hand to my heaving chest.

I looked in the mirror above the tiny hand basin. I was flushed with excitement at the prospect of what we were going to do, right there, in the bookstore. I composed myself, relieved myself and, after washing my hands, splashed cold water on my face. Then, taking a deep breath, I flung the door open, narrowly missing Edward's face.

"Um, it opens outward," I said by way of an apology, trying to stifle a nervous giggle.

He didn't laugh. He pressed forward so my back was against the door, put a hand on either side of my shoulders and stared into my eyes.

"I need you to help me stop," he said. "Your blood is… quite delicious. Could you put your hands on my head and tug at my hair when my time is up?"

"How will I know?"

"Count the seconds from the moment you feel my teeth," he said, lowering himself to his knees. He raised my dress and waited for me to hold the hem. "Count to thirty."

The moment he bit into my thigh, my hands were in his hair. It was so soft and silky, I couldn't keep my fingers from playing with it. My mind was floating, my body was tingling and the clock on the wall was ticking.

Thirty seconds went by and I tugged at his hair gently. "Edward, ohhh."

Perhaps it's wasn't the most convincing of attempts to stop him, but it must have been enough because he stopped sucking and started licking. The long flat sweeps of his tongue covered far more skin than his mouth had done. He made a strange noise – half growl, half groan – and it was all I could do not to guide him further north.

He pulled free of my grip and sat back on his heels, cheeks tinged pink, licking his lips and staring up at me with dark, red-black eyes. I slid slowly down onto the floor, completely dazed.

"Thank you, Bella," he whispered.

"Why do I feel like I should be the one thanking you?"


	7. Perch

**7\. Perch**

Someone was rapping loudly on the glass pane of the front door. I could hear Mike calling out my name and asking if I was okay, the tone of his voice becoming increasingly agitated.

"I'd better go and appease him," Edward said. "Don't you even think about moving."

I couldn't have moved if I'd wanted to, so I listened to the sounds of the key turning in the lock, the bell clanging loudly, the whispered but heated conversation, the door being locked again and then Edward's footsteps coming back to me.

"What did you tell him?" I asked.

"I told him the truth."

"Which is?"

"You're feeling faint so we've closed the store until you are feeling better."

I snorted. "And he accepted that?"

"Not really, no. He'll be back in fifteen minutes."

Edward helped me up and wrapped an arm around my waist to guide me to the chair at my desk. He disappeared out back and returned with a cup of tea.

"Here," he said. "Drink this and make a start on your sandwich. You need to get some colour back in those cheeks."

With Edward standing by my side, I took a sip of hot tea and tore open the sandwich bag. There was something dark green in between the layers of grilled cheese. It looked suspiciously like spinach leaves but it tasted good.

Anything would have tasted good at that point in time because I suddenly felt ravenous.

I was working my way through the second half of the sandwich, dipping it into my soup, when Mike returned. Edward unlocked the door and Mike marched straight over to me and put his hand on my forehead. His palm was sweaty.

"Are you okay now, Bella?" he asked.

"Fine, Mike. Much better for a cup of tea and some lunch."

He sat on the arm of the battered leather armchair and stared at me, his eyes roaming over my face, neck and chest as if he were looking for something. It made me feel uncomfortable.

"My assistant is out to lunch," he said, "so if you're sure you're okay, I'll go. But remember, I'm only next door if you need me."

I frowned. "Er, thanks, Mike."

After he'd gone, Edward reclaimed his spot, sitting on the arm of the chair.

"He thought I'd bitten you," he said.

"You have."

"Not quite like that. He was terrified I'd either drained you dry or made you like me."

"And why would he be worried about that?"

"Because he knows what I am. He is none too keen on the likes of me spending time with the woman he loves."

"Ah." I had to admire Edward's creative spin on Mike's jealousy, but Mike couldn't possibly know that Edward was an escort. I hadn't told anyone and neither was I going to.

He shook his head. "Ah? That's all you have to say?"

"Yep," I said, putting the cap and cup back on the flask. "Time to fulfil some online orders. I think I'll make it fairer today by giving the vampire two-thirds of the pile and the human just one."

Edward still beat me, but only because I was shorter and had to fetch the stepladder. In lieu of a prize, I made him do all the packing. We closed the store early enough to drop by the post office on the way home and then went through what was becoming our regular evening routine.

Tiredness hit much earlier than usual, though, so while I yawned my way through my bowl of reheated chilli, Edward made up the bed for me. I had no idea how or where he slept, be it alongside me or hanging from the rafters, because I was out for the count from the moment my head met my pillow.

It was an effort to get out of bed the next morning and it took two cups of strong black coffee before I felt ready to leave the house. Edward drove the truck and I woke up cradled in his arms as he was opening the front door of the store.

"What is the matter with me today?" I mumbled.

"I'm not sure. I either took too much blood too soon yesterday or a small trace of venom got into your system. I'm so sorry, Bella."

By lunchtime, my vision was blurry and no sooner had that cleared than my head was pounding. I laid the side of my face on the cool wood of the desk and closed my eyes.

A warm, clammy hand touched my forehead. It made me feel nauseous. "What have you done to her?"

The warm hand was replaced by a much nicer cold one. "I'm going to close up and take her home."

"I'll take her home, Edward. You can stay here and mind the store."

"No, Mike. She wouldn't want to impose upon you. She'd be most insistent."

"You're not her boyfriend."

"Neither are you, but I'm staying with her at the moment and her well-being is my responsibility."

I lifted my head off the desk. "Could you two shut up. My head is hurting."

When I next stirred, I was lying down with my face up against something ice cold. It was soothing and smelled wonderful, so I snuggled closer and felt a hair or two tickle my nose. Cool fingers traced over the back of my neck.

"Ssh, Bella. Sleep."

"Where am I?"

"At home in bed."

"You're not Mike are you, Edward?"

My body was shaken by his laughter. "No."

"You're freezing cold again. It's really nice."

"You were a little warm. I thought you might prefer a cold Edward to a cold shower."

"Mmm. You have a very nice chest."

"Thank you."

"You're not going to return the compliment?"

"Maybe another time, should an appropriate occasion arise."

"Mmm."

…

As if by magic, I woke up on Friday feeling as right as rain and wondering if my night in Edward's arms was just a dream. I could hear the shower going so I padded over to the kitchen for a glass of water. I had just put the coffee machine on when Edward came out of the bathroom.

We swapped places and while I washed and changed, Edward made my breakfast. When I sat down to eat it, I could tell he was watching me closely.

"I'm okay," I insisted. "Really, I am. It was just a migraine. I get them every once in a while."

"You had me quite worried, Bella, and I'm not convinced I didn't have something to do with it."

"It could have been started by anything, Edward. The lighting at work, something I ate, cheese, coffee… hormones." I really hoped it wasn't cheese or coffee.

He studied my face. "Are you sure you should be going into work?"

"I'll be fine. It's not the most arduous of jobs and I do happen to have a very capable assistant."

As the words left my mouth, it occurred to me that my capable assistant would not be with me forever. He was paid to accompany me for six weeks, not to work at the bookstore, and already one of those weeks had gone.

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"I said, would you like another coffee before we go?"

"Yes, thank you, Edward." I pushed my cup toward him.

"What has you looking so maudlin? Are you not feeling as well as you thought?"

He put his hand on my forehead and, despite me no longer needing a cold compress, I leaned into it, welcoming his touch. I looked up at his eyes. They had darkened already and yet he wasn't due to feed again for another day.

How quickly I had come to accept something so… odd. Or was it simply a kink, a perversion. One I appeared to share.

"Bella, are you sure you're alright? Your cheeks are little flushed."

…

Edward took on all the orders that day and left to post them before lunch. Mike must have seen him leaving because he was in the bookstore moments later, holding a bunch of brightly coloured gerbera daisies in a tall, narrow vase. He set the arrangement on my desk.

"Thank you, Mike," I said. "They're very pretty."

He smiled and turned but he didn't leave. Instead he pottered around the store, pulling the odd book off a shelf and putting it back again, while I attempted to concentrate on my work.

When he'd completed his circuit he came back to stand in front of my desk. "What is that guy doing to you, Bella?" he asked.

"Edward's done nothing but look after me. It was only a migraine."

"You felt faint the day before." He glanced over his shoulder at the door and then looked back at me. "You really should be careful around his kind. They're not designed to fall in love with us, Bella."

"Who mentioned love?"

"You're not falling in love with him?"

I took time to consider my reply. An answer in the affirmative would only encourage Mike to double his efforts. Unfortunately, an answer in the negative might possibly have a similar effect.

I looked him in the eye. "You of all people know my feelings on love, Mike, and no, I am not falling in love with Edward."

The bell clanged as the door opened. Mike turned to see who it was and grinned from ear to ear

"See you tomorrow, Bella," he said, and then he walked right past Edward and out of the door.

Edward's mouth twitched and then slowly pulled up into the most beautiful of smiles that reached his dark red eyes. I couldn't help but smile right back, especially when I saw the brown paper sandwich bag in his hand.

"I went home to fix you some lunch," he said, "seeing as we didn't have time this morning."

The words were on my lips without a moment's hesitation. "I love grilled cheese."

…

The afternoon was a slow one. I wandered about the store with a yellow cloth in my hand, rearranging books and wiping dust off the shelves. Usually I enjoyed the silence of days like that. It was a chance to think about my own stories, to develop characters and plots in my head, completely undisturbed.

But that day, I found myself contemplating my own life, or lack thereof. I wasn't a particularly sociable creature, nor was I ambitious. I liked the comforts of my routines, the quiet nature of my work and the solitude at home, and Edward had slotted into all of that so easily, it was as if he had always been there.

And yet it was all a charade, wasn't it? And if there was one thing I abhorred, it was make-believe and fantasy.

…

I stretched my legs under the covers, pointing my toes, and then reached my arms up overhead and yawned. I could feel the smooth cotton sheets against my legs. Where were my pyjama bottoms?

A movement above me caught my eye and no sooner had I looked up than I was jumping out of bed, dragging the top sheet with me. I tilted my head back and stared up at the roof with my hand over my mouth.

Edward was sitting on one of the joists with his legs dangling down and his head bowed over a paperback book.

"What the hell are you doing up there?" I said through gritted teeth.

"Reading," he said, turning a page.

"Come down this instant and don't you dare fold the corner to mark your place!"

"The very idea! I'm insulted by the insinuation. Besides, I have no need to mark my place. I have a photographic memory."

He dropped to the ground with such grace, he didn't even make the softest of thuds when he landed in a crouch in front of me. The expression on his face would have been unnerving but for the tiniest glint of amusement in his red-black eyes.

"Back to the wall, Bella," he said and I found myself doing exactly as he'd instructed, shuffling backward, clutching the sheet to my chest.

He fell forward onto his hands and knees and crawled toward me, lifting the edge of the sheet and slowly slipping underneath it.

I could feel his cool breath on my bare legs as he worked his way up to his mark. The tip of his tongue licked at my thigh just the once before he bit me and then he started sucking, long and slow.

He stopped himself this time, although I have no idea long he fed for, and then the combined sensations of his tongue sealing the wound and his nose nuzzling at my panties had my body shuddering and my head swimming. My breathing got shallower until I was crying out – and then he was gone.

I slumped down into a heap on the floor.

"Edward?" I whispered. "Where did you go?"

He reappeared in front of me, holding a cup of hot tea, and sat down on the floor by my side with his legs crossed.

"What were you doing up there?" I nodded at the joist.

"Reading."

I took the cup from him and sipped at the tea. "You could have read beside me in bed."

He blew out a breath. "I was resisting temptation."

"My blood?"

"Um… you were removing your clothing in your sleep and you…"

I put the cup of tea down and covered my face with my hands, peeking through my fingers.

"You, um, talk in your sleep. Did you know that? I thought it best I distract myself."

I vaguely remembered feeling too warm in the night and wiggling out of my pyjama bottoms. But what had I said? What had I done?

I raised the sheet and covered my face in embarrassment but, in doing so, I noticed a smear of blood between my thighs. "Edward, you didn't finish sealing the wound."

"I did, Bella. That blood isn't from your wound."

"Oh." It took me a moment to figure it out. "Oh! Well, that explains the migraine," I mumbled, shuffling slowly toward the bathroom on my bottom with the sheet still over my head. "Please tell me that isn't why you wanted to feed again so soon."

Silence.

"Edward?"

He let out a loud laugh as if he'd been trying hard to contain it. "No, Bella. You've nothing to worry about on that score."

I stood up, wrapped the sheet around me and made a dash to the closet for clean clothes and supplies. Then I shut myself in the bathroom and leaned against the door.

"My period blood really doesn't… bother you?" I said, calling through the door, my fingers crossed.

"No."

"So, just the sleep talking then."

He laughed again.

While I stood under the hot water, I examined his bite mark. Nothing had changed. He had bitten over the first bite twice and yet he had been so precise, so exact, anyone would have assumed I'd only been bitten the once.

I thought back over this most recent episode. Edward wasn't just a convincing actor, dedicated to his role, he was an acrobat to boot.

* * *

 **A Big Thank You to :** Payton79 for recommending this story and to those members of the FaceBook groups Pay It Forward and No Rules Twilight Fanfic Rec Club who have also spread the word. Do please let me know who you are.


	8. Encore

**8\. Encore**

It was a very happy customer that walked out into the rain with his book haul tucked under his coat later that morning. He had been able to cross a considerable number of titles off his list, no small thanks to Edward who had known exactly where to find most of them. Some of the books would complete sets the man had been collecting for decades.

Unusually, he had paid his huge bill in cash and Edward had stood by me, watching as I'd put the bills into the cash register.

The man nodded another thank you to Edward through the window, pulled his coat collar up and hurried to his car.

"Bella?" Edward's voice brought me out of my reverie. "Why have I never seen you balance the register?"

"Not part of my job description," I replied. "Most customers pay with plastic, but if I've taken a lot in cash like today, I put a note in the drawer and the money in the safe."

"You don't ever deposit the money at the bank?"

"No. I've long since given up checking the register each morning like I did for the first few weeks. It has always been reset to the starting amount whenever I open up and seeing as she does the accounts, I've always presumed Mrs C comes in to sort it out overnight. I mean, I doubt it would be Alistair."

"Alistair?"

"The store owner."

"The nomadic store owner that sends books from all over?"

"The very same."

"Have you ever met him?"

"No."

The door opened, the bell clanged and Mike strode in, lunch bag in hand. He seemed to like changing it up and keeping me on my toes. Sometimes he had his lunch, sometimes he didn't, as if he'd been advised not to appear too predictable when trying to gain a woman's affections.

Me? I liked routine and I loved eating the exact same sandwich and soup everyday. Prior to Edward's arrival, I'd always gotten by on a couple of cookies and a coffee. What would I do when he left?

"How are you feeling today, Bella," Mike said. "You look a little pale."

"I'm fine, Mike," I said, making my way past him to my desk so I could eat my lunch.

"Are you sure?"

He made an attempt to put his sweaty hand on my forehead and in my effort to dodge him, I caught my thigh on the corner of the desk. The sharp pain made my tone of voice less courteous than it might otherwise have been.

"I'm on my period, Mike."

Mike blanched and backed away toward the door. "I've just remembered I need to… I'll see you Tuesday, Bella." He scurried back to his own store, his head down and his shoulders hunched in the rain.

"See?" I said to Edward. "That's how a normal man reacts to menstruation."

Why I'd never thought to use that form of repellant with Mike before defied comprehension, but I'd be sure to use it again.

…

That Sunday went much like the previous Sunday had, with one slight exception: I was the one doing the stalking. I shunted my chair closer and closer to Edward's at the kitchen table, trying my best to read what he was writing in his notebook with his fountain pen.

He wrote quickly and turned the pages frequently, and I soon found myself lulled into a daydream, drifting off into a world of erotic fantasy. That wasn't like me at all.

I imagined his fingers on my legs and his breath on my skin as he ran his nose up my thigh. I imagined his teeth sinking into my flesh and his tongue licking at my skin to seal the bite.

If Edward noticed my pounding heart and flushed cheeks, he didn't say anything. I didn't write a word of my own until he got up to make my lunch and even then I found his presence distracting. Thankfully, decamping to the sofa for the afternoon proved to be more productive.

Edward stuck to his iron-boosting recipes, serving steak on a bed of wilted spinach with grilled tomatoes and sautéed potatoes for my evening meal. The steak was rarer than it has been previously, bloodier than I had ever eaten it, but I savoured every mouthful, washing it down with the deliciously full-bodied red wine in my glass.

We danced around each other as we cleared up the kitchen. I got showered and changed while he made up the sofabed and we were soon side by side under the covers, each with a book in hand.

But the wine had made me sleepy so it wasn't long before I had to put my book down and accept defeat.

…

My hand was wrapped around something cold and hard. I stroked the smooth skin up and down before bringing it to the bite mark on my thigh. The chill on my skin sent shivers of delight through my body, as did the cool, sweet breath on my neck.

"Please, Bella. Wake up."

He wasn't supposed to be saying that.

"Please, Bella. I need you."

Ah, that was much better, although I did have a niggling feeling I might be dreaming. Hadn't I told him what I wanted him to do with me? Why was he waiting?

"Bella." The chill on my thigh vanished and a cold hand caressed my face. "Bella, you have to be awake – standing up."

I blinked a few times, gasping when I finally opened my eyes to meet Edward's. They looked so dark, I wondered if I were to turn on the lamp, would there be any red left in all that black.

"You've been calling for me in your sleep and I can't… I can't…"

I ran a hand down my body, feeling for my pyjama bottoms. They had gone missing again.

"What can't you do, Edward?" I whispered, frowning.

"Wait any longer. You've been begging me for over an hour. Please let me."

I hoped we were on the same page. "Let you… feed?"

He nodded his head and licked his lips. I sat up, feeling a little giddy at first, and dropped my feet to the side of the bed. I stood up and made my way unsteadily over to my spot, leaning against the wall, very aware that his eyes had not left me for a moment.

His movements were even slower than mine. Eventually, he knelt before me and ran his nose up and down my bare leg, the anticipation almost as delicious as the act itself. Then, when he sunk his teeth into my thigh and began to suck, it was glorious.

How many seconds he spent drinking my blood I could not say, but it had to have been longer than any of the previous occasions.

"Edward!" I gasped, my hands tugging at his hair. "Edward! You have to stop. I'm feeling faint."

"Oh, Bella. I'm so sorry. I can't… I have to get out of here." He swiped his tongue over the bite – two, maybe three times – and then he was gone.

I sunk down onto the floor and shivered. The air in my apartment had a sudden and distinct chill to it. On my hands and knees, I crawled over to the bed and climbed up, reaching across to switch on the lamp on the side table.

The source of the draft was immediately apparent. One of the windows was wide open. Wrapping a blanket around me, I clambered off the bed and shuffled over to the window to close it. I held onto the ledge and took a few deep breaths. I was feeling very light-headed and in need of a cup of tea and something to eat.

Where was Edward? He usually took care of me after feeding from me.

I made my way to the kitchen and, in the semi-darkness, I boiled a kettle for some tea. I opened my food cabinet in the hope of finding a snack but I rarely bought that kind of thing. Treats never lasted longer than a day when I did.

There was one bar of dark chocolate that I'd bought for baking. It would have to do. I sat down at the kitchen table and sipped at my tea and when it was finished, I nibbled at five squares of the chocolate, letting each bite melt in my mouth. Then I rested my arms on the table and my head on my arms.

A noise at the window – the one I'd closed earlier – woke me from my slumber. I sat bolt upright, frozen, too scared to look behind me. There was a knock at the door.

"Bella, it's me – Edward. Could you let me back in?"

I pushed back the kitchen chair, rewrapped the blanket and went to open the door. The blast of cold air as Edward entered brought me fully to my senses.

"Where did you go?" I asked, looking him up and down. He was a mess.

"The Olympic Forest," he said, pulling off his muddy boots.

"Your clothes are in shreds!"

"I had a run in with a mountain lion."

"Oh no, Edward! Are you hurt?"

"No, I'm fine. The lion, however…"

"What could you have possibly done to a mountain lion?"

"I drank him dry."

"Vampires can do that? With animals? I thought they could only drink human blood."

"It's the way we choose to survive."

"We?"

"My family and I."

I swayed on the spot and sensing my exhaustion, Edward scooped me up and carried me over to the bed, tucking me in and lying beside me on top of the covers. He smelled as if he'd been in the forest, but also there was a scent of something akin to rusted iron on his clothes that made me feel nauseous.

"Are you beginning to believe me now?" he whispered, but I was past the point of rational thought.

…

The disquiet I felt on waking would not leave me.

I'd taken far longer than necessary in the shower and changed my clothes three times in the closet – from my navy dress to my emerald green dress to my jeans, a long sleeved T-shirt and a chocolate brown, cabled sweater.

Eventually, I came out and sat down to eat my breakfast. Edward leaned against the kitchen counter and watched me. I kept my eyes on my food.

When I had put the last forkful of eggs and spinach into my mouth, chewed and swallowed, I picked up my coffee cup and stared into the black liquid.

"This is getting weird," I said, more to myself than to Edward.

He straightened up, picked up the other chair and brought it around the table, setting it down so he could sit at right angles to me.

"Bella?" I looked at him. His eyes were twinkling and his voice sounded hopeful. "Do you think that maybe you are beginning to accept I am what I say I am?"

"I'm sorry," I said, putting my cup back down. Coffee sloshed over the side of it onto the saucer. "I only wanted to hire you for one night, just for a few hours, to appease my supernatural obsessed friend, but the lady insisted…"

The light in his eyes had dimmed more and more with each word I'd uttered. "Go on," he said. "Finish your sentence."

"No. I think I'd better not."

"Just say it, Bella."

"The lady insisted the hire term was a minimum of 6 weeks."

"Did she give you a discount?"

"Yes, but only because I threatened to report her for false advertising."

"False advertising?"

I sighed. "None of the vampires pictured in the brochure were available for hire."

He slumped down in his chair and stared at my coffee cup. "You didn't even pick me."

"Not as such, no. She said…" I took a deep breath and blew it out slowly in an effort to relax my shoulders. "She said you were the only vampire available."

His face hardened into exactly the expression he'd had in the photograph she'd shown me.

"I would have picked you," I whispered.

"When?"

"If you had been in the brochure. If you'd been smiling like you have while you've been staying with me, I'd have picked you over all or any of the other three."

He raised his head. "But I wasn't and you were more than willing to pick one of them."

I averted my eyes.

"You did, didn't you?" he said. "Who did you pick first? Don't tell me. Let me guess. You picked Emmett."

"Who's Emmett?"

"My brother. He's a big guy, intimidating to some, but his smile is infectious and women can't resist those dimples."

I nodded and swallowed.

"I bet you chose my father next," he said.

I dared to look at him and asked, "The older, blond one?"

"Yes. I don't understand it myself, but he appeals to women across the board. He's like a magnet. Which means Jasper was last, not that he'd mind – much."

"Technically, you were last." I slapped my hand over my mouth, but it was too late. The damage was done.

"Thank you for the reminder." He pushed back from the table and stood up. "It appears you were misled by more than just the advertising and I've been duped."

He strode over to the closet and retrieved his coat. He put it on and buttoned it up before lifting my red velvet cloak off its hook and holding it out for me.

"Come with me," he said. "I'll get you your money back."

My heart was pounding as he draped the cloak over my shoulders. I bent down to pull on my boots. "But what about the Halloween party?" I said.

"I'll attend that for free, assuming you still want me to."

…

With the windshield wipers on full speed, I drove my truck up and down the little side street, looking for the distinctive olive green painted Rent-A-Vampire storefront.

I parked, pulled my hood up and got out into the rain. Walking back and forth with Edward trailing behind me, I looked at every single store. I even triple checked the name of the street.

"It's not here," I whispered, thoroughly perplexed.

"No." Edward's voice was flat. He did not seem at all surprised.

"But it hasn't even been two weeks since I was here. It's as if it never existed!"

* * *

 **A Big Thank You** **to:** TwilightWallflower for the Pay It Forward Facebook group rec' and to LizziePaige for posting update(s) there.


	9. Echo

**9\. Echo**

We stood facing each other on the sidewalk in the pouring rain while people walked around us. Edward's fists were clenched, his lips thin and his forehead furrowed. I touched one of his cold, bare hands and waited for it to unfurl before I interlaced my fingers with his.

"Do you have anywhere to go?" I asked. He shrugged. "Then it would appear we're stuck with each other."

I pressed my lips together but it was no good. I could not hold back my smile. The corresponding one on his face was wide but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

For the rest of the day, Edward went through the motions. He did almost everything he'd done the previous Monday but with less than half the enthusiasm.

He trudged around the grocery store, despite his previous reluctance, helped bag up my groceries at the checkout, loaded them into the truck and unloaded them again back at my apartment.

He helped with the laundry while I cooked a batch of dinners to freeze and he pushed the vacuum cleaner around the apartment while I scrubbed the bathroom.

In the following few days, he cooked my breakfasts and prepared my bagged lunches. He assisted customers in the bookstore, fulfilled half the orders and unpacked the four large boxes of books that arrived, presumably direct from a house clearance.

But whenever there wasn't anything for him to do, he stood or sat motionless, silent, empty.

It took Mike until lunchtime Friday to notice something wasn't quite right.

"What's the matter with him?" he asked, nodding his head toward Edward, who had been staring at the same bookshelf since before Mike arrived.

"He's had some unsettling news," I said. "Leave him be."

"Did he make your lunch? I have enough for two."

"No thanks, Mike," I said, pointing to the sandwich bag and flask on the desk.

Edward had not attempted to feed from me again since the early hours of Monday morning and I missed it. I missed him.

He hadn't read anything, he hadn't written anything and he had barely spoken a word to me. At times it was as if he had been turned into an impervious marble statue.

Strangely, as the days went on, instead of becoming darker, his eyes became lighter – so much so that by Saturday morning they were almost amber in colour. They looked stunning with his bronze hair.

I wondered if everything he was doing was still a part of the 'full immersion vampire experience' I'd been sold, but somehow that didn't ring true anymore. Deep down, I felt sure he was suffering.

Then, after Mike had left us on Saturday afternoon, Edward suddenly came back to life, perched as he was on the arm of the battered leather chair beside my desk.

"Why don't you love him back?" he asked.

"Ah," I said, scrunching up my sandwich bag and throwing it into the wastebasket. "I don't do love."

"You don't do love?"

"No. Love consumes and discards. I learned that at an early age and I don't want that for myself."

"What on earth happened to make you feel that way?"

"My mom left my dad when I was six months old and, as if that wasn't enough, she took me with her. As I grew up, I watched her fall in love with one man after another and every time it ended, she was broken-hearted. Then, when I was seventeen, she married a much younger man.

"I was done watching her and I was done picking up the pieces when she fell apart, so I went to live with my dad. He'd never recovered from her departure, never tried to love again, never become the man he was meant to be."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I know loneliness when I see it, Edward. I'm happy in my own company. My dad was not happy; he was merely existing."

"You say that as if he were dead. Is he?"

"Not in the literal sense."

"I think my family has deserted me."

"Oh, Edward! Why?"

"The house we were living in is empty, none of their phone numbers work and my attempts to contact them by email have all failed. Not one has reached its destination."

"Have you tried searching for them on the internet?"

"Yes, by every name and alias I can think of. Nothing. I'm not so sure they are out in public anymore. I can't even find my father and he should have been the easiest to find because of his work."

I didn't know what to say, but I did recall my father's tale of being faced with a similar scenario when my mother left him. Even using his contacts in the police force, he had been unable to trace her until she was ready to be found. By then she'd taken me across three state lines and had settled in Arizona.

When it was time to close up, I held Edward's hand all the way to my truck and then on the drive home too. That day was the first without rain in a while, but he didn't wrinkle his nose when we climbed the steps to my apartment so maybe something was working in his favour.

After reheating the last portion of frozen lasagne, I poured myself a glass of red wine and sat down beside Edward at the kitchen table. He looked lost.

Once I'd pulled out the sofabed, washed and changed, I steered Edward into bed and lay down beside him. Fifteen minutes later, my brain was still going nineteen to the dozen.

"Edward, are you still awake?" I whispered.

"Yes, Bella. I never sleep."

"Why haven't you fed from me since… you know?"

"I don't want to kill you, Bella."

"Oh. Thanks, I guess."

I felt the back of his hand brush mine under the covers. His hand was freezing cold so I held it, hoping my warmth might to be of some comfort to him.

"Thank you, Bella, for allowing me to stay." He rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand.

I rolled my head to the side to find he was already looking at me. "Well, you are still under contract until November 1st."

"The contract ends at midnight on the 31st of October."

"If I keep you past midnight, will you turn into a pumpkin?" I bit my bottom lip and raised my eyebrows.

He smirked at me. "No, but you might."

I snuggled closer and closed my eyes, breathing him in. I didn't want him to leave at the end of the month – or ever.

…

The apartment was dark when he shook me awake. Coming out of a deep sleep so abruptly had my mind playing nasty tricks on me, making me think he wanted to feed again. I was to be disappointed.

"Put these on, Bella," he said, placing some clothes on the bed. "I need you to be warm."

I gathered up the clothes and stumbled to the bathroom, relieving myself and splashing cold water over my face before I pulled on the jeans, T-shirt, sweater and thick socks.

When I came out, Edward helped me into my boots and wrapped me up in my red velvet cloak. He opened the front door and, after letting me out first, locked up and put the keys in his coat pocket.

At the bottom of the steps, he crouched down in front of me.

"Climb on my back and tuck your cloak in tight, Little Red Riding Bella."

I snorted and did as he said, still a little too drowsy to argue. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist and pressed my right cheek to his left. He made a low humming sound.

"Close your eyes," he whispered as he gripped my thighs and straightened his legs to stand.

"Why?"

"You don't want to believe what I am so maybe it's better if you don't see anything that might shatter your delusions."

He moved slowly at first, a smooth and gentle jog along the quiet city streets until we reached the trees on either side of the creek.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Close your eyes, Bella!"

Cold air whipped at my face as he picked up speed and, without my sight, familiar scents and sounds, each of them reminiscent of home, teased my other senses.

After a while, Edward slowed and came to a halt. I could smell a change in the air and I could hear the gentle lap of a calm sea.

"Drop your legs, Bella," Edward whispered, "but don't let go of me just yet."

My feet landed on something soft. I felt him turn in my arms, which were still around his neck. His hands gripped my waist, supporting me, giving me time to regain my equilibrium.

"You can open your eyes now," he said.

It was still dark but in the cloud obscured moonlight, I was able to make out the shapes of the large rocks to one side of us.

"Where are we?"

"We're on the other side of the peninsula," he said.

"Why did you bring me here?"

"I like it here and I want you to know a little of my world as it once was. Not so long ago, these brief periods of time between dawn and sunrise, sunset and dusk, were when I felt most at ease with what I am and most comfortable in your world."

He held my gaze in the way he had that time at the kitchen table on the first day he fed from me. I couldn't look away from him as he removed his hands from my waist to slowly unbutton his coat and then his shirt, exposing the bare skin of his chest.

We stood in silence for the half hour it took for the sun to rise and as it neared its completion, Edward's skin began to take on a luminescent glow. Little by little, the glow became something more. Sunlight refracted and reflected off his skin as if it were composed entirely of tiny crystals.

"Good grief, Edward! What on earth have you put on your skin? It looks like you've been rolling around in glitter?"

He dropped his head and looked down at his feet. I wanted to kick myself. The man had obviously put a lot of thought and effort into his presentation and my reaction had been hurtful.

I raised my hand and brushed my fingers over one of his cheeks but when I inspected my fingertips, they showed no trace of whatever sparkly substance he'd used.

Taking a step back, I studied him. Something inside me tightened on the left side of my chest. Beautiful was not sufficient enough to describe him; resplendent was far more fitting.

I stepped forward and put my face under his, smiling up at him. "Edward," I whispered, "you are dazzling!"

His arms wrapped around me and I was lifted off my feet and twirled around on the empty beach.

When he set me down again, I asked, "You don't happen to have any sunglasses on you, do you?"

"Come on," he said, taking my hand. He led me to a shady cave and sat down on the sand, tugging at my arm. "It's quite dry," he said.

And so we sat side by side, leaning back on our hands, looking out at the horizon.

"What do you see when you look at me, Bella?" Edward asked in a low whisper.

"Inside or out?" The normal volume of my voice reverberated around the cave.

"I like that about you," he whispered. "You might be in denial about what I am, but I suspect even if you weren't, you would still see past the surface."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You'd be surprised how superficial people are, nowadays in particular. Once, it was just my physical appearance, but now there is the added attraction of what I am."

"What makes you think I'm any different from the rest?"

"Your actions."

I smirked. "Not my thoughts?"

"You believe I can read minds now?"

"I know you can't or you'd know exactly what I see when I look at you."

"And that is?"

"A good man. You're kind, considerate and caring. You even cook for me. No one has ever done that before."

"How can you be so sure I'm not just feeding my pet human?"

I looked at him, waiting for a smile or a twitch at the corner of his mouth, but he wasn't giving anything away. Two could play at that game.

"You could be, I guess. That would make sense, keeping your food source well nourished, but I don't believe that's what you've been doing. The things you've done, the way you've acted, it's almost as if…"

I looked out into the distance at a fishing boat, bobbing about on the sea. I didn't want to hear myself finish that sentence and, fortunately, he didn't push me to.

"You should know, Bella, that your blood is the most delicious I've ever tasted. That is reason enough to want to prolong the supply as long as possible."

"I'm not frightened of you," I said, laughing.

"Oh, but you should be." He leaned in and gnashed his teeth together right by my ear, sending a shiver of delight down my spine.

"How many pet humans have you had?" I asked.

He was silent for a while before he spoke. "None. I've never sucked a human's blood and stopped – until you."

"How many have died?"

"Too many. To my shame, there was a short period in the early part of the last century when I preyed on what I deemed to be the dregs of society. It didn't satisfy more than my baser instincts, though, so I returned to my family and lived on a diet of animal blood, hunting my prey in the wild. None of us wish to kill humans in order to maintain our existence."

He sat up, drew up his knees and put his fingers on the ground between his feet, drawing circles in the sand.

"When society changed," he said, "when it became acceptable to be what I am without guile or artifice, my family was over the moon. They had been living on the periphery, hiding in the shadows for so long, they couldn't wait to be fully received back into the world of the living.

"Until then, our lives had been such that in order to live among humans, we could never remain more than a few years in one place. Whenever people started to notice we weren't aging, we had to move. We could not form connections or attachments. We could not become emotionally involved.

"Everyone was happy with the changes, except for me. Boys and girls had always been attracted to me physically, I knew that, but none of them were interested in me as a person. Now, with the added allure of knowing what I am, I have become no more than the most desirable of accessories."

"So why put yourself up for hire?" I whispered.

"I didn't."


	10. Forerunner

**10\. Forerunner**

The trouble with living a lie is that in order to successfully convince others, one must first convince oneself. Eventually, it becomes impossible to remember what is fact and what is fiction.

Part of me wanted to believe Edward's stories, to believe everything he'd said was true. He seemed so genuine in his delivery, but it was all an act, paid for in full, discount excepted. Even the disappearance of the store and his family could have been a fabrication, part of the experience I was meant to enjoy.

And yet I couldn't help but feel there were elements of truth in some of the things he had told me. If only I could see past the vampiric embellishments to find them.

Lost in thought, I got to my feet and walked out of the cave into the open. The clouds were drawing in. It would rain soon. I scanned the coastline, studying the shapes of the rocks and the small island that appeared to be floating in the sea.

"I know this beach," I said. "My dad lives near here."

"Would you like to go and visit him?" Edward asked, coming out to join me, his fingers deftly refastening all but the top two buttons of his shirt.

I hadn't seen or spoken to my father in several weeks. He didn't use the phone anymore, not even on my birthday. I hesitated, weighing up the pros and cons of introducing my dad to my vampire escort. That could take some explaining.

"He might not be in," I said, hedging.

Edward shrugged and buttoned up his coat. "Then I'll run you back home. It's not a problem, Bella."

He bent his knees and I climbed onto his back, once again wrapping myself around him and tucking in my cloak. I pressed my nose into his neck. He smelled wonderful for being outside, or maybe it was down to his earlier exertions. Either way, it was very appealing.

"Do you know the way to Forks from here?" I asked.

His lips brushed against my forehead when he answered. "I do. You can close your eyes."

A few minutes later, he set me down at the edge of the forest on the south side of town. We walked the rest of the way, neither of us wanting to draw any undue attention to ourselves by piggybacking through the streets in broad daylight, although pedestrians weren't exactly a day to day occurrence either.

When we arrived at my father's house, we stood out front for a few minutes while I inspected the state of it.

The roof was still in good order but the paintwork on the clapboards and window frames was beginning to look shabby and flakey. I should have seen about fixing that over the summer when the weather was better, but I hadn't.

The front yard was so untidy and overgrown, I dreaded to think what the backyard might be like.

As we walked up the empty driveway, I reached into Edward's coat pocket for my keys, flipping them around the ring until I was holding the correct ones at the ready. We climbed the steps and I unlocked the door.

The house was cold and musty inside as if it hadn't been heated or aired since my last visit. There was a faint glimmer of flickering light coming from the living room and when I turned the corner, there was my dad sitting in his recliner, watching a game.

Something about him was off. He looked somehow less there than usual.

"Hello, Dad," I said.

"Bella?" He shifted in his seat. "About time you came to visit your old man. I was beginning to think you'd forgotten me."

"Yeah, I know. I've left it too long again."

"Who's this?" he asked, pushing himself up out of the chair.

Edward stepped forward and offered his right hand for my father to shake. "My name is Edward Cullen, sir," he said, but my dad did not reciprocate.

"Edward," I said, "this is my dad, Chief Swan."

"Charlie," my dad said, frowning at me. "I'm not the Chief anymore, Bells. Haven't been for a long time."

My dad turned back to Edward and looked him up and down. He might not have been the Chief of Police anymore, but old habits were seemingly hard to break.

"Does she know?" he asked.

"She does," Edward replied, casting a brief glance at me, "but she won't accept it."

"Do you like baseball, Edward?"

"Yes, sir."

"Make yourself comfortable then."

Edward took off his coat and draped it over the back of the couch. They both sat down and turned their attention to the television.

"I'm going to get a coffee and something to eat," I said. "Do you want anything, Dad?"

"I'd love a beer," he said.

"You can't have one. You know that. Edward?"

"No, thank you, Bella."

I unfastened my cloak and hung it on a hook in the hall. On my way into the kitchen, I turned the dial on the thermostat up several degrees. I peered into the food cabinet. There wasn't much in it aside from a can of tomato soup, some peanut butter and a jar of instant coffee, which I set on the counter.

I put the kettle on the stove to boil and walked over to the refrigerator. That was empty bar a few bottles of water, half a stick of butter and a bottle of maple syrup.

The freezer was well stocked by comparison. I pulled out the top drawer, took out one of my homemade breakfast burritos and put it on a plate in the microwave to reheat it.

While I sat at the kitchen table eating my breakfast, I could hear my dad and Edward moaning and groaning at the television. Then they fell silent. After a few minutes, my dad must have asked a question because I could hear what I assumed was Edward's response.

"If she'll let me," he said, and then a moment later, "To answer that would risk something that I'm not prepared to lose, Charlie."

"That's good enough for me," my dad said and then their attention must have been taken up by the game again.

I was washing my plate and mug at the sink when Edward came into the kitchen, wearing his coat and holding his boots. He had an odd expression on his face.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"I'll just be outside," he said, leaving the room. I heard the key turning in the lock on the back door and then the door shutting behind him.

Frowning, I fetched my cloak from the hall and walked into the living room. "Everything okay, Dad?" I asked.

"Fine, Bella," he said, but he didn't take his eyes off the television screen.

"I'm sorry, Dad," I said. "I'm just going outside to see what's up with Edward."

"No problem, Bells."

Edward was sitting on the back steps, looking out across the yard toward the forest. It had started to drizzle so I pulled my cloak around me and sat down, putting my hand on his arm.

"You must know," he said, looking at me.

"Know what?"

"About your father."

"What about my father?"

He stood up and took my hand. "Let's take a little walk, shall we?"

He led me across the grass and into the forest, the former so overgrown it merged almost seamlessly into the latter. Once we were beyond the tree line, he crouched down in front of me.

"Hop on," he said.

"Where are we going?"

"Not very far."

He only ran a short distance, but I didn't like where he stopped one bit. Once he'd set me down on the short grass, I clenched my fists and glared up at him.

"Why have you brought me here?" I asked, my throat tightening.

He took a gentle hold of my upper arm and guided me through the stones. I just about managed to put one foot in front of the other, even though my feet felt like lead weights.

When we finally came to a halt, I looked anywhere and everywhere but at the gravestone in front of us.

Edward moved to stand behind me, his hands resting on my shoulders. "Look at it, Bella."

Reading the words that were neatly carved into the upright, grey stone made me wish I hadn't eaten any breakfast. All I wanted to do was vomit.

"Come on, Bella," he murmured, his mouth right by my ear. "Read out the second date for me."

"16 September, 2005," I whispered. "But this isn't real. He's still here and has been all along. How else could he have pointed a gun at Mike's crotch for leaving a used condom on the floor of my truck?"

"He did?" Edward sounded impressed. "I'm beginning to understand why he felt the need to stick around."

The light drizzle was slowly turning into rain. I pulled my hood up over my head and held the fronts of my cloak together.

With his hands still on my shoulders, Edward steered me over to a wooden bench at the side of the cemetery, still within sight of the gravestone. I sat down on the wet seat and he squatted in front of me, resting his hands on my knees, waiting for me to make eye contact before he spoke again.

"The man I just met is a ghost, Bella. Your father died seven years ago."

I shook my head and blinked a few times, refusing to look at him. He moved to sit beside me, but I stood up and paced back and forth in front of the bench, not caring that my cloak was flapping open, leaving me more exposed to the rain.

I didn't recognise my own voice when I started talking. How I wished it wasn't me.

"He was almost solid for the first year," I said. "I could feel him when he hugged me then, but he's faded over time. Strange really. It's as if the less I need him, the fainter he becomes.

"I knew." I laughed wryly. "Of course, I knew. I was the one who found him dead in his bed when he should have been at the station already, drinking his morning coffee. I was there at the wake and I was here for the burial, but I didn't want to accept it. I couldn't. I'd only just got him back in my life and he'd gone."

Edward stood up and tried to wrap his arms around me, but I turned my back on him, my hood falling down as I did so, and walked away.

"I was still in high school when it happened. I'd just turned eighteen so I didn't need a legal guardian. He'd left me the house in his will. He'd left me everything. He'd been prepared for such an eventuality – expected it even.

"People offered to stay with me in the house or for me to stay with them, but I wanted to be alone. When everyone had gone and I'd locked the door, I went to bed and cried for I don't know how long.

"Then one evening, I came downstairs and walked into the lounge, and there he was, sitting in his recliner watching the ballgame."

My face was wet with the rain. I wiped a finger under each eye and turned back around. Edward hadn't moved. He was still standing with his arms out ready for me, his wet hair flattened to his head. I focussed on his amber eyes as the first tear rolled down my cheek.

"I didn't tell anyone. To all intents and purposes, I was living alone, finishing high school. People started to comment on how well I was doing, but I also heard their whispers. It was only a matter of time before reality would knock me back down again. No one could handle a bereavement the way I was handling it.

"But I carried on as usual and my dad supported me through it all, just as any dad would. He told me what to do when the faucet wouldn't stop dripping. He told me how and when to change the oil on my truck. He congratulated me on my acceptance to university and sat with me while I filled out the paperwork for financial support."

"No one else knew?" Edward asked.

"No," I said, taking a step toward him.

"But when your father pointed his gun at Mike…"

"I saw him. Mike didn't." I shook my head. "I wouldn't admit it to anyone. I couldn't."

"Not even Angela? From what you've told me, she would have understood."

I took another step forward. "She was the last person I could tell."

"And he's still here."

"Yes."

"Waiting around for you to come and visit him."

"Yes." Tears were streaming down my face. "I have to come to him. He can't leave Forks, and he can't pick up the phone anymore."

"Why aren't you living here with him?"

I let out a sob. "He told me I had to live a normal life and that included leaving home. But my life isn't normal, is it?"

He frowned. "I don't understand, Bella. If you've known what your father is all this time, why have you denied the existence of creatures like me?"

"Because to accept that the supernatural exists would mean having to accept he's dead, Edward, and I can't. I won't. I don't want him to go."

He pulled me into his arms and held me tight against his chest. "Oh, Bella. You are putting yourself and your father through hell."

* * *

 **A Big Thank You to** SarcasticBimbo for featuring this story on her blog, Smut Sluts and Angst Whores.


	11. Dispel

**11\. Dispel**

The run back in the rain with my eyes wide open would have been exhilarating had it not been for the lead weight in the pit of my stomach.

We slipped our muddy boots off on the back step and Edward took my wet cloak so I could run upstairs to towel dry my hair. When I came back down, he was in the living room talking with my dad. As soon as I entered, he got up and left the room.

"Hey, Dad," I said, sitting down next to him. I laid my forearm on the arm of the couch and watched him put his hand on top mine. There was no weight to it, only an extra chill on my already cold skin.

I plastered a smile on my face. "All this time, Dad, and you never told me you were a ghost."

He huffed. "Bella, you came to the funeral. The whole town was there. You've known what I am all along; you've just refused to acknowledge it."

"Why did you stay?"

"I believe everyone gets the opportunity to wait around a little after they've died, to finish things up or something like that." He sighed. "You were virtually catatonic for three months, Bella, and no one seemed capable of bringing you out of it. I couldn't leave you like that. You needed me. Harry suggested I show myself and see what happened."

"Harry Clearwater?"

"Yep. You remember my old fishing buddy?"

"But he's…"

"Dead, yes. He's around here somewhere." He looked toward the window then back at our hands. "Anyway, I showed myself to you and you took one look at me and said, 'Hello Dad,' and went and put the dinner on. It was the first time you'd cooked yourself a hot meal since I'd died."

"And you stayed."

"It's what any parent would do for their child."

"Not all parents." My mother hadn't even come to his funeral.

He patted my hand, not that I could feel it. "You started to live again – do normal teenage things. You even dated that idiot Mike Newton for a while." His expression hardened for a moment. "You graduated high school, went off to university, got your degree, and now you're earning a living, supporting yourself. I'm very proud of you, Bella."

He looked out of the window again. "But… you know, I'd really like to go fishing with Harry. He's been waiting for me for seven years – says I'm his unfinished business – and he hasn't been too subtle about it either. He's scared the life out of Sue on numerous occasions. If I don't distract him soon, she'll be joining us before her time."

His effort to make light of the situation was wasted on me. Inside my head and chest, I was right back at the beginning when I found him dead from a heart attack.

"Mom should have left me with you all along," I said. "I'd barely got you back and you…"

"Come on, Bells. Say the word."

"You died," I whispered.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

"So you should be," I said, half laughing through my tears.

"You already know the house is yours. You could live in it now if you want to."

"But you won't be in it anymore."

"In your heart and mind but not here. I'll be fishing with Harry in the hereafter."

My dad got to his feet and I joined him. He put his arms around me and although I knew he was hugging me, I could only draw on the memory of how it used to feel.

"Say goodbye to me, Bella," he said.

"Can't we have just a little longer?"

"You've had seven years more than you should have."

Tears were streaming down my face as I closed my eyes. "Goodbye, Dad."

Two strong arms wrapped around me from behind. I leaned back into Edward and dared to open my eyes and look at the empty space in front of me.

"Did I imagine that?" I whispered.

"No," Edward said. "I was here. I saw and heard everything you did."

"But what if you're not real either?"

He squeezed a little tighter and said, "I should have known you wouldn't make it easy for me."

He was wrong, of course. It wasn't him I made things difficult for, it was myself.

Edward must have sensed my body going limp as a wave of emotion took hold of me because he scooped me up and sat on the couch with me on his lap, holding me to his chest. I cried myself to sleep in his arms.

When I awoke, the house was dark and I was freezing cold. Edward was exceptionally still. Too still. Something wasn't right.

Without thinking, I brought my right hand up and dipped my fingers under the placket of his shirt, encountering the fine hairs on his chest. His skin was ice cold, considering it had been hours since our excursion to the cemetery. I undid some buttons and placed my palm flat against his chest. His rib cage suddenly expanded and he made a humming noise.

I sighed in relief. "You weren't breathing," I whispered.

"I don't need to."

I pressed my ear to his chest. "I can't hear your heart."

"No. It's been silent for almost a hundred years."

I frowned. "And you haven't gotten any warmer for being indoors all this time."

"No, Bella."

I started to shiver. "You're the reason I'm so cold!"

"Come on, then," he said, lifting me off his lap. "We'd better warm you up."

I sat quietly at my dad's kitchen table, staring at the grain of the wood while Edward emptied the can of tomato soup into a pan to warm it through and dug around in the freezer drawers until he found the sliced bread and shredded cheese.

"I'm very glad you're here," I said eventually, not even allowing myself to consider the whys and wherefores.

He placed the hot soup and the grilled cheese sandwich down on the table in front of me along with a bottle of water and pulled out a chair to join me.

"You are very welcome," he said.

I ate slowly, my mind jumping from one thing to another until I'd eaten all I could manage.

"You were wrong about me," I said, pushing my plate and bowl toward the centre of the table. "I'm not the virtuous person you think I am. I don't look past the surface because I'm non-judgemental, I look past it so don't have to see it for what it is."

He shook his head, a half smile on his lips. "Even if I were just a man, Bella, you'd still ignore my appearance."

I sniffed. "I am not completely unobservant, Edward, neither am I unaffected, but I am well aware that external beauty is only skin deep."

"Which proves my point."

I sighed. "I've been unfair to you. I've found reasons and explanations to disprove everything you've said or done that doesn't fit with my idea of reality. I've told myself over and over that it's all pretend, an act put on in order to honour that damned rental agreement, but now I'm not so sure."

"It's alright, Bella. I knew what you were doing."

"Because you read my mind?"

"No." He frowned. "I can't read your mind."

"Ha! So I _was_ right."

"Only partially. I've been able to read every mind I've ever encountered with the exception of one: yours."

There was me trying to make sense of everything and he had to go and throw another cat among the pigeons.

"Did your family really desert you?" I asked.

"Yes, and they did a thorough job of it too. They haven't just disappeared off the face of the earth, they've blocked my personal finances."

"What?"

"It's okay, Bella. It's inconvenient but it's not as if I'll go hungry or die of hypothermia."

"You might run out of clothes, though, if you keep on chasing mountain lions."

"True." A small smile graced his face.

"When we were in the cave, you said you didn't put yourself up for hire." He shook his head. "So how did you come to arrive on my doorstep?"

He lay his hands flat on the table and tapped out a rhythm with his fingers. "It happened within a matter of twenty-four hours," he said. "I rarely pay heed to my sister when she whines so I was only listening with half an ear when she complained that one of her escorts was going to let her down at the last minute.

"I recall Jasper suggesting one of us could stand in if her client would accept a replacement. I was so preoccupied with what I was doing, I just nodded my assent, vaguely aware that my father and other brother had also agreed to the plan."

"What were you doing?"

"Setting up a highly convoluted domino race."

I raised both eyebrows. He shrugged.

"The next afternoon, my sister returned home and announced that her client had chosen me. Emmett didn't take it well." One corner of his mouth crept up into a lopsided grin. "He broke Esme's coffee table and stormed out of the house.

"My sister then thrust a sheet of paper under my nose for a few seconds – a copy of the contract with all your details on it – and then made me sit through a food nutrition video while she packed my bag for me."

"So that's why you didn't bring any pyjamas or underpants with you."

"No, Bella," he said seriously, his eyes fixed on mine. "I have no use for pyjamas and I never wear underpants."

I took a swig of cool water from my bottle. I was beginning to feel much warmer.

"When I was about to leave," he said, "she insisted I drink some donated human blood and that is how my eyes came to be red when I arrived at your apartment."

"What colour were they before that?"

"A bit more golden than they are now. It's the animal blood that makes them that way."

"Oh." I frowned, thinking through everything he'd just told me for a moment. "You know, Edward, I booked you the very same day you arrived."

He propped one elbow on the table and leaned his head on his hand, but the expression on his face was blank.

"Your family set you up, didn't they?" I said.

"It certainly looks that way, yes."

I felt a knot forming in my stomach. "Were they playing a game of a chance with my life?"

"Quite possibly."

"Were you, too?"

"Yes. No. I don't know, Bella. I cannot believe that's what my sister would have intended. She has forced my hand but she has done it in a very specific way. There has to be a reason behind it."

"Forced your hand?" My voice was shrill. " Are you saying she chose me for you?"

"That is beyond even her capabilities, but I do believe she envisioned you and me together somehow."

"Envisioned?"

"My sister can see into the future."

…

Edward told me later that I had blacked out. Fortunately, he'd been able to catch me before I'd slid off my chair and underneath the kitchen table. He had cleared up, turned down the thermostat, unplugged the television and locked the house before taking a circuitous route through the forest, with me bundled up in his arms, back to Port Angeles.

I came to shortly after he'd laid me on the sofa in my apartment. He was taking off my boots. He insisted I take a hot shower and I was too exhausted to argue with him.

My bed was ready when I came out of the bathroom but Edward was nowhere in sight. I slipped under the covers and let sleep take me wherever it would.

…

When I opened my eyes next, Edward was lying on his side facing me, fiddling with a lock of my hair. His irises were a thin golden ring around his large black pupils.

My apartment had that dull glow about it of brilliant sunshine shining through the fabric of the curtains.

"What's the time?" My voice was hoarse and my throat dry.

"A little past one."

I scrubbed a hand over my face, using a fingernail to scratch the sleep from the corner of one eye. I covered my mouth as I yawned and then groaned.

"I have so much to do and so little time," I said.

"What needs doing?"

"The laundry."

"Aside from the bedding, the laundry is done."

I raised an eyebrow. "Grocery shopping?"

"I went to the grocery store before the sun broke through the clouds. I hope you don't mind that I took your wallet from your purse."

I shook my head, more than curious to check out the food cabinet and the refrigerator to see what he'd bought.

"All you have to do is eat your lunch and cook for the freezer," he said.

"And the bedding and the cleaning?"

"I can do those."

"I don't recall seeing housework listed in the small print," I said. "Why are you doing all this?"

"Does it matter?"

"It does to me."

"Can't you just thank me and let me get on with it?"

I stared at him.

He blew out a cool, sweet breath. "The contract said you had to house me, not run around after me like a servant, Bella. I'm happy to do my share."

"Still, not even my own mother was this domesticated, and as for my father…"

He cupped my cheek in his hand, wiping a lone tear away with his thumb, and then he pulled me to him. His shirt was unbuttoned at the neck, so I pressed my nose to his skin and took a deep breath. If I hadn't needed to empty my bladder, I'd have been happy to stay right there for the rest of the day.

"Thank you, Edward," I whispered brushing the underside of his jaw with my lips.

I eased myself out of his arms and got out of bed, half walking, half stumbling toward the bathroom. I hadn't gotten around to writing my shopping list the day before so I hoped he'd noticed that we'd nearly run out of toilet paper.


	12. Revamp

**12\. Revamp**

They say you learn something new every day, but what they don't tell you is that sometimes that knowledge comes at the price of one's dignity.

Edward didn't even try to contain his laughter when I called out for his assistance. After a few choice words from me, however, he did at least have the decency to leave a box of tissues outside the bathroom door before making a return visit to the grocery store.

How was I supposed to know that vampires don't utilise every piece of sanitaryware in the bathroom? Or had I been sold a lie as a justification for neglecting to purchase an item of such importance?

On his return, he stripped the bed and took the sheets downstairs to Mrs C's laundry room while I ate the lunch he'd prepared for me. I was rummaging through the refrigerator when he came back in, the cool draft of air helping to subdue the remains of the blush on my cheeks.

"What am I supposed to be cooking?" I asked.

"I got you the ingredients for a stew," he said, coming up behind me and leaning his chin on my shoulder. "See? Beef, carrots, celery and stock, plus potatoes and onions in your vegetable basket."

I frowned at the large plastic tray of beef. "Why am I still eating so much red meat when you have no intention of feeding from me again?"

His retreat was immediate. "I'll make a start on the bathroom," he said, leaving me torn between two types of heat: embarrassment at the thought of him cleaning a toilet he'd said he'd never used and frustration that he hadn't answered my question.

Gritting my teeth, I gathered up my ingredients and turned around to place them on the counter. There in the middle of it was a packet of bread mix.

Once the stew was simmering on the stove, I prepared the bread dough to make some dinner rolls. It couldn't have been by coincidence that while I was kneading the dough to within an inch of its life, Edward was pushing the noisy vacuum cleaner around with a smug grin on his face.

Despite having slept until lunchtime, I was ready for bed by eight o'clock. Maybe it was the two glasses of wine I'd had with my stew or maybe it was emotional exhaustion from knowing I would never see my dad again.

My father's house in Forks was empty and so was I.

…

Tuesday was a quiet day in the store, as much because it was my turn to play zombie as it was down to the lack of customers. Wind and rain either sent them in off the streets or deterred them from venturing out in the first place.

I sat at my desk, staring into space until Mike broke the comfortable silence by pushing open the door. I scanned the store. Edward was nowhere in sight.

"Would you look at that," Mike said, turning back to the window as he shrugged off his waterproof. The price tags were still dangling from one of the front pockets.

I looked out of the window. The rain was coming down so heavily, I could barely make out the trash can on the far edge of the sidewalk.

Mike hung his coat on the coat stand by the door and, while I watched the rainwater run down to form a puddle on the floor below it, he strode over to the battered leather armchair beside my desk, his boots leaving a wet trail behind him.

He pulled a squashed sandwich out of his blazer pocket and peeled back the plastic wrapping. The smell of peanut butter was unmistakable.

"Aren't you eating, Bella?" He took a large bite and started chewing noisily, his tongue peeking out to wipe a smear of the spread off his bottom lip.

"I'm not hungry," I said, fiddling with the cuff on the sleeve of my sweater. I had been worrying it all morning, slowly stretching it out of shape.

Mike's hand landed on mine. "Don't do that," he said gently.

I looked up at his face and my throat tightened. That particular expression of concern brought back painful memories.

"I haven't seen you do that since after your dad…" he whispered. His eyebrows drew close together, forming a dent at the bridge of his nose. "What's wrong, Bella? Has he left you?"

"Yes," I said, choking back my tears. "He said it was time I let him go."

"I'll kill him!" he said, thumping a fist down on my desk, startling me.

"But he's dead already."

"I know that but there are ways to finish the job properly."

"You can't kill a ghost, Mike."

"A ghost? Who's talking about ghosts?"

"You are!"

He jumped out of his seat. "Edward might be pale but he is not a ghost."

"Oh. Oh!"

I'd been so lost in my misery, I hadn't been thinking straight. Mike didn't know about my dad because I hadn't told him. I hadn't told anyone.

I stood up and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Mike?" He turned to look at me. "I'm talking about my dad, about coming to terms with… Accepting his death."

A tear rolled down my face and Mike's gaze softened. "Oh, Bella." He shook his head. "You've been stuck for so long and we've been so worried for you. We thought you'd never…" He put his hand over the one I'd placed on his shoulder and squeezed it.

"We?"

"Angela and I. And Jake, too, I guess, although he didn't know you back then."

I frowned at him, too numb to fully process what he was saying.

At that moment, Mike's assistant poked her head around the door. She was wearing a long, yellow, rubberised fisherman's coat, the tags hanging from the pocket. The hood covered most of her face and it occurred to me that all she needed was an axe and she'd be set for Halloween.

"Mike?" she said. "Your mom's on the phone. She needs your help with an order. It's the third time she's called in ten minutes."

I'd worked for Mrs Newton when I was in high school. She wasn't the sort of woman one kept waiting.

"Will you be okay?" Mike said, squeezing my hand again.

"I might just be, yeah," I said giving him a watery smile.

He leaned in and kissed my cheek. Then he grabbed his waterproof and followed his assistant next door.

"He's right, you know," Edward said, coming out from his hiding place in among the bookcases. "I am dead already."

"You don't look it," I said, drying my eyes with my sleeve.

"Appearances can be deceptive."

I walked around my desk and sat down. "So, what would it take to polish you off? A silver bullet?"

He laughed. "That's a werewolf, Bella, but any kind of bullet would do the job if you were lucky enough to hit the right spot. They're not the easiest of targets though. They are wily creatures and quite fast."

"Hmm. A wooden stake through the heart and, um, off with your head?"

"Myth."

"Holy water?"

"Myth"

"Garlic?"

He smirked and shook his head. Were that a possibility, he'd have expired the minute he smelled my cooking.

"So what then?"

"As if I'd tell you," he said.

"Going by the fact that Mike seems to know, I'd hazard a guess the rest of the world is already in on your little secret. Why should I be left out of the loop?"

"Fire, Bella," he said grudgingly. "Dismemberment and incineration."

"Nasty," I said, looking at the rain lashing against the window. "Good thing we live somewhere where it rains all the time, then."

…

There was little chance of Edward combusting on his way to fetch my truck because the deluge was relentless.

I locked the front door and waited for him under the tiny overhang in an effort to stay dry. When he drew up and opened the passenger side door, I made a dash for it, chucking my purse onto the bench seat before launching myself inside. The poor man was drenched to the skin, his hair dark, wet and dripping.

He drove with such caution, it took twice the usual time to get home. He insisted I stay in the truck until he had unlocked the apartment door and come back for me.

I couldn't see beyond the hood, so I was startled when the truck door opened beside me. Edward smiled as he scooped me up and whisked me up the steps at lightening speed. I'd barely had the chance to enjoy being held in his arms before he had deposited me on the ground and removed my wet cloak.

While he disappeared into the bathroom, I reheated a portion of stew and sat at the kitchen table to eat it, tearing pieces off a bread roll to mop up the gravy at the end.

"Mike was genuinely concerned for you today," Edward said, walking out of the bathroom, wearing the same clothes he'd worn in. His damp hair was sticking out in all directions.

"No lascivious thoughts?" I asked.

"Not one. He didn't even get excited at the prospect of my departure. It would seem he cannot bear to see you hurting."

"He was angry at you."

"Yes."

"But had you gone, he'd have gotten over that anger pretty quickly and upped his efforts to make me his."

"Undoubtedly."

It saddened me to think Mike had been waiting around so long for someone whose heart he could never hope to win.

I finished my glass of wine and pushed away from the table. I washed and dried the dishes and went to join Edward on the sofa. He was holding the Rent-A-Vampire brochure in his hands, looking at the picture of the three male members of his family laughing together.

"Where did you find that?" I asked.

"It was in your purse," he said.

"Oh." I hoped the fact I still had it hadn't upset him. I hadn't actually looked at it since I'd signed the contract. "Do you miss them?"

"A little, yes."

"The woman in the store…"

"Alice, my sister."

"She said that man is her father. Is he really yours too?"

"Yes. His name is Carlisle."

"Odd name."

"He's English."

I frowned. Nothing added up. "She said he is twenty-three."

"Yes, give or take three hundred and fifty years."

I blew out a breath. "And you're… What was it? Seventeen?" I laughed. "Give or take?"

He smirked but his good humour did not last. He leaned back into the sofa and closed his eyes.

"My parents died of Spanish Influenza within a few days of each other," he said.

"Oh, Edward!" I put a hand on his thigh and he was swift to cover it with one of his own.

"My own health had deteriorated so much," he said, "I was not even aware that my mother had gone. If it hadn't been for Carlisle, I would have surely joined them, but I survived, in manner of speaking."

Considering the chill that ran through my body at his words, I should not have felt compelled to inch along the sofa toward him until our sides were touching.

"For the first year, I was so consumed by the bloodlust, I didn't even begin to mourn for them." His breathing faltered for a moment and then evened out again. "Then, once I'd found some sense of balance…"

"I'm sorry," I said, failing to blink back my tears. "That must have been…"

He lifted me onto his lap and positioned me just as he had at my father's house. I tucked my head under his chin.

"It gets easier, Bella, over time. Especially now that you've said goodbye. It's perverse really. We hold on to them so tightly, we can't feel anything but the pain of losing them. Once we let them go, we find them everywhere, even within ourselves, and there is some comfort in that."

I tilted my head up and pressed my lips to the underside of his jaw. He squeezed me briefly and continued to talk, the reverberations in his chest as soothing as the sound of his voice. And for once, I did not try to explain away his story.

"Carlisle has treated me like his son ever since he made me what I am. The age difference might not be much in human years, but, as vampires go, his knowledge and experience far exceeds mine, as does his compassion.

"He turned three more after me. He found the first, Esme, in the morgue, barely clinging to life. She became his wife and my second mother. Rosalie was next, left for dead in the street after a vicious assault. He intended her to be a mate for me."

It didn't take much of an imagination to understand the meaning of the word mate. I stiffened and pushed my hands against his chest, trying to climb off his lap, but he held me fast.

"Shhh," he said, stroking my hair. "If he'd been able to read my mind, he would have known I don't much care for vanity and far prefer brunettes to blondes.

"Rosalie brought her mate to him to change. She'd found Emmett in the forest, bleeding out from a bear attack, and carried him all the way home. He thought she was an angel." He snorted. "The fool."

I remembered thinking that of him when he'd first brought me a grilled cheese sandwich and a flask of tomato soup. Did that make me a fool too? I didn't think so. So long as he kept making that lunch every day, my opinion wouldn't change.

"Alice and Jasper joined us later," he said. "Alice had seen us and our way of life in a vision." He sniggered. "She adopted us, not the other way around. We had little choice in the matter. And Jasper, while he calls us family and is fiercely loyal, is next eldest to Carlisle and what he experienced in his first hundred years…"

…

I woke in the night tucked up in bed in my jeans and sweater, feeling entirely too hot for comfort. I reached out for Edward, patting his side of the bed, but it was empty.

Foggy with sleep, I threw off the covers, unfastened my jeans and wriggled out of them, kicking them onto the floor beside the bed. My sweater came off next, leaving me in just my tank top and panties.

As I shuffled across the bed onto the cooler sheets on Edward's side, I heard a soft groan coming from somewhere up above me, followed by the sound of a page turning.

Then, as I drifted off to sleep again, I felt a cool draft waft across my face.


	13. Switch

**13\. Switch**

Nothing had changed and yet everything had changed. I had no idea how I should be feeling. I'd kept myself on an even keel for so many years, allowing the emotions to the surface was almost unbearable.

I was grateful for the simple routine of the morning, for my breakfast of eggs, toast and orange juice, and for Edward wrapping me in my cloak, guiding me out of the front door and locking up behind us.

He drove us to the store, opened up, switched on the lights and put the kettle on for my coffee. It was as if he knew I needed someone to hold me steady until I could do it for myself.

But I didn't need things so steady that he had to keep wearing the same outfit three or more days in a row.

"Edward, did you forget to do your own laundry?" I asked as he set the cup down on my desk.

"No, Bella. I'm running out of clothes."

"How come?"

"A few things have gotten a little shredded."

I recalled one of our nonsensical moments of conversation from when we were sat at my dad's kitchen table and inspected him more closely. His navy blue shirt had a few holes in it and there were three parallel slashes, each about three inches long, in one of the legs of his jeans.

"You shouldn't worry about that. That's quite trendy."

"Indecent exposure is trendy? Are you sure?"

Had I been in my right mind, I would have surely found some surreptitious delight in the thought of Edward's clothes being so badly damaged that they revealed more than they covered or, even better, him having nothing left to wear at all.

As it was, I simply solved his problem by reaching for my purse, handing him my credit card and directing him to the thrift store. There was no point in buying brand new clothes if he wasn't going to look after them properly.

He stayed with me until shortly before midday, assuming I would have some company, but I ate my lunch alone. Mike must have either had a rare day off or his mother had called him back to the store in Forks.

Edward returned soon after one o'clock with a bag of clothing. A consignment of books had arrived while he was out so we spent the afternoon cataloguing and pricing them. It was methodical and it kept my mind occupied.

That evening, Edward left me preparing my evening meal while he went downstairs to wash his not so new clothes. Once I'd eaten, I took a long, hot shower and curled up in bed with a book, but I didn't recall reading any of it, or Edward's return, when I awoke on Thursday morning.

And despite a solid night's sleep, I still felt groggy.

Edward was making me a second cup of coffee when the bell above the door clanged. I came out of the Psychology section to greet the customer and stopped short.

Jacob had his body half in, half out of the doorway, his dark eyes scanning the shop. Outside, with her camera hanging around her neck and her face pressed against the glass, was Angela.

"Jacob?"

"Hey, Bella," he said, turning to me. "Wanna come for an early lunch with Angela and me?"

"What about Edward?" I asked.

He sniffed the air and wrinkled his nose. "He doesn't eat."

"That's beside the point, Jacob."

At that moment, Edward came into view, steaming cup of coffee in hand. He stopped short of my desk and stared at us, his face expressionless.

"Well?" I said, turning back to Jacob.

"Fine," Jacob said, dragging the word out.

As I turned around to ask Edward to join us, I realised something. The low Fall sun was shining in through the windows, brightening the full width of the front half of the store.

It had probably been doing that for some time because Edward had not been as forthcoming with the customers as he usually was. In fact, he had kept himself busy toward the back of the store.

He could go out – after all, the existence of supernatural creatures was well and truly out in the open so he didn't have to hide – but whether his skin was covered in makeup or naturally crystalline, he would light up like a Christmas tree and draw the very attention he seemed to strive to avoid.

Something about the whole scenario felt off to me. Why hadn't Angela come in to ask me herself? I hadn't seen her since my birthday. She usually dropped by every week or so, depending on her work schedule, and we would have a coffee in the bookstore, just the two of us. And she had never brought Jacob with her before.

"Edward," I said, "would you mind if I went for coffee with Angela?"

He nodded. "Go ahead, Bella. I can mind the store and keep Mike company when he arrives."

I grabbed my purse from behind the cash desk and pushed past a smirking Jacob, walking out into Angela's open arms. I gave her a hug and turned back to Jacob, checking he'd shut the door behind him.

"Consider yourself uninvited," I said, my voice low. "And don't even think of going back into my store while I'm not there."

"What? Why?"

"Something is amiss here, Jacob. I may not understand what you have against Edward but I know I don't like it."

His eyes shifted toward Edward, who was still standing by my desk, and then came back to me.

Angela looked torn, but we'd been friends too long. "Stay in the car, Jake," she said, handing him her keys. "I'll bring you a doggy bag."

She took my arm and we crossed the street to the coffee shop. We slipped into our favourite booth by the window so that we could keep an eye on Jacob. He was sitting in Angela's passenger seat, looking like a scolded puppy, with his arms folded in front of his chest and his face turned in our direction.

"He cares about you, you know," Angela said. "We all do."

There was that _we_ again. My friends obviously compared notes about me behind my back.

The waitress arrived and took our order – a black coffee for me, coffee and waffles for Angela, and a list as long as your arm of baked goods to go for Jacob.

"Mike came to see me yesterday," Angela said, fiddling with the sugar sachets.

"Ah," I said. That explained why I hadn't had the pleasure of his company at lunchtime.

"He told me what you said. I'm so relieved, Bella."

"You're relieved I've lost my dad?"

"I'm relieved you are finally coming to the end of your bereavement."

The waitress returned with our coffees. I watched Angela empty a sachet of sugar into hers and stir it in.

"Why didn't you tell me you were dating Jacob?" I asked.

"I didn't want to upset you," she said, setting the spoon down on the table.

I frowned. "You wouldn't have."

"Bella, I have been trying to draw you out of yourself for years. When your dad died, you cut us all off. You wouldn't talk to anyone. You wouldn't eat. You reacted so badly, I was terrified the next funeral I attended would be yours."

I looked down at my cup. If I was honest, I didn't recall much of that short period of my life other than the pain in my chest.

"Thankfully," Angela said, "things improved after a few months, but you were never really quite with us."

The waitress returned once more with a plate of waffles and a large, paper doggy bag, which she set on the end of the table. Angela pulled a face at her food and pushed it to one side.

"Mike tried to pull you out of it," she said. "He even thought he'd succeeded when you both got more involved, but then you broke it off."

"I hurt him."

"He knew it wasn't personal. He understood. You'd built a barricade around your heart. He just wasn't capable of tearing it down."

"Dammit, Angela. You're making me sound…"

"Like someone who lost their way in the woods?" She raised one eyebrow above the frame of her glasses.

I snorted. "Shouldn't you have sent along the Huntsman rather than the Big Bad Wolf?"

She smiled for a moment but then her expression changed. She leaned over the table and whispered. "The Huntsman found you anyway."

"What? Who?"

"You don't know? I thought Mike said he'd told you."

"Know what? Told me what?"

"Your new friend is a vampire," she whispered.

"So!" I leaned in and lowered my voice. "You like vampires. You've been drooling over them for years."

"That was before I learned the truth about them. He's not what you think he is, Bella. He's extremely dangerous. If he doesn't kill you, he'll make you into a murderer."

"I don't believe that," I said, shaking my head.

She sneered. "Of course you don't. How could I forget? You don't believe in the supernatural."

"I know him, Angela. You don't. And I can't believe after all this time, you're the one that's being prejudiced."

I looked out of the window at the sun sparkling on the glass of the bookstore opposite and my stomach turned. I'd left Edward on his own with half the store bathed in sunlight, including the cash desk. He'd be dazzling all the customers and hating every minute of it.

"I've got to go, Angela," I said, gathering up my things and sliding out of the booth.

"Bella?" she called, but I didn't turn back.

I rushed back across the street and pushed the door open, making the bell clang loudly.

"Only me," I said as I hung up my cloak.

I stowed my purse under the cash desk and turned to see Edward's smiling face appear from behind a bookcase. I forced a smile on my face and took my seat at my desk, tearing the paper off my grilled cheese sandwich and taking a huge bite.

"You didn't have to choose me over your friends," he said, coming to perch on the arm of the battered leather armchair beside my desk. "I heard what you said to Jacob."

I swallowed my mouthful. "You heard that? I didn't think we were that loud."

"Vampires have exceptionally good hearing."

I blanched and studied the sandwich in my hand. I'd done things in the shower at home that I might otherwise have done alone in bed at night and he'd only been in the kitchen. The thought that he might actually have heard me brought the blood back to my cheeks with a vengeance, but if he registered my embarrassment, he chose to ignore it.

"They mean well, your friends," he said, "and they are right to be concerned."

"About you?" I set my sandwich down and turned to look at him.

"Yes."

"If everyone is to be believed, Edward, Jacob is as much a danger to Angela as you are to me."

"Not quite. His bark is worse than his bite."

"Huh?"

"He's a shapeshifter, not a Child of the Moon."

"What are you talking about?"

"Hasn't he told you any of this?"

"No. Should he have?"

"Children of the Moon manifest one night every month and, while in wolf form, their bite will infect their victims. Those that survive an attack become werewolves by the next full moon.

"Jacob can transform at will. Should he become unexpectedly angry, however, his transformation might be involuntary and uncontrolled, and that could have devastating consequences on any humans in close proximity. The only way for him to create another wolf is to father a child and wait for it to be of age. The condition, if you will, is genetic and particular to his tribe."

"His tribe?"

"He's a Quileute. Legend has it they are descended from wolves."

"How do you know all this?"

"Aside from it being my business to know everything about my mortal enemies…" He stood and abruptly disappeared into the rows of bookcases, returning with equal speed holding a hardback book, which he placed in front of me. "I read this."

I looked down at the book of Quileute legends and then up at him. I felt dizzy. "Mortal enemies?"

"Oh no, Bella!"

He must have caught me before I smashed my face into my sandwich because I came around with a clean face, lying on the floor with his coat underneath my head and my cloak draped over my body.

He propped me up and handed me a glass of water. "You need to eat," he said, "and tonight I'm cooking. We have to keep your strength up."

…

After dinner, he carried me over to the sofa, setting me on his lap as he sat down. I'd spent the afternoon at the store reading the book about Quileute legends and that had sparked my curiosity.

"Do vampires have legends?" I asked.

"Not legends – histories. True stories of the ancients. Many still walk this earth and some now admit visitors to their castles, exhibit their art collections and encourage scholars to use their libraries."

I leaned into his chest as he spoke, my eyelids getting heavy.

"Carlisle lived with the Italian coven for a few decades. Until recently, they were considered to be the ruling elite, but their main justification for holding power is now null and void. They openly draw blood from their patrons in lieu of an entrance fee to their residence, although I suspect they still employ less salubrious ways of feeding themselves behind the scenes.

"Then there are the Romanians…"

…

My hands were roaming all over his chest, up his neck and into his hair. I could not keep them still. I tilted my head back to expose my neck and felt his cold nose run up and down the side of it until he paused by my ear.

"You are making it extremely difficult to resist you, Bella," he murmured. "I'm not sure if I can control myself. If you could just stop… Oh please, Bella!"


	14. Wanderlust

**14\. Wanderlust**

Perhaps I should have been embarrassed at falling asleep on his lap yet again. Maybe I should have felt some shame for molesting him while I was there.

"I don't want to hurt you," he whispered.

It didn't make any sense. His words sounded like a rejection. And yet within seconds of him uttering them, we had flown through the air and he had propped me up against the wall, his fingers unfastening the button on my jeans.

Down came the zipper and down came the jeans, his hands gently lifting each of my legs to remove them completely.

His nose trailed up my left leg from my ankle to my upper thigh, his cool breath inflaming my skin, until it was pressed against the picot edge of my panties.

Without warning, he sunk his teeth into my flesh. Eleven days and eleven nights I had waited for this – for him.

On the first pull, my hands were in his hair. On the second, his hands slid up my thighs to grip my hips and hold me steady. And then he groaned. At least I think it was him. It could just as well have been me.

The nerves in my thighs began to twitch. I was so close to experiencing ecstasy but I knew I had to stop him in case he couldn't stop himself. I said his name, just the once, and he relaxed his jaw.

While he licked the wound over and again, I bit my lip. It wouldn't have been fair of me to beg him for more when he'd already given me what I wanted.

But then he did something quite unexpected. He pulled me down to straddle his thighs, ran his hand up my back until his fingers were buried in the hair on my scalp and kissed me full on the mouth.

I should have recoiled at the taste of my own blood on his lips but instead, I gripped his shoulders and shifted forward, bringing my hips closer to his. I leaned my head back into his hand. His lips brushed along my jaw and down my neck, sending shivers through my body. It was the most blissful of tortures.

"I want more, Bella," he murmured.

"More of my blood?"

"More of you."

He moved one hand to my lower back and pulled my body firmly against his, and that was when I felt how affected by me he was.

"You'll have to do it," he whispered, widening his knees and straightening his legs beneath me. "I don't want to hurt you."

My movements were tentative at first but with a few whispered words of encouragement from Edward, I lost all inhibition.

While I ground myself thoroughly against him, surely making a mess all over the front of his pants, he maintained the lightest of touches. One hand lay flat against my bottom, the other between my shoulder blades while he licked and nipped at the skin on my neck.

It didn't take either of us long before we were shuddering and moaning and, after that, I didn't feel remotely guilty for the mess I'd made of his pants because he had made one too.

He held onto me for a few minutes, his blood red eyes fixed on mine, and then he lifted me up and deposited me on the blanket on the sofa.

"I'll just use the shower and then I'll make you some breakfast," he said before he walked away.

…

After dropping me at the bookstore, Edward disappeared for the entire morning. When he returned, his eyes lightened to a deep orange, he kept a measured distance between us for the rest of the day. He also kept a frown on his face.

Mike arrived at midday and asked if I would like to have lunch with him in the coffee shop across the street. The thought of having another awkward discussion about the company I was keeping did not hold much appeal so I declined, not that I would have said yes under normal circumstances.

I watched him walk out and across the street while I unwrapped my sandwich. I poured out a cup of soup and dipped a chunk of the grilled cheese into it. Looking outside again, I caught sight of Mike coming back out of the coffee shop, takeout bag in hand, with none other than Jacob. They shook hands before going their separate ways.

It was hardly surprising that Edward had made no mention of Mike coming in for lunch the previous day while I was with Angela. My friends were obviously in cahoots with each other.

Relieved I'd avoided an ambush, I finished my lunch and printed off the day's orders. Fulfilling those by myself created a much-needed distraction from the gloom that was lurking in between the bookcases.

On our late afternoon drive to the post office, having had enough of Edward's mood, I pulled over and switched off the engine.

"Bella?"

"Do you regret what we did this morning?" I asked, looking out into the rain.

A small child in a bright green all-in-one rain suit and matching boots was splashing around in the puddles on the sidewalk while his mother looked on, laughing.

"I shouldn't have done it," he whispered.

"What? Drink my blood or…"

"Any of it."

"You didn't do it alone, Edward. I knew exactly what we were doing. I wanted it too. All of it."

"I could have hurt you," he whispered. "Or worse."

"But you didn't." I turned to look at him. "And I don't believe that's what's really bothering you."

"I want too much, Bella. Much more than I can have."

"What does that mean?" I frowned and turned back to look at the mother and child walking hand in hand away from us.

"Do you want children?" he asked.

"How is that relevant?"

"Do you see yourself ever having children, Bella?" He sounded exasperated.

"No, I don't think so," I said. "I've never felt remotely maternal."

After a few minutes silence, I turned the key in the ignition, pulled out onto the road and headed for the post office.

…

Throughout my life, I had always taken time to process things. Words and deeds would haunt my mind well after I'd first heard or witnessed them. I'd mull them over and over, much to the consternation of my mother, until I was finally able to act upon them or lay them to rest.

The past few weeks had given me almost too much to think about, too much take on board. I was only just coming to accept the loss of my father some seven years after the event, so there was little hope of me suddenly believing in the supernatural after a mere three weeks in the company of a supposed vampire, was there?

My life was beginning to look like a jigsaw puzzle, one I felt sure I had done repeatedly as a child. The outside edges looked so familiar but when I went to put the middle pieces in place, I found they were double-sided and couldn't work out which way was up.

Once I'd finished my dinner, I joined a taciturn Edward on the sofa, putting as much distance between us as possible so I could write my thoughts down in a notebook.

I wrote page after page of observations, questions and suppositions, but the only conclusion I could draw was that if everything he had told me about himself and his family was true, I had been grossly misinformed by the array of books and movies Angela had forced upon me when were in high school.

And one question I could not get my head around was: why, after learning of his sister's deception, had Edward elected to stay with me in my apartment and be a willing participant in my boring life?

…

In the middle of the night, I awoke overheated and gasping with thirst. I reached out for Edward, patting at the sheets to my left, but he wasn't there. I called out to him but there was no answer.

I switched on the lamp and blinked until my eyes had adjusted to the light. I looked up at the roof joists, expecting him to be perched above me, but he wasn't.

I got out of bed and went to the refrigerator for a bottle of water and then looked around the apartment. I lifted the lid on my blanket chest, rifled through the closet and poked my nose into the bathroom. Nothing was amiss. Even the locks on the front door were still in place.

Recalling the night when he'd fed from me and vanished, I turned to look at the window that had been open, letting in a draft. It appeared to be closed but, on closer inspection, I found it was wasn't shut tight. There was a small, flat piece of wood wedged in between the bottom edge and the frame. I removed it, closed the window and stared out into the darkness.

Edward had barely left my side since his arrival – if I didn't count the time he said he'd had a run in with a mountain lion, or the times he'd done the laundry, or his visit to the grocery store and then the thrift store…

Or the previous morning when he'd been upset by what had happened between us – when feeding from me had morphed into something more overtly sexual.

Where had he gone? When did he go? Would he be coming back?

The thought of him leaving for good had me feeling sick to my stomach, but I wasn't about to sit around waiting. I was done with being static.

I marched back over to my closet, grabbed some clothes and stepped into the bathroom to change. Once dressed, I put on my boots and cloak, picked up my purse and walked out of my apartment.

It was strangely peaceful driving my truck along the empty streets of Port Angeles. I pulled over outside the bookstore and fumbled in my purse for my keys. The fact that I had them meant Edward was unlikely to be in there. Nevertheless, I got out into the crisp night air.

The clang of the bell above the door had me jumping out of my skin as it shattered the silence. I took one step inside and immediately a movement to my left caught my eye. As if my heart wasn't already pounding enough.

"Hello, dear," said Mrs C, tapping a bunch of bills on the desk. "Do come in and close the door."

Although it was almost as cold inside as out, I removed my cloak and hung it on the coat stand.

Mrs C switched on the desk lamp. "Make yourself a cup of tea, dear. We haven't had a chat in ages. Not since your young man has been doing your laundry."

I dropped my keys on the cash desk, walked through to the back and put the kettle on. There was a packet of unopened cookies on the counter – triple chocolate chip. I made my tea and carried it and the cookies back with me to sit with Mrs C.

"Edward says you're a ghost," I said, opening the cookie packet.

She smiled down at her ledger. "You can't kid me, Bella. You knew what I was when we first met; you simply ignored it. Don't get me wrong, though, it has been wonderful to be treated as if I were still human."

I finished my mouthful of cookie and washed it down with some tea. "My dad was a ghost for seven years after his death," I said. "He was waiting all that time for me to be able to say goodbye. Is someone keeping you here?"

"Only me," she said, "and maybe one or two strays I've met along the way – the people that have minded the store for me."

"When did you die?"

She closed the ledger, put the stacks of bills into a money bag for the bank and lay her hands on the table.

"About twenty-five years ago," she said, gazing into space. "I'd been used to him travelling for a year or two at a time."

"Who?"

"Alistair."

"Your nephew?"

"My lover, dear. You'll see why I say I'm his aunt if you ever meet him." She turned on her stool to face me. "He always came back but he could never stay put for longer than a month. Itchy feet, you know. I soon learned to make the most of our time together whenever he was with me."

I stuffed half a cookie into my mouth while I waited for her to continue.

"He fed from me one too many times," she said.

The crumbs caught in my throat and I almost spilled my tea in my hurry to pick it up and drink it all down before I died from a choking fit.

"He didn't know," she said. "I was in recovery when he left and doing well, but… I had to wait for his return to give him the bad news. He was distraught at first, wracked with guilt, but we worked it out and here I am, still waiting for him to come home again. You know how it is. Time doesn't mean the same thing for their kind."

"The last box was shipped from the east coast," I said. "It could be a while."

"I don't mind, dear. Not when I have such lovely company."

She smiled again and then her face changed. She walked her fingers across the desk and laid her hand over mine. There was much more substance to it than there had been to my dad's at the end.

"Don't be afraid to change your life, Bella," she said. "If you love that young man half as much as he loves you, you should let him turn you before it's too late."

She hopped off the stool and gathered her things. "I need to go and put this money in the night depository. Lock up when you leave, dear."

Mrs C disappeared, literally, along with the bank deposit, leaving me with half a packet of triple chocolate chip cookies to finish and lots of unanswered questions. I wandered through the store to think, leaving a trail of crumbs behind me.

Temporarily suspending disbelief, I wondered why Alistair hadn't made his lover into a vampire. Was it his choice or hers that prevented him? Did a human have to be close to death for it to work, as Edward had described with his family?

Edward…

Mrs C had said he loved me and she'd assumed I loved him back. We'd obviously put on a convincing front. If she'd known the real circumstances as to how he came to be living with me, she would likely be disappointed.

I put the empty cookie wrapper in the trash and carried my cup to the back to rinse it out. I was drying my hands when the doorbell clanged behind me.

If I hadn't been full of tea and cookies, I'm sure I would have fainted on the spot. As it was, my poor heart was beating out of my chest. I hoped my dad's condition wasn't hereditary.

The door clicked shut and heavy footsteps crossed the floor, getting closer and closer. I stood motionless, holding my breath, wishing I was invisible in the darkness.

When he spoke, his voice was hard and angry. "Would you mind telling me what you are doing here all alone at this time of night with the door unlocked?"

* * *

 **A Big Thank You** to The Lemonade Stand for recommending this story!


	15. Fodder

**15\. Fodder**

It might have been a trick of the light, shadows cast by the lamp on the cash desk behind him, but I had never seen him look so angry, never seen him look so inhuman.

Petrified at the very sight of him, a peculiar squeaking noise escaped my open mouth.

His face crumpled. "Forgive me," he said, holding out his hand. "I've been out of my mind with worry. It was never my intention to frighten you."

My hand shook when I put it in his, but still I let him lead me to the front of the store, grimacing when I saw my keys on the cash desk where I'd left them when I'd first come in. I didn't look up. I knew I would be met with a glare of disapproval.

Edward drove us back to my apartment, quietly relaying his side of events from the moment he'd returned to my apartment and been unable to get back in through the window he'd left wedged open.

It had made sense that I had awoken and closed my window, but he'd grown anxious when he'd come around to the other side of the building to knock on my door and discovered my truck was missing.

Failing to get a response from me, he'd tried Mrs C's door. She hadn't answered either and that in itself was most unusual.

He'd sat on the steps for a while, willing me to return. Then cursing himself for wasting time, he had run through the streets, searching for my scent until he'd chanced upon my truck outside the bookstore in the parking spot reserved for patrons only.

Seeing me moving around inside, he had been relieved at first, but that relief had soon turned to fury when he'd pushed the front door open with ease. It should have been locked.

I listened while he poured everything out, not saying a word until we were lying side by side under the bedcovers, staring up at the ceiling.

"You left me," I whispered. "Where did you go?"

"Hunting. I've been out almost every night since that time I nearly lost control."

"Did you catch anything?"

"I always catch my prey, Bella."

"Won't you get fat?"

"No, Bella."

"But every night, Edward?"

"It's a necessary precaution. You talk in your sleep a lot and take off your… Your blood is a constant source of temptation."

"If being around me is so difficult, why are you still here?"

Met with silence, I tried a different tack.

"Why would your sister trick you into living with me?"

He sighed. "I suspect she thought she was helping me to embrace the new world order."

I turned my head. "What new world order?"

He sniggered. "Clearly, I'm not the only one choosing to ignore it."

He rubbed his hands over his face and then dropped them back down onto the bed, the hand between us landing on top of mine. I interlaced my fingers with his.

"I'm a quiet man, Bella," he said softly. "I like my own company and, like you, I prefer it much of the time. I like to read, listen to music and play the piano, and I like to be away from the bustle of the human world – at home, or in the depths of the forest or high up on a mountain."

I turned on my side and stared at his profile.

"I did not ask to become fashionable," he said, wrinkling his nose in disgust. "I didn't ask for someone to champion my cause. Nor did I consent to be outed. Everyone I meet now knows exactly what I am no matter how hard I might try to conceal it and it is rare for someone to look beyond that… patina, whether they love it or loathe it." He tapped his temple. "I know that for a fact."

I wrapped my free arm around his waist and snuggled closer. He woke me with some coffee a couple of hours later, saying it was nearly time to leave for the bookstore. I washed my face and brushed my hair, staying dressed in the clothes I'd put on in the middle of the night.

He was waiting for me in my truck when I was done.

…

Edward stood beside me like a waiter attending a customer in a fine restaurant while I ate my breakfast at my desk. All that was missing was the black apron around his waist and the white cloth draped over his forearm.

He had cooked me an omelette stuffed with cheese and spinach, placed it on a heated plate, covered it with tin foil and wrapped it in a towel to keep it warm on its journey in the truck. He'd even thought to pack a knife and fork.

When I'd finished, he took my plate to the back and fetched me a cup of coffee. When I had drunk that down, he followed me as I wandered through the store, checking everything was in order.

I stopped to straighten a shelf and felt his cool breath on the back of my head and then the cold skin of his nose nuzzling the side of my neck. It made me shiver.

"What are you up to?" I asked, stepping back to find myself wrapped in his arms.

"Enjoying your fragrance."

"I'm not wearing any."

"And very happy am I that you're not. I much prefer your natural scent."

"What do I smell of?"

"Dinner."

I laughed. "That's just what every girl wants to hear, that she smells of garlic and onions."

"Oh no, Bella. I'd say you smell like something far more delicious than that."

"What then? Grilled cheese?"

"Bacon."

I turned around in his arms and, as I did so, my lips brushed over his. We each had our eyes wide open, staring at the other in surprise and maybe something else.

But of course, the bell above the door clanged and we both remembered where we were and what we were supposed to be doing.

Mike didn't come in for lunch that day and that had me on edge. I ate my grilled cheese and tomato soup with my eyes glued to the coffee shop across the street, but I didn't notice anything untoward.

Not looking at where my food was going was a mistake, though, as I had to spend twenty minutes in the tiny restroom trying to get tomato soup out of my jeans before it left a stain.

Edward was right outside the door when I came back out.

"You don't know what to do with yourself today, do you?" I said.

"I can't help it," he said. "I'm trying to give you space, but…"

I pointed to the battered leather armchair. He took the hint and perched on the arm while I sat down at my desk, turning my chair to face him.

"Perhaps a game of twenty questions will distract you," I said. "Let's pretend I believe you're a…"

"Vampire?" he said, sounding less than enthusiastic about the idea.

I nodded. "I'll ask the questions and you can answer them."

"That's hardly fair, Bella."

I ignored his protest and started the game. "What do you eat?

"Talking about my diet is hardly the best method of distraction in the current circumstances, is it?"

I leaned back in my chair and twirled a piece of my hair around one finger.

He sighed. "I drink blood."

"Where does the blood come from?"

"Animals," he said, lowering his gaze to my left thigh, "most of the time."

"Do all vampires drink from animals?"

"I only know of a very few that do – my family and one other coven."

"So, all others drink…"

"Human blood."

"But how can they when they openly live among us?"

"Do you remember me telling you of the Italian coven? How they draw blood from the patrons that visit their home?" I nodded. "That is one way, although it's not always the most satisfying of solutions. Some might keep a coterie of willing donors – humans with a fetish for that kind of thing."

I cringed, wondering if I was one such human.

"Strictly speaking," he said, "murder is currently out of the question but, as with humans, a sense of morality is never guaranteed. Those that want to participate in modern society without accidentally eating their new friends can purchase quantities of human blood from blood banks."

"That blood is donated by humans for humans! What if we need it?"

"You really have no idea, do you?"

"Of what?"

"What's going on around you. Don't you watch the news or listen to the radio?"

"You might have noticed I don't have the means to do either."

"Don't you ever read a newspaper?"

"No."

"Surf the internet?"

I shook my head and stared at him.

Eventually, he smiled. "We're not so dissimilar, you and I," he said, "except that I have had the disadvantage of being a mind reader in a family of avid television watchers and internet surfers. Despite my efforts to shut them and the rest of world out, it was virtually impossible for me not to keep abreast of current affairs."

"Living with me must be a pleasant change then," I said, grinning.

"Pleasant doesn't even begin to describe it," he muttered, shifting on his perch. "Vampire blood banks are completely different entities to human ones. Blood isn't collected on the premises, it is delivered. Much of the blood donated for medical purposes is not fit for purpose. Disease, however, is not an issue for our kind. We can safely consume what would otherwise be discarded and that which is past its use by date."

"But you and your family don't do that."

"No. Other than what Alice made me drink before I came to you, I hadn't drunk human blood in decades. None of my family have – unless you count Emmett and Jasper's occasional slip-ups.

"Slip-ups?"

"Jasper's beginnings were very different from the rest of us. It isn't easy to change something so fundamental when it has been ingrained for over a century. One little paper cut and poof." He snapped his fingers.

"That's a bit unnerving," I said. "You walk among us but you could change your minds at any time and we wouldn't stand a chance."

"Indeed. My brother Emmett has slipped twice because, as he put it, they smelled especially delicious."

"Like I do to you."

"Yes."

"Don't you miss human food?"

"I can barely remember how it should taste and smell."

"But you smell it whenever you or I cook."

"Human food smells like dirt to us, no matter what it is."

"Well, that's flattering! You said I smell like bacon."

He shrugged. "It was my favourite food when I was human."

I frowned. "I'd miss grilled cheese."

"I know." He smiled.

"And coffee."

"I know, Bella."

"And chocolate."

"I've not seen you eat any chocolate."

"I don't keep it in the house, other than the dark stuff for baking. I'd eat it before it even reached the cabinet."

"I can relate to that compulsion," he murmured, leaning toward me. I was caught in his gaze, unable to move as he loomed closer and closer.

I swallowed. "Is all this talk of food making you want to feed again, Edward?"

He shook his head but his eyes were darkening right in front of me.

"I assure you, Bella, I'm quite in control of my thirst." He brushed his cheek against mine, cooling the beginnings of a blush, and whispered in my ear, "But I am hungry."

And then he was perched once more on the arm of the chair, holding the stack of orders that had been on my desk over his lap.

"Mike's coming," he said and, sure enough, Mike breezed in with a small, brown paper bag in his hand, the door bell clanging above his head.

He stopped short and frowned at me. "Are you feeling alright, Bella? You look a little flushed."

"He's right," Edward said, standing up. "I'll fetch you some water."

I shunted my chair back around to face the desk and Mike sat on the vacated armchair. He leaned forward and placed the paper bag in front of me, unfolding the top to release a truly tempting aroma.

"I bought you some cookies, Bella," he said.

That was a first. Mike had to have been taking tips from someone new, but I wasn't about to let that hinder my indulgence. I peeked inside the bag at the three freshly baked triple chocolate chip cookies.

I'd heard it said that chocolate and sex were interchangeable pleasures for women and had often wondered if that meant that the majority of chocolate-devouring women were, therefore, being short-changed in the bedroom. Or maybe, like me, they were being teased by a man purporting to be a vampire.

Edward had gotten me a little hot and flustered but Mike had brought me the kind of instant gratification that could be had in public. Both of them were about to witness firsthand why I didn't keep such delicacies at home for long – if at all.

I was holding the first of the delicious smelling cookies up in readiness when Edward returned with a glass of water and set it on my desk. With the orders in hand, he wandered off out of sight.

The cookie was almost in my mouth when Mike spoke. "How exactly did you meet Edward?"

Reluctantly, I placed the cookie back in the bag, picked up my water and took a long drink, my mind racing for an answer that would neither be a lie nor fuel his curiosity.

"Um… We met through a mutual acquaintance," I said.

"And he moved in straight away? Because I have to say, Bella, he seems to have come out of nowhere."

Edward appeared in front of my desk and slammed a book down on it along with the corresponding dispatch note. I looked up at him. His brow was furrowed. His eyes darted from me to the cookies, to Mike and back to me again before he turned and disappeared once more into the maze.

Why hadn't I told Mike the truth? I'd done nothing to be ashamed of and Mike already knew one half of Edward's act, so why was I behaving like I had something to hide?

I sat up straight and turned to Mike. "I hired Edward from an agency like the one Jacob works for."

"An escort?" Mike turned green and, though he lowered his voice, there was no getting away from the fact that he was incensed. "Were you out of your mind, Bella? You hired a vampire escort? For what? Sex?"

"No!" Why would he think that? "For a party. And you know I don't believe in all that supernatural nonsense."

He shook his head. "But he's been here for weeks now. Oh hell! He has been feeding from you, hasn't he? Show me where he bit you, Bella."

He stood up and put his hands on the desk, leaning forward to inspect my neck. Without thinking, I pressed my thighs together and he paled.

"Oh no! It's worse than I thought," he whispered. "He's got you under his spell, and when he's had enough… All these years, you've been a shadow of the person you should have been and just when you're coming back to me…"

"Stop it!" I said, pushing back my chair and getting to my feet. "It's not like that at all. Yes, I hired him and yes, the agent turned out to be a trickster, but trick or treat, he's mine now and I'm keeping him!"

I clapped my hand over my mouth but it was too late.

Mike snatched up the bag of cookies, tears forming in his eyes. "I need these more than you do," he said and then he hurried out of the store.


	16. Consolation

**16\. Consolation**

Despite his dogged determination to win me over, Mike had always meant well. He'd continued to care about me even when I'd persisted in rejecting his advances time and again.

Where my words had come from, I had no idea. They were spoken in the heat of the moment, unthinking and defensive, and, to my horror, showed a possessive streak I hadn't known existed beyond my book collection.

Before Mike was even out of view, a movement to my left caught my attention. Edward was standing at the end of an aisle with a pile of books in his arms, the corners of his mouth twitching.

"Got something to say?" I asked.

"I don't know whether to admire his bravery for holding that conversation with you while I was within earshot or throttle him for upsetting you."

I sighed. "He didn't upset me, Edward."

"He took away your cookies," he said. Admittedly, that was a little disappointing.

He walked over to my desk and set the pile of books down. Then, placing his hands flat on either side of the pile, he leaned toward me until his eyes were level with mine.

"And you, Bella," he murmured. "You have me so off kilter right now, I don't know which way to turn. Did you stop to consider your words before you spoke?"

I frowned. "Should I not have told the truth?"

"That rather depends on whether you regret what you said." His eyes narrowed. "What exactly _are_ you keeping me for, Bella?"

There was an edge to his voice that made me nervous – nervous enough to hedge. "Well, it's not often a girl finds a man that can cook _and_ do the housework."

There wasn't even a flicker of amusement on his face. "Do you think you will ever accept what I am?" he asked.

My throat was dry. "I've accepted the parts of you which matter most."

He pursed his lips for a moment, his eyes glinting. "Oh, the monster matters too, Bella, and that part of me will always be most interested in you."

Sleep deprivation must have finally caught up with me and not only wreaked havoc on my ability to lie but also dragged my sense of humour down to somewhere below the belt. Edward's belt to be precise, not that he was wearing one.

My face must have been quite the picture as I struggled to suppress a giggle. A snort escaped.

"I really wish I could see inside that mind of yours," Edward said, slowly rounding the desk without releasing me from his gaze. He reached down and pulled open the drawer containing the padded envelopes, grabbed a handful and glided back to the other side of the desk.

I blinked and shook my head. Was Mike right? Did Edward have me under his spell? Did that make him a magician or a hypnotist? Certainly, there was no end to his talents.

…

Late that afternoon, Edward ran ahead to drop the orders at the post office before it closed, leaving me to follow behind and pick him up once our last customer had left some fifteen minutes later.

He climbed into the truck and placed a white cardboard box on the bench seat between us, lifting the lid to display the contents: a selection of large cookies, each one containing chocolate in some form or other.

I'd eaten one before I'd even turned the key in the ignition. With both hands on the wheel, I pulled out and then reached for another. The box was virtually empty by the time I'd parked in my driveway.

"Is there any particular reason you lose all control around chocolate?" Edward asked putting the lid back on the box.

I swallowed my mouthful and licked some chocolate off my lips, noticing how his eyes tracked the movement of my tongue.

"Everything about it draws me in," I said. "The colour, the smell and then to feel it melt on my tongue… You must have eaten chocolate at some point, Edward."

"I don't remember it," he said, opening the door of the truck.

I followed him up the steps – he was holding the box with the last cookie in it so I wasn't letting that out of my sight – and handed him my keys. He placed the box on the kitchen table and sat down on the sofa with a book.

While I went about my evening routine, my mind whirred, so much so that by bedtime I was wide awake, lying on my back beside Edward, who had continued to hold his book in front of his face even after I'd switched off the lamp.

"I feel like I'm awakening from the longest of slumbers," I said, pulling my arms out from under the covers to rest them on top.

He turned his head and smirked. "But I haven't even kissed you yet, Not-Sleeping Bella."

"Yes, you have." I smiled. "You kissed me just yesterday."

"That I did, but I'd like to think you were fully awake at the time."

I turned on my side to look at him, propping myself up on my elbow and allowing my hair to cover half my face.

"I've not really had a view of the world," I said, "but it isn't that I've been wearing blinkers or anything. I've simply not looked. And that has me thinking that by refusing to see what you are, perhaps I've not really been seeing all of who you are."

He placed his book on the floor and rolled onto his side to face me. "Look at me now then, Bella. Tell me what you see. Tell me what I am."

One small, four letter word was on the tip of my tongue, but possessiveness is an ugly trait and I didn't want to scare him off by using it twice in one day. Neither did I want to challenge everything I believed about another unmentionable four letter word.

"Even if I accept that you are what you say you are," I whispered, "and acknowledge that there is more to this world than I've previously allowed myself to entertain, I'm not sure I'm ready to leave the confines of my hypothetical four poster bed. I want to keep the curtains drawn around me."

He reached out and took a lock of my hair between his finger and thumb and tucked it behind my ear. "And keep the monsters out? I'm afraid it's too late for that, Not-Sleeping Bella. There's a monster already lying in bed beside you."

"If you're a monster, you can't kiss me. Only the handsome prince gets to do that."

He leaned toward me and said, "Can't I be both?"

I believe I moaned when his lips touched mine and I must have closed my eyes. The moment was so fleeting, I began to think I'd either imagined it or was dreaming because, in that one brief blink of an eye, he had returned to lying on his back with the book in his hand.

"You, Edward Cullen, are a tease!"

"I have no idea what you mean, Miss Swan."

"You can't just dazzle a girl like that if you don't intend to…"

He raised an eyebrow and turned a page. "To what? Have intercourse with her? Because we both know that isn't what you hired me for. You were quite clear in your answer to Mike."

"Some of us can't sit on joists to avoid temptation, Edward!"

I rolled over in a huff but I soon felt his arms come around me and pull me back against his cold body.

Just as I was drifting off to sleep, he whispered in my ear. "We've both shut the world out in our own way when perhaps we should have been embracing it. Perhaps we should be embracing… life, such as it is."

…

Sometimes dreams don't make any sense and sometimes they do. I knew exactly where I was while I watched my father cleaning his guns at the kitchen table. I could almost pinpoint the date too, but something or someone had shifted time.

Turning in a circle, I took in the dark panelled walls, yellow cabinet doors and white linoleum floor. My dad hadn't changed a thing in the house since my mother had left with me, other than my bedroom.

"Why, Dad?"

"Why what, Bells?"

"Why did you decorate my room but not change the rest of the house."

"It's just a house, Bella."

"Did you think she'd come back?"

He put his gun down and looked up at me. "I hoped."

"We're as bad as each other," I said. "You're no better at letting go of someone you love than I am."

"I let her go, Bella, but she took my heart with her."

"But how can you still love her after what she did?"

He stared at me for a few seconds, not blinking. "There's more than one way to have your heart stolen from you."

"Do you think yours will ever mend?"

"Already has." His mustache twitched as he picked up the oily rag and turned his attention back to his gun.

If his heart had mended, then how come he had died?

I closed my eyes as my tears began to fall, my body shaking with the weight of my emotions.

"Shh, Bella."

My face was squashed against something cool and damp. Ice cold lips touched my forehead as the rigid iron hoops that were holding me together softened around me. I tilted my head back and opened my eyes to see Edward's face.

"I made a mess of your shirt," I whispered.

He wiped at my tears with his thumb and then raised it to his mouth and licked it. "Mmm," he said. "Salty."

"Like bacon." I half smiled.

He briefly closed his eyes, shaking his head before opening them again. They were somewhat darker than they had been previously.

"What?" I asked.

"I want to wash your tears away," he said and, in a split second, I was flat on my back with Edward hovering over me, his hands on either side of my head and his knees either side of my hips.

"I have to be so careful with you, Bella," he whispered.

The tip of his tongue peeked out as he lowered his face to mine. He began to lick all over my cheeks until I was torn between laughing hysterically and crying out in disgust.

It has to be said, though, he bore no resemblance to a dog whatsoever. Rather more, it was like one cat licking another – strangely submissive and reverential.

But when he moved his lips and tongue to my neck, my body arched under his, willing him to lower himself down on top of me. My thighs pressed against his calves and he took the hint, shifting his legs one at a time until they were between mine.

Our subsequent movements were so instinctive, I didn't realise I had bent my knees and wrapped my legs around his waist until I felt him rubbing his groin against mine.

I wished he wasn't wearing jeans. I wished I wasn't wearing panties.

He raised himself up on his forearms and stared down at me as he moved his hips, his mouth closed. I wound my arms around his neck and hauled myself up to kiss him, but his lips did not respond.

I ran a hand through his hair and tugged. He groaned and pulled himself upright, bringing me into his lap, just as he had the last time he'd fed from me.

"Please, Bella," he whispered.

Under any other circumstances (say, for example, with Mike, since there had been no others) I'd have complained at having to do all the work again. But I was slowly coming to accept that Edward felt he couldn't do this without risk, whether it was to my body or his sanity, and something made me want to indulge him.

I became the cat, lapping at his face and jaw as I writhed in his lap. Then I became the vampire, nipping and sucking at his neck until he shuddered and jerked beneath me.

"You didn't finish," he whispered, slipping his cold fingers inside the elastic of my panties.

"Am I dreaming?" I said when his other hand slid under my pyjama top to support my back.

Dreaming or not, the chill of his skin awoke every nerve in my body until I was wide-eyed and open-mouthed, gasping for air.

I nuzzled his neck, breathing him in, fully aware of the damp patches between us. "You'd save on laundry if you took your shirt and pants off in future," I mumbled.

His body shook with laughter. "That is as maybe, Bella, but doing laundry is a small price to pay in order to avoid accidents."

"Oh."

He left me only to change his pants and then held me once more as I slipped back to sleep.

…

I stared at the computer screen. I hadn't written anything for two weeks and what I'd just re-read made little sense anymore. I looked across the kitchen table. Edward was flipping through the pages of his notebook, deep creases forming between his eyebrows.

Neither of us had commented on our middle of the night activities, but at least this time he had shown no signs of regret.

He raised his eyes and then one eyebrow. "Writer's block?" he asked.

Momentarily, I was lost in his gaze. There was not a trace of red in those golden yellow irises. He was well fed but not from me. We'd been intimate without so much as a tooth breaking skin.

"Bella?"

"Um… I don't know," I said, waving my hand at my laptop. "I can't relate to this at all. It's as if someone else wrote it."

"Hmm."

He got up and went to the closet, returning with a notebook that could only be one of his own. He set it down beside me on the table and I picked it up, turning it over in my hands. It had a smooth leather cover, chestnut brown in colour, and the thick yellowed pages were ruled with faint green lines.

"Let's swap," he said, snatching up my laptop and moving back to his seat. He rolled his fountain pen across the table top toward me. "I'll start a new document and you can start a new notebook."

"But what should I write about?"

"Your thoughts, your memories. You could write about your father."

I liked that idea very much. I took the cap off the pen, opened the notebook to the first page and felt immediately daunted. I was holding what appeared to be an antique pen over what may well have been an equally aged book.

"Start with his name," Edward said.

The pen moved fluidly across the page, my writing almost unrecognisable, it was so neat, and once I'd started, I couldn't stop. While Edward tapped lightly at the keyboard, I filled page after page of the notebook with memories, some distant ones from the two weeks a year I'd spent with my father while growing up and many more from our years in Forks with him alive and then a ghost.

Edward had to refill the pen a few times and, occasionally, I had to stop and wipe my eyes with my sleeve lest I smudge the ink, but for much of the next few hours I did nothing but smile.

Only later, when I lay beside Edward in bed, did it dawn on me that I was finally ready to do something I'd hitherto been avoiding.


	17. Objective

**17\. Objective**

My good intentions to take a turn doing the laundry were well and truly scuppered.

Edward, super efficient, domesticated vampire that he was, had already washed the towels and started a second load with our clothes before I'd woken up. No sooner was I out of bed than he was stripping off the sheets and pillowcases and gathering them up in his arms.

"I'll just go and fetch the towels from the dryer," he said, disappearing out of the front door. He was back moments later with a stack of warm, fluffy towels, which he placed in my arms as I shuffled past him, bleary-eyed, into the bathroom.

Breakfast was on the table when I came back out. The smell of eggs and hot buttered toast was mouthwatering.

Edward leaned against the countertop while I ate, waiting for the last forkful of egg to enter my mouth before he poured me a cup of coffee and placed it on the table in front of me. He then turned and headed straight for the front door.

"Why are you in such a hurry?" I asked.

He stopped with his back to me, his head bowed and his shoulders slumped forward.

"What's the matter, Edward?"

"Nothing," he said.

I got up from the table and walked over to him, placing a hand flat on his back between his shoulder blades. I peeked around to look at his face. His eyes were shut tight and it dawned on me that I hadn't really looked at him yet that morning,

"Let me see you," I said, rubbing the tips of my fingers lightly over his back.

He turned his head a fraction and slowly opened his eyes. They were pitch black. I had the strongest urge to touch my left thigh.

"Should I have fed you last night?"

"I should have gone out, but…" He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "You wrapped yourself around me and wouldn't let go, and I…"

"Sleeping in my bed is making things very hard for you, isn't it?"

He blew out a breath and straightened up. His mouth curled up on one side. "You could say that, yes."

"Can you hunt in daylight?" He nodded. "Then for goodness sake go now. I can finish off the laundry. I need a word with Mrs C in any case."

…

The door to the downstairs apartment was on the latch so I pushed it open and wandered through to the laundry room.

I tugged Edward's and my clothes out of the dryer and into the basket and switched the bedding over. Then, while I began to fold the clothes, Mrs C magically appeared beside me.

"Oh!" I said, clutching the tank top in my hands to my chest.

"You're looking good today, Bella," she said, picking up one of my long sleeved T-shirts and laying it out flat on top of the washer. "How are things going with your young man?"

"Good," I said, smiling until the unsolicited memory of a two-page contract tainted my thoughts. I shook my head and bent down to pick up one of Edward's T-shirts. As I folded it in half, I noticed it was riddled with holes front and back for several inches above the hem.

"Mrs C," I said, smoothing out the damaged fabric, "I need to sort out my father's house in Forks. I've put it off far too long." I retrieved another equally holey T-shirt from the basket. "I realise it's inconvenient but would it be alright if I closed the store for a couple of days."

"Bella, dear, you haven't taken a single day off work since you started, let alone a vacation. It's about time you did. Take the whole week. I'll put a sign on the door tonight. You can post a message for customers on the internet."

I gathered up all my underwear and began to stack the panties into a neat pile on top of the dryer.

"Can I ask you something personal?" I said, twisting the last pair the right way out – the very pair I'd been wearing two nights before when Edward had slipped his cold fingers inside them.

"Of course, dear."

My face was beginning to feel a little warm. I reached down into the basket and pulled out a pair of Edward's jeans. There were three parallel slashes on the front of each leg and another set dangerously close the fly. I winced.

"Did you and Alistair…? When you were still human… did you ever…?"

"Make love?" she asked. I looked at her out of the corner of my eye. She was grinning. "Oh yes, dear. All the time. Like rabbits."

I placed the pile of folded laundry in the basket and picked it up. "Thank you, Mrs C. I'll be back for the bedding in an hour or so," I said. "I'd best go and start packing."

My apartment was quiet when I stepped back inside. I emptied the basket of clean laundry, putting everything away before I went into the main room to fill a small backpack with my laptop, notebooks and pens. Then I headed back into the closet to pack a holdall.

So absorbed was I in my task that Edward gave me a start when he appeared in the doorway.

"Where are you going?" he asked, a frown forming on his mud-smeared face.

"To my father's house," I replied, refolding a T-shirt and placing it in the bag.

"You were going to leave without me."

"No!" I looked up at his sad face. Silly vampire. "I was hoping you'd join me, although it won't be much of a vacation."

His expression quickly lightened and his lips curved up into a wide smile, exposing his shiny white teeth. He pulled out his own bag and began to fill it while I covertly studied the clothes he was wearing.

His navy blue, long-sleeved T-shirt was splattered with something dark and damp. His jeans were caked in greyish-brown mud to halfway up his calves and, further up one of the legs, three rips in the denim gaped open whenever he crouched down, revealing the pale skin of his thigh.

He caught me staring and raised an eyebrow.

"Um, there's time to take a shower and change before we leave," I said, hiding my blush with my hair as I pulled the zipper across the top of my bag. "I'll just go and retrieve the bedding from Mrs C's dryer."

…

The Thriftway was unusually busy for a Monday lunchtime. Edward walked beside me with his cheeks sucked in so much I wondered if he'd taken a bite out of one of the lemons in the fruit aisle.

"Are you sure you don't want to wait in the truck?" I asked.

"Perhaps if you hold my hand, they'll think I'm taken and stop."

"What are you going on about?" I brushed his outstretched hand away, rubbed the top edges of a polythene bag together to open it and reached for an onion.

"Look around you," he said.

I dropped the bag of onions into the cart and turned my head. Every single woman in the aisle was staring at us and so were a couple of the men. I looked up at Edward. His jaw was clenched.

"Why are they all staring?" I whispered. "Is it because they know you're, um, different?"

He grimaced. "No."

"Edward?" I put my hand on his cheek, stroking his smooth skin with my thumb. "What's wrong?"

"They are fantasising about doing… things to me."

"What kinds of things?"

"Sexually explicit kinds of things," he whispered.

"Even the men?"

"One of them, yes."

"What's the other one thinking about?"

"You."

Ah. "But that's normal human behaviour. We all do that. It doesn't mean we expect to act upon it."

"But I can hear their thoughts, Bella, and they're mostly sordid."

"They don't know that though, do they? And you are a rather fine figure of a man, especially when you're smiling." His lips twitched at the corners. "Let's not dazzle the good people of Forks, Edward," I said, forcing a frown. "Serious face now."

I took his hand and dragged him through the store, picking up the remaining items on my shopping list until I came to the very last one.

"Are you sure you don't want to go and sit in the truck?" I asked him again.

"I'm fine."

I sighed, pushed myself up on my tiptoes and grabbed a small red box, throwing it into the cart as casually as I could. One quick glance up at Edward and I knew I hadn't gotten away with it. He was staring at the box with his mouth wide open.

"Condoms?" he asked.

"Yes, to save on laundry and avoid any, um, accidents," I said, trying and failing to keep my voice even.

He took the box out of the cart and put it back on the shelf. "That is not the kind of accident I meant, Bella."

I frowned at him. "What other kind is there when it comes to sex?"

"You want to have this discussion here?"

I put my hands on my hips. "Um, yes?"

"I can't have intercourse with you, Bella," he whispered. "I could kill you. Even if I managed to control my lust for your blood, I'm not sure I would be able to rein in my physical strength in throes of passion."

"Mrs C and Alistair were lovers. Did you know that? If he and you are the same, then…"

He ducked his head and turned his body away slightly. "You have an advantage over me, Bella. I've no idea what it would be like for me."

"What?"

"I've never… I'm still a virgin."

"Oh." There was so much I wanted to say to that but it was not an admission to be taken lightly, so I bit my lip, reached up to retrieve the box of condoms and threw it back into the cart.

I wove my arm under Edward's and wrapped it around his waist. "Just in case," I said. "My dad taught me it's best to be prepared for all eventualities."

…

The drive to my father's house was silent with the exception of my noisy heart, which was pounding in my ears with increasing regularity.

A few tiny spots of rain fell on the windshield as I pulled into the driveway and parked the truck. I stared out at the tired, old house surrounded by long grass and overgrown shrubs.

What had I been thinking? I had thought I was ready but in that moment, faced with the task of clearing my father's house, I felt anything but.

Edward broke the silence. "Bella? Could you take a breath for me?"

I sucked in a lungful of air, almost choking on it, and turned to him as I let it back out again.

"Okay?" he asked,

"Just about, yeah."

"Let's get everything inside before the rain sets in. We need to warm the house up and get you something to eat and drink."

The house both smelled and felt dank inside so I adjusted the thermostat as I walked past it into the kitchen. Edward followed behind me, setting the grocery bags down on the table before he went back outside for our holdalls.

I put my backpack down on one of the chairs, filled the kettle with water and put it on the stove to boil. I needed a strong, black coffee before I ventured anywhere else in the house.

"I've put our bags at the bottom of the stairs for now," Edward said, coming back into the kitchen.

I put a heaped teaspoonful of coffee granules into the cup and poured in the boiling water, stirring until there was a pale froth on the surface of the drink. Then, cup in hand, I walked past Edward and our bags into the living room.

The empty recliner was almost demanding my attention but I could not bring myself to look at it.

My dad hadn't had much in the way of possessions. The media cabinet was full of long playing records and cassette tapes, the shelf under the coffee table housed his collection of fishing magazines and the sideboard held goodness knew what. In all the time I'd lived there, I'd never had any reason to open it.

Edward picked up our bags before I reached the stairs and stood waiting to follow me up. Bypassing my dad's room, I led him straight into mine and he placed my bag on the bed.

"Where should I put this?" he asked, raising up his own holdall.

"Anywhere will do," I said, taking a sip from my coffee cup.

He took a step back and half turned toward the open door. That movement brought me up short. Clearly, there was a notable difference between my father's small house and my even smaller apartment. In the former, Edward had a choice of rooms to sleep in.

And downstairs in the grocery bags, there was a little red box that he had attempted to leave on the shelf in the grocery store.

I put my coffee cup to my lips and took in too large a mouthful of coffee, only to find it was scalding hot. I had to swallow it down quickly to avoid the embarrassment of spitting it back out and my throat suffered dearly in the process.

"You could use my dad's room if you want," I said, but the instant the words were out of my mouth I wanted to choke them back. I didn't want him to use that room but it had little to do with wanting him in mine.

Edward frowned at me over his shoulder.

I turned to face the window and said, "It's okay, Edward. There's no need for you to sleep in my bed while we're here."

"Wherever I am in the house, Bella, I can assure you I won't be sleeping and I certainly won't stay anywhere I'm not wanted. I just need somewhere to put my things."

I took another more cautious sip of coffee. I knew I was being silly not answering him.

"Bella?"

I turned my head. "My room is closest to the bathroom," I said, as if that were any incentive.

He sighed and set his bag down just inside the door. "I'm trying to be a gentleman and not make assumptions. I am trying to give the lady a choice!"

Oh! He was giving _me_ the choice.

I put my cup down on the dresser, eased out the top drawer several inches and strode over to his bag. I crouched down, undid the zipper, took out a pile of his clothing and carried it back to put it in the drawer.

When I turned around to fetch some more, Edward was looking at me with one eyebrow arched and an upward curve on one side of his mouth.

"I… I want you to stay with me," I said quietly and then a bit louder, "We can not sleep together."

…

As it was, by the end of the of the day, Edward was safe from any molestation on my part, be it conscious or otherwise.

The sheer emotional effort it took to enter my father's bedroom and assess the amount of work needed to clear it left me shattered. I was barely able to eat the meal Edward had cooked for me before I dragged myself off to bed.


	18. Clearance

**18\. Clearance**

We tackled the closet and the dresser first. It wasn't easy and took far longer than I would have anticipated. Every shirt seemed to smell of my dad, even though they had to have been washed before they were put away and had been hanging there for over seven years.

After burying my face in a couple of his checked flannel shirts, I had to keep them. Edward purloined two or three good-as-new, plain T-shirts, but everything else was slowly sorted into either black plastic sacks for disposal or white plastic sacks for the clothing bank.

The bedside proved more difficult as it held his more personal items. In the top drawer, I found his wedding band, his wristwatch, a pair of gold cufflinks I'd never seen him wear and a small black box containing an engagement ring.

For a moment I thought it might have been my mother's, but Edward suggested, given the age and style, it might have been my grandmother's.

Several handkerchiefs, a silver pencil, a dented silver cigarette case and an engraved pocket watch without a chain joined the other precious items in an empty shoebox that I intended to take home.

The second drawer held a few fish related items – gag gifts, perhaps from his deputies or Harry – and an antiquated cellphone. All were discarded.

The bottom drawer contained a bundle of letters held together by a faded red rubber band from his parents to each other and a long flat box. I expected the box to contain another item of jewellery but, lifting the lid, I found instead a lock of chestnut brown hair tied with a thin pink ribbon.

"May I?" Edward asked. He took the box from me, raised it to his nose and inhaled. "Yours, I believe," he said.

My skin crawled at a vague and distant memory of my mother giving me my first ever haircut soon after I'd started elementary school because I kept bringing home 'little visitors.'

Tempting as it was to go through the plastic sacks one more time, I let Edward load them all into the bed of the truck and drive them away. I sunk into my father's recliner and fell asleep, only waking long enough to eat the remains of the previous evening's stew before Edward carried me up to bed.

Wednesday was dry but not sunny so, while I worked my way through the living room, Edward gathered some garden tools from the garage and began to tackle the front yard.

We'd been working independently for a couple of hours – me playing vinyl records on my dad's deck while I sorted through the boxes of old photographs and china in the sideboard – when Edward opened the front door and called for me.

"Bella, there's a police officer out here to see you."

I stood up, brushed myself down and went outside. Deputy Mark was standing with one hand resting on his holstered gun, eyeing Edward with a stern look on his face. When he turned to me, he looked genuinely surprised to see me there.

"Bella?"

"Hello, Deputy Mark," I said, smiling at him. He was a little greyer around the temples than I remembered.

Another officer exited the driving seat of the cruiser, rubbed at the small of his back and then ambled up the driveway. "Everything alright here, Bella?" he said.

"Steve!" I shouted, bounding down the steps. "It's been a long time."

He wrapped his left arm around me and pulled me into his side, almost as if he thought I needed protecting from something. I looked up at him. He too was scowling at Edward, who was slowly lowering the garden shears to the ground. I half expected him to raise his hands above his head and say, "Don't shoot!"

"This is my friend, Edward," I said. "He's helping me get the house in order."

Edward offered his right hand to Steve. "Good morning, Chief," he said. "I'm Edward Cullen."

Steve kept his arm by his side and narrowed his eyes. The atmosphere was a touch too chilly so I wound my arm around Steve's waist and guided him toward the open garage, beckoning Mark to join us.

"Could either of you make use of my dad's fishing gear?" I asked.

Inside the garage, both men's faces lit up at the array of rods, nets and tackle boxes.

"That's very kind of you, Bella," Mark said. "Are you sure you don't want to sell it?"

"He'd have preferred it went to his old fishing buddies."

"His name comes up at least once whenever we're on the riverbank," Mark said. "He's sorely missed."

I swallowed. "You can come by and collect it all when your shift is over if you like."

Mark opened one of the tackle boxes and poked around at the contents. "Are you selling the house?"

"I… I don't know. It needs some smartening up before I do anything with it, but this isn't the best time of year for that."

"I have a new deputy looking for somewhere bigger to live with her teenage son," Steve said. "A furnished property would suit her nicely. Would you consider renting it out?"

"I guess but I've no idea how to go about that."

"My wife still works in real estate," Mark said. "Would you trust us to organise it? We'd make sure you got a fair return and the guys down at the station would be more than happy to do the maintenance work for you come Spring."

"Thanks, Mark. I'd appreciate that."

"It's nice to be able to finally do something to help you, Bella," Steve said. "We tried, all those years ago…"

"I know," I said, blinking several times.

He looked over his shoulder. "You should be careful around that friend of yours."

"Edward? Why?"

His eyebrows shot up. "You don't know what he is?"

I looked out at the beautiful vampire trimming my dad's overgrown shrubs into perfect hedges with just a pair of garden shears. "He's the reason I'm finally able to clear the house."

"Ah. I see. It's like that, is it?"

I wanted to tell him that my dad had met Edward, that he had approved of him, but for obvious reasons I couldn't.

I gave Mark my contact details, promising to drop the house keys by the station before I went back to Port Angeles, and then I walked the men, who had once served under my father, back to their cruiser and said goodbye.

"They don't like that I'm here with you," Edward said as the cruiser pulled away from the curb.

"I guessed as much," I said, "but they don't know you like I do, do they?" He shook his head, but before he could protest I asked, "Is it wrong of me not to let go of the house?"

"Not if you're not ready or you think there might come a time when you would want it for yourself."

"Yeah," I said and headed back indoors to finish emptying the sideboard.

…

After another solid night's sleep, I spent Thursday cleaning the upstairs rooms and windows. On Friday morning, I repeated the process downstairs. And all the while, Edward hacked at the jungle in the backyard, disappearing at intervals in my truck to dispose of the garden debris and the boxes containing the unwanted remnants of my father's living room.

For the third week of October, it was remarkably mild, so I took my lunch break out on the back steps. Edward downed tools and came to sit beside me.

"Would you like to take a proper break?" he asked when I'd finished my grilled cheese sandwich. "I could take you for a run."

"Okay," I said.

I took my plate inside and grabbed my old, yellow rain jacket from the hook in the hall. After locking the back door, I climbed onto my waiting vampire, who set off at a leisurely pace across the backyard.

A few feet inside the treeline, he sped up, weaving in and out of the trees, jumping over roots and fallen branches, eventually coming to a standstill in a clearing that might have been a meadow at another time of year.

I lowered my feet to the ground and watched Edward flop back onto the grass.

"Join me," he said, patting the ground beside him.

"The ground is wet," I said, noticing the glisten on his hand.

"Use me as a mattress then." He grinned.

"You might live to regret this," I said, squatting with my feet either side of his thighs and, with his helping hands, lowering myself back onto his torso. I stretched my legs out on top of his and gazed up at the dull grey sky while he murmured in my ear, telling me of the things he'd discovered during his nightly forays into the forest.

His hands began to roam over my body, from my waist down to my hips and then back up to caress my breasts. I could feel him hardening beneath my backside as his hand snuck under the waistband of my pants.

Suddenly, I found myself flying through the air and landing on my feet with my back up against a tree. He tugged my pants down and sank his teeth into my left thigh. But the moment of bliss was over before it had started and he was running from me, leaving me standing in the forest with my pants around my ankles and a trickle of blood running down my leg.

"Please wake up, Bella."

Edward's lips were tickling my ear. I opened my eyes, took in my surroundings and would have clambered to my feet were it not for the strong arms encircling my chest and waist.

Realising I'd had an erotic dream while laying on top of the object of my desire was nothing less than mortifying. I was very much dressed and wearing an ugly, waterproof jacket that came down below my backside. If Edward had even tried to cop a feel, he'd have been hard-pressed to find my breasts through all the layers.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Shh," he said, flipping me over onto my front with minimal effort.

I put my hands beside his head on the damp grass and pushed myself up. Staring down into his dark eyes, a memory surfaced, a detail from my conversation with my landlady that night in the bookstore.

"Mrs C said I should let you turn me," I said.

His eyes widened. "You would want that?"

"I don't know. How would you do it?"

He raised his head and pressed his ice cold lips to my throat. "I'd have to bite you and inject you with my venom."

A shiver ran down my spine.

"Do you believe me now?" he asked, nuzzling just below my ear, his breath making my skin tingle.

But before I could even think about answering him, he'd turned his head to one side and said, "We're being watched."

He pointed to a tree and, following his finger, I caught sight of two flashes of yellow before Edward had us on our feet with me behind his back. I leaned around him to see an enormous wolf emerging from the trees. I gripped the back of his coat with both hands to hold myself upright while my heart rate went into overdrive.

"You're frightening her," Edward said. "Is that what you want? To scare her to death?"

The wolf's fur ruffled as if blown by a nonexistent breeze. I blinked once and, in that moment, the animal was replaced by a naked man. Had the wolf been an illusion?

"Jacob!?" I said, quickly pressing my forehead into Edward's back. Some things really can't be unseen. "Would you please put it away."

There was a rustling noise.

"He has some shorts on now," Edward said.

I came out from behind him and looked Jacob up and down. He was wearing the standard Rent-a-Wolf uniform of old cut-off jeans and nothing else. Even his feet were bare.

He did some kind of flexing thing with the muscles on his chest and abdomen, making them ripple. It smacked of male posturing and I couldn't decide whether to laugh or heave. I'd never found that kind of physique particularly attractive.

"I think I preferred the puppy," I muttered.

"Wolf, Bella," Jacob said. "I'm a giant wolf."

"Have you been watching us, Jacob?" I asked.

Edward leaned into me and said, "You've been gone for a few days. He came to investigate."

"Investigate?"

"He was worried that I had either killed you or changed you."

Jacob shrugged. "It's what they do, his kind."

"I don't get it," I said. "What happened to all that social tolerance? Is it all one-sided? Us humans have to keep an open mind and be respectful to those who are different from ourselves, but supernatural beings get a free pass?"

"I am human, Bella," Jacob said, his hands flexing at his sides.

"So is Edward."

"I'm really not," Edward muttered in my ear.

Jacob started shaking. "You're not still kidding yourself, are you? Take your head out of the sand, Bella, before it's too late."

"Whether I believe what I see or make excuses for it is neither here nor there. It's not about what you are, Jacob. It never has been for me."

"What are you doing with him, Bella? Me and my friends not good enough for you? I know you booked dates with everyone but Sam. One of them must have taken your fancy."

"I'm just not a dog person, Jacob. Never have been."

He clenched his fists and glared at Edward. "Why did you have to pick her? She was vulnerable and broken."

I took umbrage at that. I knew my friends meant well but I wished they'd stop interfering in my life.

"He didn't pick me," I said. "I picked him." And as soon as I'd said it, I realised how true it was, if not from the moment I signed the contract then every day since.

"What out of? A lineup?" Jacob smirked at his own joke.

"I picked him out at Rent-a-Vampire. Best ten thousand dollars I've ever spent." I turned to Edward. "I'm tired. Can you take me home now, please?"

He crouched down in front of me and I jumped onto his back, wrapping myself around him. I heard Jacob make a gagging noise and then we were speeding through the forest until Edward stopped just short of my dad's backyard and set me down.

"You paid ten thousand dollars? For me?" he asked.

"Isn't that enough?"

"I don't know. It sounds rather a lot. What's the going rate?"

"Don't ask me. I never even saw the price list. I just snatched a figure out of thin air. I certainly wasn't about to tell Jacob that I got you on discount, now, was I?"

"How much did you pay for me, Bella?"

"That's for me to know and you to wonder about."

He caught me in his gaze and did that thing. I was transfixed for a moment but then he laughed and broke the connection.

"Do I even want to know?" he said.

"Probably not." I grinned. So long as Alice didn't tell him, that was a secret I would take to my grave."


	19. Splitting

**19\. Splitting**

There was nothing more to be done. In my father's living room, I had amassed a small collection of boxes – the meagre sum of his life – to be taken home with me and subsumed into my own possessions.

The only item of furniture I wanted was the media cabinet and its contents. I'd enjoyed listening to my father's music while I'd sorted through his things. It gave me some sense of a connection with him, albeit tenuous.

After I'd cleared away the dishes from dinner, I poured the last of a bottle of red wine into a whiskey tumbler and walked into the living room. Edward was kneeling on the floor, leafing through the box of long playing records. I sat on the couch and watched him pull out the occasional album and read the back of the sleeve before returning it to the box.

His face and body held all the allure of a young man as yet unaffected by the rigours of life, but the grace of his movements seemed to belong to another era, much as his words did sometimes when he spoke.

Lost in his own thoughts, he was almost painfully beautiful to look at. Lost in mine, I yearned for him to touch me, to take off my pants, to bite my thigh and suck my blood.

"Are you feeling alright, Bella?" he said. "Your heart is going nineteen to the dozen." He sniffed the air and his irises darkened. "What are you thinking about?"

"My dream," I whispered. "It's been a while since I've had one like that."

"I'm afraid it hasn't," he said. "Today was just the first time this week I've been able to wake you."

"Oh." What on earth was happening to me?

"I rather hope I haven't made too big a dent in the local wildlife population. I would have hunted further afield but I didn't like to leave you alone too long in case you awoke and found me missing."

He dropped forward onto all fours and began to crawl toward me. I downed the rest of my wine.

"I've been finding it increasingly difficult to stay away from you, Bella," he said.

A shiver ran down my spine. "Because of my blood?" I said, hopefully.

He inched his way across the room. "Your blood, your mouth, your skin. I want to taste it all."

"Then why haven't you?"

"These past few days, it wasn't what you needed."

"I… I need it now."

He lifted his hands off the floor and kneeled in front of me, taking the empty glass from my hand and placing it on the coffee table.

"I'm scared of going too far," he whispered, "of losing control of my thirst, of my mouth, of my mind… I don't know if I can."

"I miss you feeding from me," I said. "I crave it, Edward."

"Is that what you were dreaming about in the clearing?" He put his hands on my knees and eased them apart. "Me feeding from you?"

"There was more to it than that," I said as he inserted himself between my thighs. "Once you'd bitten me, you left me alone in the forest, exposed and bleeding."

"I would never leave you for longer than necessary, Bella, and I would always come back if that was what you wanted."

I swallowed. His face was so close to mine it was making me giddy. "Until a week Wednesday," I said.

Our contract, our arrangement, would be over in less than a fortnight. There would be no reason for him to return after that. No obligation. No commitment. Although truth be told, he could have left at any time without redress.

He pressed his mouth to mine, the tip of his tongue poking out to lick my bottom lip. My skin tingled.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist and then I parted my lips. As his tongue slipped inside my mouth, his hands slid under my bottom, pulling me off the couch. I was vaguely aware of him standing and carrying me out of the room.

When he pulled away from the kiss, his forehead resting on mine, I was breathless. I dropped my feet to the ground and were it not for the tree behind my back, I would have lost my balance.

"Why are we out here?" I asked, looking around us at the moonlit forest.

"I wasn't sure if you would want to do this in your father's house," he said, "and it makes sense to be here. It will be easier for me to run after an alternate source of blood if I find myself losing control. The house is just across the yard behind you. We haven't come far."

I turned my head to the side and could just make out the light in the distance, shining out through the kitchen window.

His hands roamed over my body and he leaned in, running his nose up the side of my neck and along the line of my jaw to my ear. "Tell me if you start to feel too cold."

It was as if he'd read my mind. Just as in my dream, he tugged down my pants, dropped to his knees and sunk his teeth into my left thigh. I tilted my head back against the tree and pushed my hips forward, immediately aware of his nose pressing into my panties at exactly the right spot. I called out his name as he sucked at my blood and then again as he licked over the wound.

His tongue moved slowly up my thigh, higher and higher.

"Oh please, Edward!"

"Teeth. Can't risk it."

His tongue was replaced by his fingers as he rose up slowly, brushing his chest against the front of my body until we were face to face. He kissed me again, one hand inside my panties and one sliding up between us underneath my T-shirt and the fabric of my bra to caress my breast.

When my knees gave out, he held me in place and pulled my pants back up my legs. I reached for the button on his jeans but his hands were quick to wrap around my wrists and stop me.

"No, Bella."

"I just want to touch you." I rubbed the back of one hand along the fly of his jeans and he groaned. "Please, Edward. You won't hurt me."

After a minute or so, during which he appeared to be arguing with himself, he switched us around so that he was leaning against the tree with his arms wrapped backward around the trunk behind him.

Watching his face, I undid his button fly and slid one hand inside his jeans. It should have been strange touching the part of his body that should be full of blood, hot and pulsing, but I had gotten used to his body temperature over time. The chill of it only served to inflame my desire.

The thought was fleeting, but it did cross my mind that something so cold and so very hard might have the potential to break me in two just as Edward feared, assuming he could ever be persuaded to let things go that far between us.

He thrust his hips forward, allowing me to work his jeans down his thighs with one hand. His bare skin gleamed in the moonlight. While he looked down open-mouthed, I used both hands to show him what he'd been denying himself for so long.

"I didn't know it could feel this good," he whispered, "to have someone else's hands on me. Your hands."

Between watching his face and his erection in my hands, I had plenty to distract me from what his hands were doing, but I need not have looked for signs of his approaching orgasm. When the time came, he told me to step back and, thankfully, I listened.

All the while I'd been pleasuring him, he had been gouging deep grooves in the tree with his fingers and thumbs. When he let himself go and ejaculated onto the ground between us, the back half of the tree creaked and cracked and then crashed onto the forest floor, taking the branches of several other trees down with it.

Edward stood there, his jeans around his thighs, his chest heaving and his eyes wide open. He slowly unfurled his fists and shards of wood fell from his fingers like confetti.

"Am I glad that wasn't my headboard," I said.

He blinked and opened his mouth as if he were about to speak, but no sound came out.

I grinned at him and said, "You'd better put that monster away before you scare the animals." Then, I took off, jogging in the direction of the house.

Edward caught up with me halfway across the backyard and scooped me up. We both giggled as he carried me in through the backdoor and straight up the stairs to the bathroom.

"Are we going to shower together?" I asked.

"Best not." His good humour hadn't lasted long.

"What are you so worried about now? That I'll succeed in stealing your virtue?"

"I know what happened to Mrs C, Bella, and I don't want that outcome for you."

I stared at him. His eyes were bright red from my blood. "What outcome do you want for me?"

He blinked once and his eyes turned considerably darker. "I should hunt," he said. "I won't be long." And then he was gone.

It was close to midnight when, showered and changed, I padded back downstairs to the kitchen in search of a snack.

Edward must have expected me to go to straight to bed because he had turned off all the lights on his way out. Fortunately, I could see well enough with the moon shining in through the windows.

I opened the refrigerator door, picked out a shiny red apple from the salad drawer and sat down at the table. I had just bitten into the crisp, juicy flesh when Edward stole in through the backdoor, stark naked.

One sharp intake of breath combined with a mouthful of apple and I was choking. Edward strode across the room and hoisted me up out of my chair, pulling in on my diaphragm. The piece of apple shot out of my mouth onto the white linoleum floor.

"Thank you," I said, croaking more than speaking.

Still holding me close to his body with one arm, he rubbed between my shoulder blades. "For someone who professes to not believe in fairy stories, you go out of your way to re-enact them."

I huffed. "Why aren't you wearing any clothes?"

"My dinner was a little feisty."

"It's a wonder you have any clothes left."

"It is." He released me from his grip. "Might I suggest you avert your eyes now, Bella. I wouldn't want you to incur any further injury."

"It's not that big, Edward."

"You wound me, Bella. I'd swear I heard you call it a monster."

A minor whirlwind then blew through the kitchen. I swayed to and fro for a moment before I realised he'd gone. Deciding to forgo the remainder of the apple, I followed him upstairs.

Sleep came far too easily.

…

Edward waited in my loaded truck while I took one last look around my dad's house. Maybe it was silly to say goodbye to every room, especially when I had no immediate intention of selling it, but something told me it would never be my home again.

I locked the front door, walked down the steps and climbed in behind the wheel. I drove us across town to drop the house keys off at the police station for Mark and then pointed the truck in the direction of Port Angeles.

We were a mile or so beyond the edge of town when the vision in my right eye started to blur. I ignored it for as long as I could but I knew it was only a matter of time before my left eye would be afflicted by the same flickering flash of light.

I pulled over to the side of the road and cupped my hands over my eyes.

"Bella?"

"Migraine," I mumbled.

I heard the passenger door open and quietly close again. The door beside me then opened and I was pushed gently along the bench seat. The truck shook a little as Edward climbed back in and turned the key in the ignition.

"Should we go back to your father's house?" he asked.

"No," I said. "Let's get home."

After a few miles, my vision began to clear, but the return of my sight was accompanied by a sickening pain sufficient to knock me into the next week.

"Lie down," Edward said. "Put your head on my lap,"

Keeping my eyes closed, I leaned over until I was curled up on the bench seat, pressing my cheek onto the torn denim that covered Edward's thigh. He laid a freezing cold hand on my forehead. It wouldn't eradicate the pain but it was at least soothing.

"Mmm, that's nice," I mumbled, "but you really ought to keep both hands on the wheel."

"I'm quite capable of driving one-handed, Bella. You just rest."

That was the last thing I remembered.

…

I knew I was at home in bed from the faint scent of laundry detergent on the sheets and, when I pressed my face into the pillow, I could smell Edward. Had he been lying beside me?

The bed felt disgustingly damp and a little too warm. Why wasn't he in bed with me, cooling me down?

Whispers of the strangest conversation filtered through the thumping pain in my head. There were two voices – one male, one female.

"She said it was a migraine but this can't be normal. She's been asleep since yesterday morning."

"Migraines aren't that unusual for women. They come every few weeks or so, you know, when a woman is expecting her, um…"

"Yes, I'm aware of that but I'm not entirely convinced that that is what this is."

"What else could it be?"

"Venom."

"You've bitten her?!"

"No! Well, yes, but only ever with her consent. I've never actively forced my venom into her system or she would have… but maybe… from my teeth or my tongue…"

"Oh my God! You've been feeding from her. If you really believe that's the cause of this then perhaps it's best you leave."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"The only person that can send me away is her."

"You think she'd sue you for breaking some flimsy contractual agreement with a defunct escort agency?"

"No."

"Then I strongly suggest you pack your bags and get out of here right now. "

"I am beginning to regret letting you in. I thought you were here to make amends."

"I was but now that I've seen her like this… I'll give you a couple of days grace but if she isn't any better…"


	20. Turnaround

**20\. Turnaround**

The front door slammed shut. I groaned and cold hands were applied to the back of my neck and to my forehead. A cool breeze blew across my cheeks.

"Bella?"

"Need the bathroom," I mumbled.

Strong arms lifted me from my bed. I was set down on cold tiles, but one of the arms remained tightly wound around my waist, keeping me upright.

I could barely open my eyes, not that I wanted to. "Turn the light off."

"The light isn't on, Bella. I would pull down the blind but I'd have to let go of you do it."

"I'll be okay," I mumbled, swaying despite his support.

"She could have stayed and helped you with this."

"Who?"

"Angela."

"I'm past caring, Edward. Just do what has to be done and sit me on the toilet."

He tugged my panties down and gently lowered me onto the seat. I really didn't care whether he watched or listened, I just let go and emptied my bladder. I took the toilet paper that was thrust into my right hand and wiped myself.

I made a vain attempt to stand and pull my panties back up but had to rely on his assistance once again. He lifted and turned me, held my hands under running water and then dried them with a towel. He carried me back to the bed and propped me up with the pillows.

"Stay with me," I said, reaching for him when I felt him pull away.

"Always." I felt his cold lips on my forehead. "I just need to go to the kitchen."

The bed dipped on his return and I gingerly opened one eye. The curtains were closed so the room was dim. Nevertheless, I put a hand up to shield my vision.

Edward was holding a glass of water, which he brought to my lips. I took one sip. Then another. After the third mouthful, I put my hand on his wrist and directed the angle of the glass so I could drink more readily. I hadn't realised quite how dehydrated I had become.

"Could I have some more?" I asked.

"Of course. Would you like me to get you some pain relief too?" he asked.

"No. I just need you."

After the second glass of water, he helped me lie down on my back and laid a cold hand on my forehead while I closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

When I woke next, it was dark. Edward was tickling my cheek with his nose and softly calling my name over and over. I opened both eyes, relieved that the pain had finally abated.

"I can smell blood, Bella," he said. "Do you need me to help you to the bathroom?"

"Ugh! No, I think I can manage this time."

I put the lamp on and propelled myself up out of the bed in order avoid making a mess on the sheets, but I had to wait a few moments for my equilibrium to return before I could I shuffle over to the closet and fetch some clean panties.

In the bathroom, I stemmed the flow of blood that had brought an end to my migraine and cleaned myself up. I washed my hands and face, brushed my teeth and combed through my hair with my fingers. Aside from the dark circles under my eyes, I looked awfully pale and wan.

My stomach rumbled. I couldn't remember when I'd last eaten.

"What day is it?" I asked as I padded back to the bed.

"Monday."

"It's early."

"Yes, it's about two in the morning,"

"No, Edward. My period is early."

"Oh. Is that a bad thing?"

"Just a little unusual, that's all." My stomach rumbled again and he smiled. "Do we have any food in the house?"

"I do as it happens." His eyes wandered up and down my body while his smile widened into a toothy grin.

I bit my bottom lip. I wasn't really in a fit state for him to be feeding from me and yet the very thought of it had me reaching for his bite mark on my bare left thigh. His eyes followed the movement of my hand as my fingertips traced over the scar and his toothy grin promptly vanished.

"Food for human consumption," I said.

He shook his head and looked me in the eye. "Only what we brought back from Forks and what was in the freezer before we left."

"I'm starving."

"I'm on it," he said, jumping up from the bed.

Fifteen minutes later, I tucked into an onion, potato and (defrosted) spinach omelette the size of my biggest skillet. Every mouthful was as delicious as the first.

Edward leaned against the counter, watching me eat. When he took away my empty plate, I smiled up at him with as wide a smile as I could manage to show the full extent of my appreciation.

"Thank you, Edward," I said.

"Um, you have a bit of spinach stuck in your teeth."

I shut my mouth and rubbed my tongue along my teeth to dislodge the offending piece of greenery and then washed it down with the rest of my water.

"Did you and Angela talk while she was here?" I asked.

"A little," he said, setting the washed plate on the drainer. "Did we disturb you?"

"No, it's just that I heard voices and couldn't be sure if I was dreaming."

"She said she will come by again."

"Okay."

After another visit to the bathroom, I crawled back into bed, sniffing at the sheets and my T-shirt.

"Sorry about the smell," I said. "I must have gotten a little overheated."

"You did but the sheets don't bother me in the slightest, Bella." He pulled me toward him and buried his nose in my unwashed hair. "In fact, the more intense your scent the better."

I wasn't a hundred percent convinced on the body odour front but I applauded him for effort. Taking in a lungful of his scent, I wiggled my hand between us to undo a couple of his shirt buttons so I could feel his bare skin against my face.

"I'm sorry about the chill," he said.

"It doesn't bother me in the slightest, Edward." I undid another button and rubbed my cheek on his chest. "The more of your cold skin I can feel the better."

…

Normal service resumed on Monday morning. Well, Edward's level of service did anyway. I may have been a little slower to get started on my chores.

Thankfully, he had done most of the laundry before I woke up. The bed was stripped by the time I'd showered and dressed, and breakfast was ready and waiting on the table.

He had done well to scrape a meal together given that I had eaten most of the contents of the refrigerator in the middle of the night. He must have kept one egg back when making my omelette and found the two last remaining slices of bread in the bottom drawer of the freezer. The French toast was dusted with sugar, nice and crispy at the edges, fluffy in the middle and absolutely perfect with a cup of hot, black coffee.

At the grocery store, Edward steered the cart around the aisles and then right past my usual checkout boy toward an older man with a receding hairline. He proceeded to pack our bags with a close-lipped smile on his face.

As he loaded the shopping into my truck bed, I asked what had made him so happy, but he just tapped his temple and refused to let me in on the joke.

After lunch, I cooked a pot of chilli and some cornbread to restock my freezer for the week. Meanwhile, Edward cleaned the apartment and set up my father's media cabinet.

Once he had some music playing, he hauled me away from the stove and twirled me around the room with my feet on top of his. It was the most graceful I had ever been. If only my father could have seen me.

Edward hadn't left my side since my migraine had started and after our little dancing session, his eyes were almost black. And yet he waited until I'd had my dinner and got ready for bed before he announced his need to go out.

I dug around in the junk drawer until I found the spare key and gave it to him. He smiled, tucked the key into his ticket pocket and told me to lock up behind him.

I lay down with a book, trying to keep myself from falling asleep, but it wasn't working. I jolted awake several times to reread the same paragraph and once even had to retrieve the book from the floor. Eventually, sleep won out.

What time he came home, I couldn't say. When I dragged myself out of bed to use the bathroom an hour before dawn, though, Edward was already at work in the kitchen.

…

The unmistakable smell of old books hit me full force when I opened the front door of the bookstore. It was by far my most favourite of scents, although grilled cheese, tomato soup, coffee and chocolate provided some stiff competition. I took a moment to stand still and close my eyes while I breathed it all in, allowing it to transport me back in time.

Trawling through secondhand bookstores had quickly become a regular pastime when I started university. I had spent hours lost in my own solitary world of printed ink on yellowed paper, reading the words of others and dreaming of one day penning my own for someone else to read.

Another delicious scent wafted past me, drawing me back to the present. If I had to choose a single scent to fill my nostrils for the rest of my life, perhaps it wouldn't be old books.

Edward hung his coat up on the stand beside me. I leaned in his direction, inhaling just as he wiped his fingers along one of the bookshelves. My nose twitched, my chest tightened and I let out a loud sneeze.

Our first job of the day was to run a yellow cloth over the shelves and a broom across the floor. I had half a mind to wedge the front door open to let in some fresh air, but it was wet and windy outside and I didn't want to lose any of the scent that had first welcomed me in. Hopefully, it would appeal to other bookworms.

The old printer struggled to cope with the backlog of internet orders. Edward and I set to work on the first batch, giving the machine a chance to cool down before I printed off the next one.

We worked together until we had amassed four tote bags full of parcels, grateful to have had no interruptions, but no sooner had Edward taken the orders to the post office than Mike arrived with his lunch bag.

He settled himself into the battered leather armchair and took out a thick sandwich. By the smell of it, it contained roast chicken. I unwrapped the sandwich that Edward had made for me, inhaled deeply and took a large bite, doing my best to contain any audible signs of pleasure.

We had eaten half a sandwich each when Mike opened the conversation.

"How was your vacation, Bella?"

I frowned at him. "I was clearing my father's house, Mike. Didn't Jacob tell you?" He bowed his head and shook it. "Of course, he didn't. He didn't come to Forks to talk to me; he came to check on Edward."

"He was pretty agitated before he left and even more so when he returned," Mike said.

"You're none too pleased with my choices either, are you?"

"No, but for quite a different reason."

That was somewhat debatable but I thought it best not to stir up more trouble for myself. Instead, I addressed our last meeting.

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, Mike, or if I've ever given you false hope that we could be more than friends again."

He raised his head to look at me and sighed. "Angela has been telling me for years to move on; I just didn't want to listen to her. I thought that once you were over your bereavement…" He turned his head and looked out of the store window. "They've split up, you know."

"Who have?"

His eyes met mine as he turned his head again. "Angela and Jake."

"Why?"

"He was showing far too much interest in you and your esc— Edward, and something you said to Angela when you last met struck home. She feels pretty bad that she trusted Jacob's judgement over yours. So do I."

"She came to my apartment."

"Yeah, she told me. Was it really a migraine?"

"Yes, Mike," I said. "Just like the one I had last month.

He fidgeted in his seat. "You should let her know you're feeling better. Jacob has filled her mind with a lot of stories. After seeing you in that state and her conversation with Edward, she didn't know what to believe. Some of the things Edward said…"

"What things?"

"I've probably said enough. I ought to let her talk for herself."

He picked up his lunch bag and headed for the door, turning back to me before he'd pulled it open. "Do you want to be one of them?" he asked.

I knew what he was asking but I wasn't sure of my answer. "Would you still be friends with me if I was?"

"That kind of depends on your choice of diet, don't you think?"

He shrugged his shoulders and pulled up his collar, giving me a little wave before he hurried back to his own store. The bell clanged loudly behind him.

For a minute or two, I sat there dumbfounded, wondering what exactly Mike knew about the dietary choices of vampires and how he had come by such information.

While I finished my lunch, I typed an email to Angela. She must have been sitting at her desk because her reply was almost instantaneous. Back and forth we went until we had agreed to meet for lunch the next day – just the two of us.

Edward came back from the post office dripping wet and was followed in by our first customer of the day. The afternoon was busy but it grew quiet again around four o'clock when the rain got heavier.

At the end of the day, Edward brought the truck around to save at least one of us from getting drenched and we made our way home. He left the apartment late evening and, once again, I failed to stay awake long enough to witness his return.


	21. Telltales

**21\. Telltales**

We didn't often get children in the bookstore. A book-loving parent intent on a thorough examination of every shelf, and then once more around in case they had missed something, would more than likely be on the receiving end of some heavy duty whining. Either that or they would have to be very adept in the subtle art of bribery.

Alastair didn't tend to purchase many children's books unless they were first edition hardbacks with dustjackets and illustrations on printed plates, tipped onto a blank page.

But occasionally, a mother or father would bring in a precocious child, an advanced reader, to find them something topical to their interests, or merely to engender a lifelong love of books.

Wednesday morning's first customers of the day were a mother and daughter. Neither appeared to have noticed that Edward was different, although the woman did look his way more frequently and for longer than would be deemed normal. I couldn't blame her. Despite his ripped, black jeans and shredded, charcoal grey shirt, he looked exceptionally attractive to me too.

He was smiling more than usual, but then the little girl was sweet natured and very eager to have him read to her.

"This is a particular favourite of mine," he said and then he lowered his voice and started to read softly.

After a few minutes, I got up from my desk and stole through the store, circumnavigating the bookcases until I was near enough to the section with the single shelf of children's books to hear but not be seen.

"Real isn't how you are made…" Edward said, his voice fading into a whisper before it got louder again, "…REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Are you real, Mr Edward?" the little girl asked, interrupting the story. "Does someone really, really love you?"

My heartbeat picked up as I waited for Edward to answer her, but the mother announced it was time they went or else they would miss their appointment.

Through a gap between the bookcases, I could see the three of them together at the cash desk. Edward took the woman's money and gave her her change. He wrapped the book in a brown paper bag and handed it to the little girl.

His eyes followed her as she skipped toward the door, holding her mother's hand. He stepped out from behind the desk and, with inhuman alacrity, arrived at the door in time to open it for them. As soon as they had gone, he turned and looked in my direction as if he had known exactly where I was all along.

Still thinking of how much I would have liked to hear him answer the little girl's question, I walked back to my desk. "Do you want children, Edward?"

"What I want is irrelevant," he said, taking a step toward me.

"How so?"

"Vampires can't have children, Bella."

"Because they'd eat them?"

"Because our bodies are frozen at the point of change. To all intents and purposes, we are dead."

"So if we were to… you know… I wouldn't get pregnant?"

He shook his head.

I stared at him for a minute. "I'm sure I read something years ago in one of Angela's books about a male vampire impregnating human women."

He sighed. "The Incubus. Do you also remember reading how those wretched women were torn to shreds by their own offspring, during childbirth?"

"It's true?"

"I believe so, yes."

"You wouldn't want to try?"

"No. I would not want the woman I love above all others to endure that kind of vile torture and certain death."

"No matter how much you wanted a child?"

"Do you really believe that I could be that selfish and sadistic?" His tone was sharp.

"No." I looked down at my feet. My eyes were smarting.

"Have you changed your mind about wanting children, Bella?"

I shook my head but didn't look up.

"The subject is moot then, isn't it? You need to go. Angela will be waiting for you."

When I raised my head, he was nowhere in sight and I couldn't help feeling I was missing something.

I fetched my cloak, draped it around my shoulders and collected my purse from behind the cash desk.

"I didn't mean to upset you," I whispered and then I opened the door and walked outside. The loud clang of the bell above the door reverberated in my ears while I crossed the street.

…

Angela was waiting for me in our favourite booth by the window, staring into space. She jumped when I slid across the leatherette bench seat on the opposite side of the table.

"Oh hi," she said, putting her hand to her chest. "I've ordered already. Hope that's okay."

"Yeah, thanks," I said, nodding. She knew what my usual was.

"You're looking a lot better than when I last saw you."

"Damned hormones," I said, rolling my eyes.

"It sucks to be female, right?" Her laughter was hesitant. "Are we okay now, you and I?"

"I… Of course." I smiled at her and she shook her head.

The waitress arrived with our order - two plates of sandwiches, a soda for Angela and a mug of black coffee for me – and set it all down on the table. I picked up my knife and cut my sandwich into quarters.

"I shouldn't have listened to him," Angela said, copying me. "I'm so sorry."

"Some of what Jacob told you might hold some truth, if not of Edward then of others like him. I just wish the three of you had taken the time to get to know him before you made assumptions. But who am I to talk? I'm still struggling with the whole concept of the supernatural."

"You still think Edward is human?"

"He is human, or he was once." I looked across the street at the bookstore. "He might not be the same as us but he's not that dissimilar either. Not on the inside."

"You care about him."

I nodded.

"Are you in love with him?"

"I don't do lo-"

The word caught in my throat on seeing Edward appear in the bookstore window, his eyes looking directly into mine as his hand reached for a book from the display. He turned back to his customer – an elderly gentleman with a walking stick – and they moved out of view.

I turned back to Angela, realising I'd missed some of what she was saying.

"…will get to know him. You're right. It's what I should have done before I allowed Jacob's opinions to colour my own."

"It doesn't matter anymore," I said. "He'll be leaving soon."

"Why? Have you told him to go?"

"The contract ends a week today at midnight."

Her eyebrows disappeared down behind the thick rim of her glasses as she took a bite out of her sandwich. I looked down at my sandwich and wished someone else had made it. I wanted spinach leaves in between the layers of cheese instead of roasted red peppers and artichokes.

We ate in silence for a while, but no sooner had Angela finished her last mouthful than she resumed our conversation.

"Mike said you were tricked by the agent."

I swallowed my mouthful and took a sip of my coffee to wash it down. "We both were."

"The fact that Edward stayed must count for something then."

"I'd paid for his time and he couldn't get me my money back. Besides, he told me he had nowhere else to go."

"And you believed that? Vampires don't need the comforts of modern living, Bella. Granted, they might like them but they can manage fine without."

"I didn't know that, though. I thought he was playing a part."

"Some actor!"

"I think I've hurt him," I whispered.

"How could you possibly have hurt him? He's a vampire."

"It's such a silly thing but, then again, maybe it isn't. I watched him with a little girl in the store today and asked him if he wanted children. At first, he said vampires can't have children, but then I remembered that book of yours and–"

"Please tell me you did not offer to have his baby!"

"Not as such, but–"

"It would kill you, Bella."

"That's what he said. In any case, he already knows how I feel about having kids, but that's not the point. I may have pressed the subject a little too far. I was insensitive."

"Ben couldn't have children."

"What?"

"Ben couldn't have children. It's why we broke up."

"But that was years ago when I was… I wasn't really there for you, was I?"

She shook her head. "You were, as much as I let you be."

"But I thought it was all your decision."

"It was just one of those things. I was young and foolish and I let him push me away."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You had your own problems to contend with."

"And now you've broken up with Jacob because of me."

She fixed her eyes on mine and shook her head again. "Because of him, Bella." She sighed. "It wouldn't have lasted anyway. He wasn't Ben. None of my boyfriends have ever been able to fill his shoes."

"No." I winked at her. "They'd have had to have cut their toes off first."

She smiled. "Not even then."

"Perhaps you should try to contact him."

"I've thought about it but I don't know. Back then, I had no idea what I had. The potential for lifelong happiness was right there in front of me and instead of fighting for it, I just walked away and pretended it didn't matter."

She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. I pushed my plate to one side and looked over at the dessert counter.

"It may be short term," I said, "but I can see the solution to all our problems on that glass cake stand over there. My treat."

While we gorged ourselves on generously cut wedges of chocolate layer cake, we chatted about my week in Forks and Angela's recent photo assignment. When her lunch hour was up, we paid our check and went our separate ways.

Once I'd crossed the street, I turned around to look for my friend. She was about to get into her car so I called out her name. She held on to the top of the open door, looking this way and that until she'd spotted me waving at her.

"If I don't see you before," I shouted over the noise of the passing cars, "I'll see you next week at your party."

She frowned and cupped her hand to her ear.

"See you on Halloween!" I shouted, emphasising each word.

She smiled and nodded, got into her car and drove away. I pushed open the door to the bookstore and found Edward sitting on the floor in the middle of a large delivery from Alistair.

"Nice lunch?" he asked.

"Yes, thanks. Let me just use the bathroom and I'll come and help you."

We spent the rest of the afternoon – give or take customer interaction – sorting the books into categories and then reboxing them. It would take some time for me to price them all and add them to the online catalogue. I'd barely made a start before it was time to go home.

That evening, soon after Edward had left the apartment, I put a sweater on over my pyjamas and slipped my feet into my boots. I grabbed my keys, stepped outside onto the top step and locked the door.

Even with the aid of the security light, the moonlight and the street lamps, I could see no sign of Edward, so I walked down the steps and around to the front of the building. As I raised my hand to knock on Mrs C's door, it opened with the spookiest of creaking sounds and there stood the lady herself.

"Would you like me to get Edward to put some oil on those hinges?" I asked.

"I quite like it, dear." She smiled. "Do come in."

I followed her into the lounge and took a seat on one of the two armchairs beside the fireplace. She sat down on the other one.

"Are you warm enough?" she asked. "Would you like me to turn the fire on?"

There was a chill in the apartment that I'd never noticed before, perhaps because I was almost always dashing in and dashing out again with my laundry.

"I'll be fine," I said, pulling my sweater sleeves down over my hands.

"You're still human."

I frowned. "Shouldn't I be?"

"When you asked if you could close the store, I did wonder if that was about to change, if maybe that was the real reason you wanted to go away."

"No, I really did need to sort out my father's house."

"Where's Edward?"

I tensed. "He went out."

"Hunting?"

"So he said."

"He's an interesting one your young man, killing animals when human blood is so much easier to come by."

"Is that what Alistair drinks?" I asked. "Human blood?

"Oh yes, dear. As I said, your Edward is unusual." She smoothed the fabric of her skirt out over her left thigh. "He found it difficult with me at first. Sex and sustenance had always gone hand in hand for him. Not one of his previous lady friends got a second chance."

"What was so different about you?"

Her eyes lit up. "He fell in love with me, although it took him a while to both feed from me and make love to me at the same time. Still, we had a lot of fun building up to it and then nothing could stop us until… well, you know that story."

"Why didn't he make you like him?"

She turned her gaze to the old gas fire. "At first he was torn. A part of him wanted to protect me from the more sordid side of his nature. Back then, vampires were stuff of myth and legend. They weren't allowed to reveal their true selves to anyone who might survive to tell the tale.

"And he was petrified. He'd never created another vampire. He'd never sunk his teeth into anyone and stopped before me. And he was solitary by nature. He had no one from whom he could seek advice."

She turned to me again, the warm smile on her face fading as she spoke.

"I was thirty-five and recently widowed when he came into my bookstore. He lit up my world and continued to set me ablaze for another ten years, Bella, but we left it too late. It was fortunate that I had changed my will and left my store and my home to him, otherwise I would never have been able to stay here like this all this time."

Hot tears splashed down onto my freezing cold hands. I was shivering.

"I should go to bed," I said, pushing myself up out of the chair.

Mrs C followed me to her door and leaned forward to place a cool, feather-light kiss on my cheek. "Goodnight, dear," she said. "Sleep tight. Don't let the bedbugs bite."

I sniffled and forced a smile. Bedbug bites were the least of my worries.


	22. Betoken

**22\. Betoken**

The sun was streaming in through the gap between the curtains, throwing a shaft of bright light across my face. I blinked a few times and rolled onto my back, throwing an arm over my eyes.

"Good morning," Edward said, sounding entirely too cheery.

"What time is it?"

"Not quite eight."

I groaned, threw my legs over the side of the bed and sat up. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, stretched my arms up above my head and then turned around to look at Edward.

He was lying on the opposite side of the bed, his leg nearest to me bent at the knee and his foot flat on the mattress. The rips in his jeans were gaping and in the space between the open plackets of his cotton shirt, I could see that his T-shirt was riddled with holes.

"Edward," I said, "take off your shirt."

"Why?"

I waved my hand at him. "Let me see."

He sat upright, slithered out of his cotton shirt and dropped it to the floor. I kneeled on the bed, putting my hand on his shoulder to make him lean forward, and gasped. The back of his T-shirt was completely shredded.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Two mountain lions."

"Two?!"

"The male didn't much like me chasing after his mate."

"Take it off!" I said, pulling at his sleeve.

He tugged on the neckband at the front of his T-shirt and tore the entire garment from his body.

"Was that really necessary?" I muttered.

He shrugged. "It was ruined anyway."

I stared at the smooth, flawless skin of his bare back and then, unable to resist, I ran the flat of my hand up his spine from just above the waistband of his jeans to the nape of his neck. He caught my hand there and held it in place while he turned his face in my direction.

"Where are the scratches?" I whispered.

"Mountain lions can't hurt me, Bella. Only another vampire could break my skin."

His face was so close to mine, I could have leaned in and kissed him – if only he hadn't jumped off the bed and left me swooning in the middle of it.

"You need to get ready for work," he said.

"And you need some new clothes."

"I do." He ran his hand through his hair and as it dropped back to his side, it caught the shaft of sunlight that was coming in through the gap in the curtains, sending tiny beams of light in all directions. He shifted to one side and the light display was over.

"You won't be coming in today, will you?" I said as I clambered off the bed and made my way to the bathroom.

"Not while the sun is out, no."

I sighed. "I'll leave you my credit card. If you ever make it out of your coffin, you can go hunting in the thrift store."

…

While I spent the day pricing and cataloguing books, the sun shone through the store windows, highlighting the myriad of dust motes floating in the air.

Whereas Edward was hiding indoors back at my apartment, our customers must have been out enjoying the brief glimpse of good weather before the rain made its inevitable return. The only person to open the front door all morning was a woman asking for directions.

Mike broke the monotony of the day when he arrived for lunch, bearing the gift of a giant chocolate chip cookie. When he'd finished his sandwich, he flipped through one of the books on my desk that I'd yet to put on a shelf – a book about the influenza pandemic during the Great War.

As I took my first bite of cookie, I glanced at the front cover of the book in Mike's hand. It was a depressing image – a row of hospital beds set too close together, knobbly limbs under blankets and an almost ghostly figure of a nurse hovering in the background. Only in the foremost bed could a man's face be seen, his long hair slicked back off his forehead and his eyes sunken and dark.

I reached for my water and took one careful sip after another, trying desperately to hide my shock.

"Aren't you going to eat all your cookie, Bella?" Mike asked, dropping the book back onto the desk with a thud.

"I think I'll save the rest for my afternoon tea," I said, putting my hand to my chest, "so I can savour it properly."

Mike stood up and placed a clammy hand on my forehead. "You're not getting one of those migraines again, are you?"

"I'm fine," I said, barely succeeding in allowing him to express his concern without recoiling.

"You look like you've seen a ghost."

I was fine with ghosts, that much I knew; it was pictures of people who should have been long since dead from Spanish Influenza that I had problems with.

"I've spent too long in front of this computer," I said, pushing my chair back and standing up. "It's time I put these books on their shelves."

Mike took his cue and left, smiling and waving through the window as he walked back to his store.

Edward finally made an appearance about an hour after the clouds had moved across the sun. I was sitting at my computer once more, processing a pile of books from one side of my desk to the other.

"Hi," I said, once the bell had finished clanging.

"Good afternoon, Bella."

"Did you go to the thrift store?"

"Yes. I dropped everything back at your apartment. I'll give you the fashion show later."

Somehow I doubted that. I focused on the screen, vaguely aware of Edward perching himself on the arm of the battered leather chair.

We continued that way in silence, bar the ticking of the old clock on the wall, until it was time to take the day's orders to the post office. I rolled my shoulders to ease out the tension in my neck and turned off my computer. I took the keys out of my desk drawer, stood up and gathered together the tote bags, setting them down on the floor by the coat stand.

I locked the cash register, switched off the desk lamp and fetched my purse. Then, I turned back to Edward to see he had his head buried in the very book Mike had been flipping through earlier.

"Would you like to bring that with you?" I asked.

He looked up at me and closed the book. "Please."

"Did you notice anything strange about the cover?"

He looked down at it and then back at me, one eyebrow raised. "Did you?"

"Nope, nothing at all," I said, wrapping my cloak around my shoulders and pulling the door wide open.

Before the bell had even finished assaulting my eardrums, Edward had donned his coat, scooped up the tote bags and strode out onto the street, his reading book tucked under his arm. I switched off the lights and locked the door, and together we made our way down the dark side alley to my truck.

Another evening went by with Edward disappearing off into the night alone. Another night went by with me fast asleep before, during and after his return.

For someone who had always been so happily governed by routines, I was beginning to hate the newest addition. And it was just as well I hadn't expected that fashion show because I would have been sorely disappointed.

Other dashed hopes and expectations were another matter entirely.

…

The second delivery of books in so many days arrived early on Friday morning, not long after we'd opened the store.

While Edward made me a coffee, I switched on the computer and then went to inspect the group of grubby, white boxes in front of the cash desk.

"Oh!" I said.

"What?"

"Where was Wednesday's consignment from?"

"Chicago," he said, walking toward me, mug in hand.

"And this one was from St Louis."

He nodded and handed me the mug. "So?"

"When I first started working here, the boxes didn't come from that far afield. They were mostly from neighbouring states. It took the best part of a year before I got the first delivery from New York and, ever since, they have come from northeastern university towns."

"Chicago and St Louis both have excellent universities," he said.

"That's not the point, Edward." I sipped my coffee. "It would appear Alistair is finally heading toward home and crossing the state lines at a much faster rate than he did on his outward journey."

I walked over to my desk and set my mug down. I gathered up a pile of books from the box on the floor and got ready to start pricing them.

Edward came over and stood by my side. "You must have been quite curious about his movements to have noticed that all the towns he's shipped from have universities."

"I just happen to know where all the good universities are." I opened the book in my hand and pencilled the price on the top right-hand corner of the title page. "I even considered applying to a few of them at one point in time."

He took the book out of my hand and leafed through the pages. "And you haven't ever wondered why he would choose those towns and cities in particular?"

I picked up another book and opened it. The pages were old and spotted, and on the inside cover, there was an ex libris label. The name on it had been written in blue ink, but something had been spilled on the page and the ink had smudged. The first name began with either an F or an E, the surname could have been Pratt.

"That's where the better book collections are, I suppose," I said, tapping at my keyboard. "All those aged academics must leave sizeable libraries behind when they bite the dust. Maybe their relatives don't see the true value of what they've inherited, just the quick buck they can make from clearing a room in one fell swoop."

"Hmm. I wonder if Alistair has a taste for aged academics."

I glared up at him. "The very idea! A bookseller would never hasten the death of a potential customer!"

"A vampire has to eat." He licked his lips and leaned toward me, but his playful mood soon evaporated.

He inclined his head to one side, placed the book back down on the desk and walked toward the door, opening it just in time for a rather attractive, blonde boy who was equal to Edward in height.

"May I help you?" Edward asked.

The boy stared at him and muttered something under his breath.

Edward's eyebrows drew closer together. "Follow me," he said and the pair wandered off into the maze of bookcases.

From the snippets I overheard, they were seemingly in deep conversation about a subject that held absolutely no interest for me whatsoever. I'd been more than happy to leave mitosis and blood typing behind in Mr Banner's lab when I finished high school. After all, who in their right mind would ever want to study Biology?

"Riley, here, is asking for a student discount, Bella. Do we offer one?"

I looked up from my work, surprised to see them both in front of my desk. The blond boy was standing side on to me, holding a small stack of biology books in his arms. His pupils were enlarged and his mouth stretched wide into a beaming smile that was directed solely at Edward.

Edward was also smiling but his expression had more of an air of professional courtesy about it than one of genuine feeling. With the exception of a couple of swift glances to his right, his eyes were firmly fixed on mine.

"Twenty percent through October," I said, "provided the customer has student identification."

"I do," Riley said without shifting his gaze for one second.

Edward politely waved Riley toward the cash desk, but when his customer refused to move, Edward was forced to lead the way himself. Riley immediately lowered his gaze, waiting until Edward had rounded the desk before he followed him.

I sucked my lips in between my teeth and bit down, pretending to return to my own task. Meanwhile, I covertly watched Riley make every flirtatious effort possible to break Edward's resolve. It was all I could do to wait until the boy was out of sight before I burst out laughing.

"It's not funny, Bella," Edward said, walking over and slumping into the battered leather armchair.

"Did he proposition you?" I sniggered.

"In a manner of speaking."

"Oh my! Did he touch you?"

He shifted in his seat. "He tried."

"Where?"

"In the Science section. Where else?"

I groaned. "What part of you did he attempt to touch?"

Edward looked down at his lap. "I'd rather not say. It wasn't so much what he tried to do as what he was thinking when he did it."

"Really? What was he thinking?"

"I am not about to put myself through the indignity of spelling it out for you, Bella."

"No," I muttered, suddenly losing my sense of humour. "Perish the thought that you would engage in a conversation with me about sex."

He sat up and put his hands on the arms of the chair. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what it–"

But I didn't get a chance to finish my explanation because Mike, with his impeccable sense of timing, pushed open the front door and poked his head in. He glared up at the clanging bell above him, waiting for it to stop.

"I'm glad you're both here," he said, stepping in a little further. "Bella, could you do me a favour and mind my store? My assistant has gone and cut her hand on a hunting knife and she'll more than likely need stitches. I'll have to take her to the medical centre."

I looked at Edward and he nodded in resignation. I fetched my cloak from the coat stand and followed Mike outside. His poor assistant was already waiting in his car, her hand wrapped in a blood-soaked bandage and her face ashen.

Mike handed me the keys to his store and climbed in beside her. "Thanks, Bella," he said and then he shut the door and drove away.


	23. Spoilsport

**23\. Spoilsport**

The first thing that hit me when I opened the door to Mike's sporting goods store was the relative silence. Unlike the bookstore, there was no bell clanging above my head, nor a more modern buzzer, just the swish of the door opening and soft whoosh as it shut behind me. It would have been easy for a customer to enter unnoticed.

The store smelled strongly of leather, rubber and wax. There was also an unfortunate whiff of rusted iron in the air and that could only mean one thing: Mike hadn't gotten around to cleaning up the blood before he'd come to get me.

I began to feel a little nauseous.

Behind the counter, I found the guilty hunting knife lying in a puddle of blood on the floor beside a blood-spattered, half-opened cardboard box of fishing tackle.

Mike had always favoured using his knife to cut through packing tape; I preferred scissors. Even then, I had managed to draw my own blood on more than one occasion and so had in turn given Mike plenty of opportunities to practice his first aid skills with antiseptic wipes, butterfly strips and bandages.

The door beside the counter led to the storeroom and staff rest area. I retrieved some toilet tissue, which I hastily stuffed up my nose, and then hunted around for Mike's cleaning supplies. Bleach in hand, I went back into the store and set to work mopping up the bloody mess.

Once I'd cleared up, I straightened up the counter and faced the front of the store. The fluorescent strip light immediately above the entrance flickered on and off. I glared at it, counting the seconds between each blip, knowing that it would undoubtedly induce a headache if Mike took too long.

It had been a few years since I'd been an employee in the Newton's original store in Forks, so I wandered around to acquaint myself with the stock. I soon found my stride when the first customers came in and even managed to make a couple of sales.

My stomach started rumbling around midday and I wished I had brought my sandwich with me. I rummaged under the counter to see if Mike still hid his cookies under there and was lucky enough to strike gold. In a chipped and dented tin labelled fish bait, there was an unopened packet of chocolate chip cookies.

After eating three of Mike's secret stash, I rounded the counter to straighten up a dishevelled rail of waterproof jackets. The task had the added benefit of allowing me to turn my back on the failing strip light. I had a heavy jacket in each hand when the door swished open behind me.

"Still human I see."

It wasn't the first time I'd heard that that week. Recognising the voice, I hung the jackets back on the rail and turned around. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Things seemed pretty intense between you and your escort in the clearing. I assumed your change was inevitable."

"Well, you assumed wrong, didn't you, Jacob?"

"So I see." His eyes raked up and down my body. "Perhaps he just likes playing with his food."

I sighed. "Why are you here?"

"I came to see Mike. Where is he?"

"Out on an errand. Can I take a message?"

He shook his head and turned toward the door with his arm outstretched. "You want to be like him, don't you?"

"Mike? No, I'm just minding his store."

"Don't play me for an idiot, Bella."

"I don't know," I said.

"If you stay with him there can only be one of two outcomes."

"I know."

With his hand still on the door handle, he turned his head to face me. A single tear trailed down his cheek. "Either way, your heart will stop beating and you'll be dead."

"That's not quite true."

His jaw clenched and his eyes flashed. They seemed bigger than normal and, for a brief moment, they appeared to turn bright yellow, but then he was standing directly under the flickering fluorescent light.

He let go of the door handle and took a step toward me. The air around him seemed to shimmer and his lips curled back into a snarl, revealing his slightly yellowed teeth.

How had I not noticed those long, pointy canines before?

I took a step back and placed the flat of my hand over my pounding heart. He cocked his head to one side as if he were listening to the change in its rhythm.

"Your heart _will_ stop, Bella," he said. "If he stops himself in time, the only blood running through your veins will have come from a donor – willing or otherwise. If he doesn't stop…"

He took another step toward me and I took another step back. My back hit the edge of the counter. I had nowhere else to go.

"Jacob," I said, my voice cracking. "You're scaring me a little."

"What has he done to you, Bella? You've never subscribed to the supernatural before. You wouldn't even look at me when I tried to show you what I am, but here you are, buying into his idea of eternal life."

"I'm–"

"Are you sure you're ready to throw away your humanity?" He leaned toward me so that when he spoke I could feel his hot breath on my skin. "Do you let him kiss you, Bella?"

He lowered his head, his face so close to mine we were almost touching. I craned my neck, trying to get as far away from him as possible.

"You never once kissed me, Bella. Why was that?"

"I'd sooner have kissed a frog," I mumbled, turning my head so his lips brushed over my cheek and not my mouth. Nevertheless, the heat of his skin on mine turned my stomach.

I put my hands on his chest but I hadn't realised quite how cornered I was. His hands were already on the counter either side of my waist, so instead of pushing him away, I found myself bending backward.

He ran his muzzle up and down my neck, sniffing and snuffling. "Mmm. You smell good enough to eat."

"That would be the three chocolate chip cookies I stole from Mike's tin," I said, my voice wavering.

He dragged his long, wet tongue from the base of my throat up to under my left ear. Bile rose up into my mouth.

"You should never have ventured into the woods, Bella, and you certainly shouldn't have strayed off your well-beaten track of oblivion, but now that you have…" He pulled back to give me a toothy leer, his large hands running up my sides and around my back. "Now that I have you in my arms, I'm going to show you what you've been missing and then I'm going to eat you all up!"

An icy chill blew through the store as the door swished open behind Jacob, but he was so close and so huge, he completely obscured my view.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt," Edward said. "I thought you might be hungry, Bella, so I brought you your sandwich."

"Another minute and you'd have needed to bring an axe," I muttered.

Jacob dropped his arms back down to his sides and straightened up. He blinked a few times, his eyes flashing yellow again before they reverted to their usual dark brown. He rolled his shoulders, turned around and strode casually past Edward out of the store.

My tall, bronze-haired vampire was a welcome sight indeed, standing as he was underneath that damned, flickering fluorescent light. He held up the brown paper bag containing my grilled cheese sandwich and narrowed his eyes.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

My chest expanded and I let out a sigh of relief. "Yeah. I suppose you were listening in?"

"Not intentionally but his thoughts are very loud."

"Care to share?"

"I suspect you got the gist of it already. Come on," he said, taking my elbow and guiding me around the counter. "You look like you need to sit down. I'll fetch you some water."

I perched my bottom on the high stool, resting my feet on the metal rung and my forearms on the countertop. Edward placed the brown paper bag down beside me.

"Did you lock the store?" I asked.

"Of course," he said, patting his jeans pocket. I heard the faint clink of the keys knocking together.

He pushed open the door to the storeroom and disappeared for a moment, coming back with a chilled bottle of water from Mike's refrigerator and setting it on the counter. I unscrewed the cap and took a few sips, but it did nothing to take the burn of the swallowed bile away.

Edward tore open the brown paper bag and handed me half of the grilled cheese sandwich. I looked up into his face but he quickly averted his eyes.

Something was off.

"Are you angry with me?" I asked.

"No." There was an edge to his voice that hadn't been there before.

"I didn't kiss him," I said. "I mean, he was trying to kiss me, but I didn't want him to. I don't want that. Ever."

"I know, Bella."

"Then why do I get the feeling you are angry with me?"

"Because I am angry, Bella. I'm seething, but not with you. That dog had his hands all over you, his tongue on your neck, his body pressed up against yours…"

He thumped a fist down on the counter, sending the pencil pot flying. I watched as one by one the pens and pencils all rolled over the edge and dropped onto the floor.

"Why didn't you say anything when you came in?" I asked. "Why didn't you do anything to him?"

He grimaced. "And have him go wolf in a confined space right next to my–" He paused and let out a breath. "He knew I would never do anything to endanger your life."

"That's not what he said to me."

"What that dog says and what he thinks do not necessarily marry up. He is at one with his wolf – wily, calculating and manipulative. He doesn't want to risk a fight with me if he can dispose of me some other way."

I swallowed. "Dispose of you?"

"He wants me gone."

"From where exactly?"

"His territory."

"Port Angeles is his territory?"

He looked at me pointedly and the penny dropped. "He just all but pissed on my leg, didn't he?"

He sniffed and wrinkled his nose. "Yes."

Edward leaned back against the counter and stared into space, his fists sporadically clenching and unclenching while I slowly ate my sandwich.

"You should get back," I said once I'd finished eating.

"Will you be alright?"

"I know where you are if I need you."

A man and a woman came in through the door, laughing at something. They turned their smiles toward us and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Can I help you?" I asked, hopping down off the stool. I mouthed a thank you to Edward, who nodded and left quietly.

About an hour later, Mike and his patched-up assistant returned. She went straight out back to stow her purse and jacket.

"I found your cookies," I said to Mike as I made my way to the front door.

He laughed. "That doesn't surprise me."

"But I only ate three."

He grinned. "Now that is a surprise! Are you feeling okay?"

I gave him a mock glare. "I'm fine, no thanks to your blinking light. You need to get that fixed." I pulled the door open, breathing in the refreshingly cold air before turning back. "Jacob came to see you."

"He did? I told him to give us some space."

"Us?"

"You, me, Angela… and Edward."

"You did?"

"Yeah. Looks like I'll have to repeat myself."

I didn't know what to say so I just waved Mike goodbye and went back to the bookstore.

By the end of the day, I'd pretty much finished pricing and cataloguing the first of that week's consignments. In between attending to customers, Edward had dutifully found a home for each and every book.

All the while, in the back of my mind, I kept going over what had happened with Jacob. He'd never been that pushy before so why now? And why did I not stomp on his foot or shove my knee firmly into his groin?

Would he have backed off if I'd informed him that in a just few more days he wouldn't have to worry about Edward anymore, that the contract would be up and Edward would be gone?

The very thought of Edward's departure created a sizeable knot in my stomach that I found hard to ignore.

Once again, we made our way home and once again, Edward departed, but he did at least cook me a dinner first while I was scrubbing myself clean in the shower.

As I cut into my steak, the blood pooled on the plate. My mouth watered at the sight of it, which seemed extraordinary considering my reaction to the blood in Mike's store earlier in the day. I polished off the meat, potatoes and salad with a very large glass of red wine and then licked every last drop of blood off my plate as if I'd been starved of sustenance for days.

Later that evening, I lay in bed alone and a little bit tipsy, staring at the front cover of the book about the influenza pandemic. The man in the foremost hospital bed was most certainly Edward. His eyes may have been sunken and his face drawn from illness, but the shape of his nose, his cheekbones, his jawline and his lips – those features were unmistakable.

He knew it – of course he did – and I knew it, not that I would ever admit it out loud. I probably didn't need to.

I rolled onto my back, my hand finding its way down to my left thigh. I rubbed at the slightly raised bumps where Edward's teeth had permanently marked my skin and then trailed my fingers up to the edge of my panties.

It had been a week since he'd last fed from me, a whole week since we'd last been sexually intimate. Other than to tend me through my migraine, he'd not spent a night in my bed since. He'd barely even laid a finger on me.

I didn't like it one bit.

I tried so hard to stay awake, but the emotional exhaustion of the day finally caught up with me. Or maybe it was the second large glass of red wine I'd poured myself in Edward's absence.

Either way, sleep prevented me from witnessing Edward's return one more time.


	24. Ambush

**24\. Ambush**

Most people like a bargain and when a store offers a generous discount, word soon spreads.

That Saturday morning, we were inundated by a constant stream of young, mostly male students from the community college, searching for out of print reference books.

As the hours went by, it became apparent that very few of the students, if any, were interested in buying the books on our shelves and not one of them was interested in being served by me.

Edward was accompanied on one wild goose chase after another and each time he looked increasingly tense. Clearly, the sudden influx of new customers had nothing to do with our discount structure and everything to do with the bronze-haired vampire that had crossed my threshold almost six weeks previously.

It was the first time outside of a grocery store that I had witnessed his extreme discomfort at people wanting him for what he was. That was exactly why he preferred not to be out in society.

The few students that did approach me were hoping to order themselves a cup of coffee. Each time I pointed them across the street to the coffee shop, it reaffirmed my love for the traditional, old-fashioned bookstore I was standing in and reinforced my resolve to always keep it that way while I was in charge.

Mike poked his head around the door at midday and, at the clang of the bell, all heads turned his way. His eyes widened and he swiftly retreated back to his own store. I was tempted to grab my lunch and follow him, but one look at Edward's stern face made me stay put.

By mid-afternoon, I was beginning to lose my patience. It didn't help matters that I still hadn't had a moment's peace to eat my grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup, nor that, for all the increase in footfall, we had sold very little in the way of stock.

With one last customer remaining, I stood by the cash desk, tapping my foot. The sound of a book landing on the floor caught my attention and I looked up to see Edward skipping out from between the bookcases, closely followed by a long-haired boy in a grey wool peacoat.

In order to avoid crashing into my desk, Edward took one step to his left and the boy's hand landed firmly on its target: Edward's rear.

That was it! No one was allowed to touch Edward but me!

I strode over to the front door and opened it up to the elements. A damp, icy wind blew in, bringing a few dried leaves with it. The bell clanged ominously overhead.

"Young man!" I shouted.

The student jumped back and turned to face me, his eyes narrowing.

"The man you are so intent on molesting is my sales assistant, not some kind of exhibit in a petting zoo. Are you intending to buy something?" He shook his head. "Then I am going to have to ask you to leave."

He muttered something under his breath, no doubt a slur against my character, adjusted his backpack on his shoulder and loped out of the door.

I shut the door and fetched my keys to lock up while Edward stared blankly out of the window at the leaves swirling around on the sidewalk. I flipped the sign to say Closed, moved to his side and wrapped an arm around his waist.

"Thank you," he said.

"They were like a swarm of relentless wasps at an outdoor pizza party, weren't they?"

He snorted. "Very handsy wasps."

"I'm sorry," I said, slowly sliding my hand down from his waist to cup his backside. I gave it a gentle squeeze. Mine!

"Miss Swan, may I ask what your hand is doing on my bottom?"

"I'm testing your reflexes, but it would appear they only function when there are male students in the vicinity."

"I cannot read your mind as well you are aware." I squeezed again. "I ought to report you to Mrs C for sexual harassment."

With one last squeeze, I let my hand drop and smiled up at him. "She'd be on my side."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that. She really likes me."

I like you too, I thought, staring into his eyes as they slowly changed from gold to black. "Forgive me," I whispered. "That was highly inappropriate behaviour for the workplace."

He sucked in a breath and took a step back. A trickle of saliva escaped the corner of his mouth and he poked his tongue out to swipe it away. Then he swallowed and my hand instinctively found its way to my throat.

"Do you mind if I go out and catch myself a bite to eat?" he whispered.

I didn't want him to go anywhere. I didn't want his teeth sinking into anything but my left thigh, but I very much doubted that would happen. He'd endured enough of other people's desires for one day.

I unlocked the door to let him out and then locked it back up again. I'd set the wild animal free but what did that make me? A domestic pet?

My lunch was gone in minutes. The cold grilled cheese had been a little on the chewy side, but I'd been too ravenous to care. I made myself a coffee and fetched my scissors to open up the consignment of books from St Louis.

The first two boxes contained a collection of vegetarian cookery books that spanned nearly three decades. The next two held an array of knitting and crochet books going back to before I was born when styles were boxy and baggy.

In the fifth box, I discovered the ancient civilisations of Rome, Greece, Egypt and South America. The last was filled with eerily illustrated hardbacks in dust jackets – English gothic novels and ghost stories from the Victorian era.

So captivated was I that I didn't even notice the clock ticking.

Two hours had passed when Edward rapped on the glass pane of the front door. Looking up at the time, I clasped a hand over my mouth and jumped up to let him in.

"I completely forgot to reopen the store," I said, blushing.

He laughed at me. "It's not long until we close now anyway. Would you like me to help you box these back up?"

"Thanks."

We were in my truck driving home when Edward asked me about my second little lapse in professionalism of the day.

"What was it about that consignment of books that had you so enthralled?"

"You saw them," I said, smiling. "Can't you guess?"

"The vegetarian cookery?"

I laughed. If he'd seen me lick my plate clean the previous evening he'd know how ridiculous that was. "Only from the standpoint of changes in cooking style and available ingredients."

"Ah, so it was the craft books."

"Same, sort of." I could sew on buttons and manage minor repairs, but that was only out of necessity. I was rarely interested in shopping for clothes, let alone making them.

"The ancient civilisations?"

"You do realise you're just listing what was there, don't you?" I said, glancing sideways at him.

He was staring right at me, maintaining a poker face, although his lips may have twitched. It was hard to tell in the dim light of the cab.

"I could get lost in books like that, actually," I said, "but no."

"Well, well, Bella." He sniggered. "Gothic novels and ghost stories. I'd never have suspected you'd be drawn to that kind of thing from looking at your book collection at home."

"I was admiring the books themselves, the quality of the bindings, the thickness of the paper and the artistry of the illustrations."

"Who wouldn't? But I was stood outside for quite a while before I knocked on the door and my eyesight is excellent even at a distance."

I shifted in my seat and kept my eyes on the road.

"You're nothing like him," I said.

"No, I'm not. He's a work of fiction whereas I'm…"

"Real," I whispered.

I pulled into my driveway and parked the truck. There was a dampness to the cool evening air that suggested rain was on its way. I climbed the steps and unlocked my apartment door, dumping my things by the closet and heading for the kitchen.

Having had such a late lunch, I wasn't feeling particularly hungry. I eyed the remains of the red wine in the bottle on the countertop and was about to pour it into a glass when I thought better of it.

"Aren't you eating?" Edward asked, coming up behind me.

"Later, maybe. You?" Surely, he wouldn't need to go out again so soon.

"Later. Maybe."

I turned around. "Not hungry either, huh?"

He shook his head and went to sit on the sofa, picking up a book I was certain he'd read already and opening it somewhere in the middle. Something about his posture and the set of his jaw was almost dismissive.

Was he shutting me out or locking himself in? Either way, I'd had enough of him blowing hot and cold.

"I think I'll have an early shower," I mumbled to myself and walked over to the closet to fetch some clean nightwear. I picked out a set I wouldn't normally wear on a cold October's night and headed into the bathroom.

I looked in the mirror above the sink. I wasn't the fairest them of all, but I did have a clear complexion, bright eyes, good teeth and very nice hair. Edward had shown me on countless occasions that he found me attractive, but still he kept pulling away where most red-blooded men would have jumped at the opportunity.

Unfortunately, "most" in my case meant Mike and Jacob.

Turning on the shower, I quickly stripped off my clothes and used a washcloth to clean my face, neck and underarms. I brushed my teeth, combed my hair and put on my navy blue shorts and tank top. Then I switched off the shower and immediately opened the bathroom door.

It's entirely possible that Edward was as startled as I was when we came face to face in the space between the bathroom, the closet and the front door.

I put my hands on my hips. "Were you about to sneak out?"

"No," he said, pointing to the closet. "I was just fetching something."

I glanced down at his empty hands. "Have you been avoiding me?"

"What? No!" he said. I raised my eyebrows and stared up at him, but he refused to look at me. "Maybe a little bit."

"Is it because of my period because that's been over for a couple of days now?"

"No."

I took a step toward him and he stepped back.

"Is it because you've never… because that doesn't bother–"

"No!"

I reached my left hand down and brushed my fingertips over my left thigh. His eyes darted to the spot where his bite mark lay and he licked his lips.

Even when I raised the same hand to rest it on the exposed skin of my chest, he seemed unable to take his eyes off his mark. Such was its apparent allure, when I moved forward and he back again, he failed to notice that I was walking him into a wall until it was too late.

For once, I felt I had the upper hand. I rubbed the front of my body against his, paying particular attention to the area of growth in his pants.

He groaned. "Do you have any idea what you are doing to me?"

"No," I replied as innocently as I could manage.

"You are testing every last ounce of my control, Bella. I know what you want and it isn't that I want to deny either of us… that, I just don't believe we'd survive it unscathed."

I stopped still and looked up at him. "What possible harm could it do to you?"

He put his hands on my hips but made no move to put any space between us. "If I were to hurt you, if I were to kill you, Bella, I would lose my mind."

"We've done alright so far, haven't we? We can take it a step at a time."

"Did you not see what I did to that tree when you put your hands on me?"

"Yes, but you didn't hurt me."

He tilted his head back and looked up at the ceiling. "If I hadn't hunted immediately afterward, I would have bitten you again."

"I wouldn't have minded." I licked his neck with the tip of my tongue and his hips jerked forward. "I like it when you bite me."

He groaned again. "You only have so much blood to lose, Bella, and even if I only take a little of it at a time, you still need time to recover. It takes weeks to fully replenish your red blood cells."

"You're making it more complicated than it has to be."

"And you are ignoring what I am yet again," he said, changing his tone. "Biting you, sucking your blood like I have been, it's an erotic game – one we cannot play indefinitely. We should not have played it as many times as we have."

My throat tightened. "A game?" I tried to pull away but his arms wrapped around my back, holding me in place.

"It goes against my very nature to stop and your body isn't capable of quenching my thirst indefinitely."

I squirmed. "That's all I am to you? A drink? A shot glass full of warm blood?"

"That is so far from what I just said. I don't want to kill you, Bella."

"Then turn me."

His arms immediately dropped to his sides and I had to take two steps back to keep my balance. His eyes were as dark as I had ever seen them.

"I am not about to take your life away just so we can have sex," he said.

"You didn't lose your life."

"You don't know what you're asking for."

"Then perhaps you should explain it to me, Edward."

"Not tonight."

"You're going out again, aren't you?"

"Yes."

My heart sank. "What do you do when you go out?" I whispered.

"You know what I do. I hunt."

"And?"

He looked at me, his eyes getting lighter in colour as his expression softened. "And then I come back."

"And?"

He hung his head. "I sit on the steps outside your front door."

"What? Have you been waiting for me to go to sleep?" That thought should have made me angry but instead it brought me close to tears. I turned my back on him. "If it's that horrible sharing a bed with me, perhaps you should go and not come back."

"You don't mean that."

He was right. I didn't. "Why are we hurting each other, Edward?" I whispered.

"I'm sorry."

"So am I." I wiped a hand over my eyes, surprised to see so much moisture on my fingers.

"Come on," he said, scooping me up in his arms. "Let's get you into bed. I'll go hunting once you're asleep."

"Will you come straight back?" I said into his chest.

"Yes."

"Will you hold me through the night?"

"Will that be enough?"

"For now."


	25. Daydream

**25\. Daydream**

No one can be held responsible for what they say or do in their sleep. Neither can they help what they overhear.

"Oh, Bella! Please. I've only just come… and now I'm going to have to…"

In my dream, I was kicking away the covers. I was too hot and I was desperate to feel something cold and hard against my overheated skin.

His hands – my hands – were everywhere. My tank top had been pulled down beneath one breast so his fingers – my fingers – could pinch and pull at my nipple. My panties had been tugged down on one side, so his fingers – my fingers – could finally bring me some relief from over a week of unfulfilled desire.

Cool air blew across the bite mark on my left leg, then a lick, a nip and another lick. Did I really imagine the cold nose running up my thigh? Did I really imagine the icy tongue licking at the fingers that caressed me?

Did I really dream the words that were then whispered so softly in my ear?

"I cannot believe I'm even considering this with you dreaming like this beside me. If only you understood how patient I've been with you, Bella, but I can't leave you again tonight and I cannot wait."

The sound of a zipper coming down.

"So long as I'm going to hell…"

The sound of skin against skin.

"Bella…"

The sounds of a man coming undone.

Those were the sounds that brought me to my dream climax, that brought me to mouth his name in my sleep.

Edward must have returned not long after that because when I stirred I was engulfed in his arms just as he had promised. I fell back into a deep and satisfied slumber.

…

"Good morning," Edward said, placing a cup of coffee on the side table.

He was smiling so much his amber eyes sparkled. I smiled back until I remembered my dream and then I blushed.

"Would you have preferred something ice cold?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. His words had a teasing tone to them.

I opened my mouth and closed it again before I settled on a reply. "Coffee is fine, thank you, Edward."

"Breakfast will be ready in fifteen minutes. There's time to freshen up if you'd like to."

Edward returned to the kitchen and I sat up, instantly aware of how damp my panties were. I reached for my coffee cup, raised it to my mouth and balked.

There was a very distinctive smell coming from my fingers. I looked down at the neckline of my tank top. It had been stretched out of shape and was barely keeping me decent.

My entire body flushed with heat. Was my inadvertent display the reason for that gleam in Edward's eyes?

Checking he had his back to me, I slunk out of bed and tiptoed toward the closet to fetch some fresh clothes. Then, as I made a dash for the bathroom, I was pulled up short by an unfamiliar sound coming from the kitchen.

Edward was whistling!

The tune was vaguely familiar and took me back to my childhood when my mom would hold me on her lap to watch animated movies that reconstructed dark and sinister fairy tales, glossing over real-life issues to provide the viewer with a happy ending.

But happy endings didn't last beyond the end of the movie. My mother broke my father's heart and then went on to get her own heart broken by a string of charming princes when each dream come true turned out to be a veritable nightmare.

I showered and dressed, arriving at the table just as Edward was setting down my plate. Breakfast consisted of baked eggs with spinach and cheese, a glass of orange juice and a fresh cup of coffee. I wiped an errant tear from my eye, plastered a smile on my face and thanked him.

Three quarters of an hour later, I was still sitting at the kitchen table, this time with Edward sitting opposite me while I stared at the blank screen on my laptop.

Devoid of inspiration yet again, and with seemingly little point in going back to a half-baked idea, only one thing came to mind when I thought about moving forward.

I got up and walked over to the closet to pull my box of stationery down off its shelf. From underneath notebooks of varying sizes, packets of pens, pencils, erasers and sticky tape, I retrieved a large, green fabric covered book with a black spine.

Back at the table, I opened the book to the first page and pressed it down. Edward's fountain pen rolled toward me.

I smiled and picked it up. "What will you do while I'm borrowing this?"

"Watch you," he said.

"You'll be bored silly."

"I doubt it."

Several pages in, I raised my eyes to find Edward staring at me. It was the kind of hard stare that a bear might give a person while chomping down a slice of marmalade on toast.

I smirked. "Are you trying to read my mind?"

"No," he said, scrubbing a hand over his face, "I'm just thinking."

"About?"

"Nothing in particular."

"What's wrong with me? What is it that keeps you out of my head?"

"Sheer bloody-mindedness?"

I frowned. "That's an odd thing to say."

He laughed. "It's a family expression, commonly directed at me by my father. There is nothing wrong with you, Bella. In fact, I'd even go as far as to say your mind displays a certain brilliance in its ability to keep me out, but…"

"But?"

"I am frustrated."

"By me?" He nodded. "If you're that keen to know what I'm thinking, you could just ask."

"Some thoughts are best left unsolicited. Some have more meaning if they are volunteered."

I pushed back my chair, got up and poured the remains of the coffee pot into a cup. I leaned against the counter near to where Edward was sitting and held the cup to my lips with both hands.

"Perhaps we should play a game," I said, taking a sip of coffee and spitting it straight back out into the cup. It has been stewing on the hot plate far too long.

Edward raised both eyebrows. "What kind of a game?"

"A mind reading game, one where I actively try to let you read my mind."

"What makes you think you can do that?"

"Sheer bloody-mindedness." I winked at him and poured the contents of my cup down the sink. Taking one step toward him, I focussed my thoughts.

Edward stared up at me, his eyes wide and unblinking. I took another step, raised my hands and placed them gently on either side of his face. His lips parted. I wove my fingers into his hair and leaned in until our noses touched.

"Bella," he whispered. "We shouldn't."

"Shouldn't what, Edward?"

"Kiss."

"Is that really what I'm thinking?"

"It certainly looks that way."

"Looks can be deceiving," I said, straightening up and dropping my hands back down to my sides. "And it's my mind you're supposed to be reading, not my body language."

Edward shifted in his seat. "Perhaps we should start small and play that little game of questions you like so much, only I'll try to pick the answers out of your head."

"Okay." I leaned back against the counter again. "Fire away."

"Favourite colour?" He fixed his eyes on mine.

I projected my answer as best I could, willing him to read my mind, but he furrowed his brow and shook his head.

"Favourite book?"

My eyes were instinctively drawn to my bookcase, but there were so many possibilities, he could have been guessing for hours – if he'd ever started.

"Favourite food?" His lips turned up at the corners as he said, "Chocolate?"

"Nope."

"What then?"

"Grilled cheese à la Edward."

"Silly me!" He grinned. "Favourite place?"

I closed my eyes and imagined him getting up from his chair, unable to resist the pull between us. I imagined him wrapping his arms around me so I could rest my head against his chest and his lips tickling my ear as he whispered the words: it's mine too.

"Deepest fear?" he said, cutting through my reverie.

You leaving me and never coming back, I thought. Never feeling your teeth on me again. Never knowing what it is to make lo–

"I'm sorry, Bella. I've never known anyone quite like you. It's maddening but at the same time… it's so peaceful."

My stomach rumbled rather loudly and he laughed. "Your mind might be silent to me but your stomach is not."

By rights, it was a little too soon for lunch, but I reheated a can of tomato soup, cut some toast into fingers and then I sat dipping, chewing and slurping, giving Edward the chance to use his own pen for a while.

But as soon as I reopened my notebook, the pen came rolling back across the table.

Edward stretched out his long legs and leaned back on his chair with his hands behind his head. I glanced up occasionally to see if he'd changed position, but he hadn't. Eventually, though, he shut his eyes.

Later that evening, I showered and crawled into bed, wearing my red plaid pyjamas. Edward left, having promised to return within the hour, and I drifted off to sleep.

…

It was the best kind of fantasy – the sort you let play out in your head while executing a mundane task that doesn't require your full attention, or when you are leaning back on a kitchen chair with your hands behind your head, pretending to be asleep.

"I might not be able to read your mind," he murmured, "but it would appear you can see right into mine."

He hovered over me, unbuttoning my pyjama top.

"Bella, please would you stop undressing yourself."

Huh? If he wasn't going to cooperate, then neither was I. It was my fantasy, after all. I wriggled my pyjama bottoms down and kicked them off.

"Oh hell! Twice in as many nights! Bella Swan, you will surely be the death of me."

His hand was between my legs. It wasn't exactly the part of him I wanted there, but I wasn't about to restart the scene from scratch. I'd work with whatever I was given, no matter how contrary the partner in crime.

"What aren't you telling me when you're awake? What is it that you want from me?"

You. Your fingers. Your teeth. Your tongue. Your body. I'm too hot, Edward. I need you to cool me down.

"Is this all you want me for? I can't do this again. It's not right. Please wake up or I'll have to leave."

Don't leave me!

"I won't go far."

It was the slam of the front door that jolted me out of my dream and made me sit up. I switched on the lamp on the side table and gasped.

Everything was in disarray. The bedcovers were lying in a heap on the floor along with my pyjama pants. My top was unbuttoned and falling off my shoulders, and my panties were halfway down my thighs.

"Edward?" I pulled up my panties and refastened the buttons on my top.

"I'm just outside. Give me a moment."

I needed a moment too. Snatching up my pants, I ran to the bathroom. I used the toilet, washed my face and then poked my head out of the door.

Edward was sitting on the remade bed with his head in his hands.

"Should I be saying sorry?" I asked, wincing.

"No, of course not," he said. "Perhaps if I held you, kept you cool, you wouldn't get so… overheated."

As I walked back into the room, he stripped off his T-shirt and got under the covers. I turned off the lamp and climbed in, snuggling against his chest so his ice cold skin could calm my burning cheeks.

…

Chores were the name of the Monday game and knowing it was our last, I made a conscious effort to note every detail, no matter how humdrum.

When the laundry, the cleaning, the grocery shopping and the cooking were done, I got out the green fabric covered notebook and read back over what I had written so far.

I wished I could borrow Edward's fountain pen again. I looked over at him stretched out on the sofa with his ankles resting on one of the arms and his head on the other. In his right hand, he was holding a book, which he had to have borrowed from the store, but he wasn't reading it because his right arm was draped across his chest as it rose and fell.

It was as if he'd fallen asleep.

My chest tightened at the thought of him leaving, of our time fast running out. I got up to fetch myself a glass of water from the refrigerator and then returned to the table. There in the fold of my open notebook was Edward's fountain pen and yet Edward had not moved an inch.

I stopped writing at around seven o'clock to eat a portion of the lasagne I'd made earlier and then picked up the pen again.

By the time I got to bed, I was fully expecting Edward to go out, but he lay down under the covers beside me with his chest bare and pulled me into his arms.

"How does it work?" I whispered into the darkness.

"How does what work?"

"The change from human to vampire? You said I didn't understand, so…"

He let out a long slow breath. "The vampire must have considerable restraint. It isn't easy for us to stop once we've tasted blood."

"But that's it, right? Venom injected. Job done."

"Pretty much, give or take three days of excruciating pain while the venom transforms the human's body."

"Why would the vampire be in pain?"

"Not the vampire, Bella, the human."

"Oh."

"The pain is indescribable. I will never be able to erase the memory of my transformation. No vampire could. I wished I were dead for three whole days and then, when I awoke and learned what I had become, I wished for death all over again."

"Do you still?"

"Wish I were dead? No, not anymore. Now I wish for… other things."

"What do you wish for, Edward?"

"Surely you know that wishes don't come true if you say them out loud?"

And there, in a nutshell, was why I couldn't ask him to stay.

"Edward?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you have considerable restraint?"

His entire body stiffened. "Er, most of the time."

"You've never changed anyone, though, have you?"

"No."

I inhaled his scent and closed my eyes, feeling drowsy already. "Do you think you could?"

"With the right motivation, maybe. At least, that's what Carlisle believes."

"What motivated him to change you?" I mumbled.

If he answered me, it didn't register, for in his cold embrace, I had finally succumbed to sleep.


	26. Pumpkin

**26\. Pumpkin**

The rain had been coming down in sheets since right after we had opened the bookstore and it didn't look like it was going to ease up.

Inside, it was deathly quiet in every way, except for the ticking of the clock on the wall and my fingers tapping on the computer keys as I began the long job of processing the boxes of books sent from St Louis.

Edward had handled all the online orders that had come in over the weekend and bagged them up ready for a post office run. Since then, he had sat on the stool behind the cash desk, reading a book about dreams and their meanings.

Needing a break from my screen, I used the restroom, put the kettle on and made myself another coffee. Then I stretched my legs by doing circuits around the store.

"What's it like to be a vampire?" I asked as I wandered, assuming Edward would hear me.

"That's like asking how long is a piece of string. Could you be more specific?"

"Just after… you know."

"It's different for each of us, especially those with a special ability like mine. Everything overwhelms you – sight, sound, sensation – it's all heightened exponentially. Some take to it instantly, like my brother Emmett, and some don't, but none of us can escape the one imperative – the bloodlust."

I stopped in front of a bookcase and my eyes alighted on the book of Quileute legends. I put my coffee down on the floor and pulled the book off the shelf, opening it by chance to a gruesome picture labelled 'Cold One' that I had somehow missed before.

"It consumes your every thought," Edward said. "Nothing else matters and even when you think you've had your fill, you want more. You remember every kill, every desiccated body, every life you've taken and there is no escape from it because you cannot die and you cannot sleep."

"And after? When the bloodlust passes?"

A gust of cool air blew across the back of my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

"It doesn't pass, Bella," Edward murmured into my ear.

He pressed his body against mine, bringing his arms around me so his hands were resting on a bookshelf. His cheek brushed mine as he leaned over my shoulder to look at the book in my hands.

"With practice, it can be controlled," he said, "but some have no desire to quell the monster within. Alice and Jasper each found their own conscience and chose a more civilised path. Myself, Esme, Rosalie and Emmett – we had Carlisle to guide us, to help us retain some semblance of humanity."

As he drew back, he ran his nose over my jaw and inhaled. Then he stepped away, leaving me quivering on the spot. Before I could blink, the book was removed from my hands and returned to the shelf.

"Finish your coffee, Bella. It's getting cold."

Half dazed, I picked up my mug and returned to my desk. Edward was perched on the stool by the cash desk with the book about dreams in his hand and his brow furrowed in concentration.

Mike didn't come for lunch but I wasn't surprised. Even his most expensive waterproof would not have kept him dry. The rain did lessen throughout the afternoon, but we still didn't get anyone coming in. Edward did the post office run in my truck and returned for me as I was closing up the store.

I ran on autopilot all evening, wondering if I should stand out in the rain so I could let my unshed tears fall unnoticed. Edward patiently moved around me, sat alongside me and then held me through the night.

…

On Wednesday morning, he made my last breakfast, packed my last lunch and drove us to the store without a word, not that I was feeling particularly talkative myself.

At ten o'clock, he placed a mug of coffee on my desk and perched on the arm of the battered leather chair.

"Bella?"

"Hmm?" I said, keeping my eyes on the computer.

"Are you looking forward to the party tonight?"

No. I hate parties. And partings. "Of course."

"Do you have a supernatural date lined up?"

I couldn't help it. Miserable as I was feeling, I laughed. "I think so."

"You're not sure?" I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Everyone else thinks my date is a vampire but I have yet to be convinced."

I turned my head to wink at him but he had gone.

"Edward?"

"Over here."

He stood at the end of the History section, his mouth curved up on one side, beckoning me with one hand. I got up and walked slowly toward him, not taking my eyes off him for a moment, but he somehow managed to disappear again.

He had me chase him all over the store in that manner until I was flushed and giggly. When the first customer came in, I returned to my desk with a smile on my face and worked at processing the new stock until just before midday.

Edward left to hunt, assuming I would have company, but Mike never showed up and my smile soon wore off when I remembered that the grilled cheese sandwich I was eating would be my last made by Edward.

An elderly gentleman with a beard came in as I was making my afternoon coffee. He found several volumes to purchase and after I'd packed them up and taken his money, he asked if I would help carry the books out to his car.

When I walked back into the store, the bell clanging above me, the first thing I noticed was the grinning pumpkin lantern with pointy fangs sitting on my desk, complete with flickering candle.

Edward was perched on the arm of the battered leather chair, sporting a similar grin and amber eyes.

"My turn to chase you," he said and what followed was a playful game that ended with me pinned against the very bookcase that had tried to kill me weeks before.

Edward lowered his face to my neck and snapped his teeth together. "Have I convinced you yet?"

I giggled. "No."

The bell clanged and we broke apart, returning to our duties – me with my glowing, orange companion by my side.

We took the lantern home with us and I ate the soup Edward had made from its flesh. The party hour was fast approaching and while that filled me with a certain trepidation, it was the witching hour that had me truly terrified.

…

Clutching my invitation in one hand, I pulled my cloak around me with the other, grateful that said invitation had not specified a dress code. A skimpy costume was the last thing I would want to be wearing underground on a chilly night in Port Angeles, Halloween party or otherwise.

As we approached the meeting spot, Edward took hold of my hand and my cloak fell open again. I scanned the assembled guests but I couldn't see Angela among them, nor any of her usual crowd. In fact, I did not recognise a single soul.

I held the invitation up to my face, squinting at the print in the dim light of the moon to double check we were in the right place at the right time, only to have the thick piece of embossed card whisked out of my hand.

"Ah, at last. Miss Swan and guest." The middle-aged tour guide was dressed in a smart black dinner suit with a bow tie and a bowler hat. His smile faltered momentarily when he came face to face with Edward, but he quickly regained his composure and turned back to the rest of the group.

"Now we are all here," he said, tucking my invitation under the clip on his board, "let us descend into the bowels of Port Angeles. Stay close now. I wouldn't want to lose anyone along the way."

He grasped my wrist firmly and pulled me toward a set of steps. In turn, I tightened my grip on Edward's hand and dragged him after me.

Over the next couple of hours, we followed our guide along underground passages and forgotten sidewalks. We wound our way in and out of abandoned stores, past dilapidated storefronts and painted murals depicting lost views of the old city.

On occasion, figures dressed in period clothing would emerge from the shadows to tell their stories and, invariably, Edward would be the only person aside from the tour guide not to jump or squeal in surprise.

As the tour was nearing its end, one last ghostly character dressed in a long white lace dress scared me into Edward's arms. He bent his head down and whispered in my ear, "I'm the scariest creature down here and yet you jump right into my arms at the slightest provocation."

"There is nothing scary about you," I said, rubbing my face against his chest. In my head, however, I couldn't help but acknowledge that of which I was genuinely fearful. At midnight he would be leaving me.

He began to make the oddest sound. It started as a rumble in his chest and then rose in volume as he let it out right by my ear. If he'd been anything other than what he was, I'd have said he had growled.

The effect was instantaneous. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end, my heart rate picked up and my fingers clenched into fists filled with the fabric of Edward's coat. It was entirely possible that I trembled, although whether that was out of fear or excitement, I could not say.

"If I'd wanted to," he whispered, "I could have snapped the necks of this entire tour party before you'd uttered your first scream."

I looked up at him and, despite his furrowed brow and black eyes, I couldn't help but smile.

He shook his head and sighed. "You'll never believe me until you've experienced it first hand, will you?"

"Probably not."

He leaned down, pressed his lips to the side of my neck and murmured, "You do realise that there's only one way for that to happen, don't you?"

I tilted my head back and whispered, "Bite me."

"With pleasure," he said, releasing me from his arms and striding away, "but not here."

"What?!" I swayed on the spot and then almost tripped over my own feet as I ran after him.

We rejoined the group on the sidewalk at the top of the steps, thanked our guide and began the walk back to my apartment. But barely had we turned the corner than I found myself hoisted off the ground and thrown onto Edward's back.

The long skirt of my emerald green wrap dress split open as I wound my bare legs around Edward's waist.

"Hold on tight," he said, gripping my thighs, and then he set off through the empty city streets, eventually picking up speed under the cover of the trees.

He ran for less than ten minutes before he set me on my feet again in front of a small wooden building.

"Where are we?" I asked.

"It's an old schoolhouse."

I sniggered. "Are you going to teach me a thing or two?"

He stepped up to the entrance, fiddled with the lock and opened the door. I followed him inside and sniffed the air. The one room building appeared to be dry and well cared for, not that I could see that clearly in the darkness.

Edward walked over to the far wall, unbuttoned his coat and laid it on the floor.

"Bella?" I stopped my turnabout and faced him. "I will change you if that's what you want, but I do have one condition."

"Are you offering to exchange your venom for sex?" I asked hopefully.

"No, although once you are a vampire, I wouldn't be averse to it."

"But you're averse to it now."

"You know my reasons for holding back."

The thought was out the moment it entered my mind. "I'm not marrying you."

He smirked. "Did I ask you to marry me? Do I really seem like the kind of man that would want an arranged marriage?"

"Arranged?"

"That's how it starts – with the bartering."

"So bartering is acceptable but not when it comes to marriage."

"Or sex."

I sighed. "What's your condition?"

"There is something you have to tell me."

"And it can't it wait until afterward?"

"No, and you had better hurry. Our contract runs out at midnight."

"One hundred and fifty dollars."

"What?" His eyebrows shot up toward his hairline.

"Dammit! That isn't what you meant, is it?" I schooled my face.

"You only paid one hundred and fifty dollars? For me? For six weeks?"

"I was supposed to house you and feed you for six weeks. Besides, we both know your sister wasn't after my money."

"And that didn't make you suspicious?"

"I was being asked to house a man for six weeks at my own expense."

"A vampire."

"Yes, but I didn't believe that then, did I?"

"And you do now?"

"I…" I raised my chin. "I'll tell you when you've changed me."

"Did you really pay so very little?"

"It's bugging you, isn't it?"

"Maybe."

"I'm playing with you, Edward. Really I am." I smiled. "Now, what is it you want me to tell you?"

"Ah. You'll have to work that one out for yourself."

"No hints?"

He shook his head.

"But there's less than an hour till midnight."

His face showed no emotion.

"Rumplestiltskin?" He shook his head again and I shrugged. "It was worth a try."

"What will you do when the contract is over?"

I looked down at my feet. "I don't know. You?"

"If I'm not running after a newborn vampire, I'll be stalking the woman I love."

My chest tightened. "Remember when I told you my views on love?"

"Like you said the words yesterday."

"I'm not afraid of becoming my mother, Edward," I whispered, "I'm afraid of becoming my dad."

"Then don't."

I stared at him for the longest time and in those minutes of silence, I became aware of a clock somewhere in the room, chiming the third quarter of the hour.

My mind drifted back to my conversation with Angela – her regret at having the potential for lifelong happiness right in front of her and letting it go without a fight. I recalled Mrs C telling me not to be afraid to change my life. And then I thought of my dad, who had waited seven long years for me to be strong enough to live my life without him. He had waited until I had found…

"Edward, I…"

His eyes widened as if he were pleading for something and then his lips moved silently.

"What did you say?"

"Say it, Bella. Please."

"Please don't stalk her."

"Who?"

"Either of them. The vampire. That woman."

He pursed his lips. "Why not?"

"Because I want you to stay with me. I want you to love me."

"Why, Bella?"

"Because, Edward, I really, really love you."

He crossed the room in two strides and pulled me into his arms, bending me backward so my neck was exposed.

"You have only seconds to live, seconds to change your mind and then I'm claiming what is mine."

"What?!"

The clock whirred and chimed once, twice, thrice… and on the eleventh chime, Edward pressed his lips to my neck, first with a kiss and then with a nip, and said, "Ready?"


	27. Virtue

**27\. Virtue**

Edward hadn't bitten my neck on the stroke of midnight. He hadn't bitten my neck at all. Instead, he had laid me down on his coat, parted the skirt of my wrap dress and sunk his teeth into my left thigh.

He'd sucked my blood and then sent me spinning toward ecstasy when he'd licked the wound. But something had been different. The bite had begun to burn.

I screamed. I thrashed. I cursed. And all the while I heard him saying the most out of place things.

"Oh hell. Did you have to pick this night to go without underwear?"

Had he not noticed when he bit me? I could have sworn I'd felt his nose right there.

"No bra either? What on earth were you planning?"

Wasn't it obvious?

"I can't help myself, Bella. I've been so patient, so good." I felt his teeth clamp down above my left breast. "Mine!"

And then there were flames so fierce, so hot, I thought I would lose my mind.

"Why aren't you moving?"

"Why are you so silent?"

"This isn't normal."

"What did I do wrong?"

Inch by inch, I retreated into my head, desperate to find the off switch to my pain receptors. If I had taken biology instead of English, I might have had some idea of where to look.

I cried out for Edward. I called for Angela. I thought about shouting for Mike, but treating my pain was way beyond even his first aid capabilities.

Would no one come to help me?

And then I heard my dad's voice in the distance. My dad was coming for me. Perhaps that wasn't such a good sign after all.

"Dad, it hurts," I said.

"I know, Bells. It has to hurt before it gets better."

"Really, Dad?"

"You know I'm not good with this kind of thing."

"You don't say!"

"There's more than one way to break a heart," he said, "and more than one way to mend it."

"Your heart was so broken, it killed you."

"Eating in the diner for fifteen years killed me, Bells. My emotional heart mended just fine."

"How come?"

"You came home."

"Would you stay with me?"

"I'll hold your hand till it's time to go fishing. How's that?"

"I guess it's better than a kick in the teeth."

…

The clock struck one and I sat up with a start, a cold sweat breaking out across my face, neck and chest.

The schoolhouse was dimly lit by a dappled moonlight that brightened and softened with the shifting of the clouds.

Edward was sitting on the opposite side of the room with his head in his hands and his elbows resting on his knees. I was still very much dressed and still very much a warm-blooded human being.

"You didn't do it," I said. "I'm not…"

"No." He shook his head but didn't look up.

I frowned. "Are you not what you say you are?"

Scrubbing his hands over his face, he raised his head. "I am and then again not."

"What does that mean?"

"I am a vampire, Bella. I've never lied to you about that."

"But you have lied?"

"By omission, yes."

"What haven't you told me, Edward?"

"You, Bella, are my mate."

"Your what?"

"I think you have a pretty good idea of what that means."

"Before we… you said you were claiming what was yours."

"Yes."

"Me?"

"Yes. The one person meant for me. My soulmate, if you prefer. Vampires are like swans; we mate for life."

I burst out laughing. "That's so cheesy."

"Isn't it?" He grinned.

"And a complete myth."

"Nevertheless," he said, winking, "it is why you've found me so irresistible."

I poked my tongue out at him and his smile faded. "And why I couldn't leave you, Bella, even for your own good.

"It took me a while to understand what you were to me, but each time I bit you, each time I tasted your blood, the connection grew stronger. You felt it too, didn't you? You needed me to…"

"To what?"

"Consummate our relationship."

"And you didn't believe you could ever do that without changing me first."

"No." He shook his head. "It hasn't been easy holding back. My body reacts to you in a way it has never done before."

I looked down at his crotch and then back up at his face. "You are joking, right?"

"I am deadly serious, Bella. You have an effect on me like no other."

I was torn between hysterical laughter and a yearning to cross the room and test this piece of information. "How long have you known?"

"Subconsciously, I believe I've known since the day you invited me over the threshold into your apartment."

"And consciously?"

"It was too gradual a process to pinpoint any given moment."

"I don't understand. Why didn't you offer to change me sooner?"

"You're forgetting that I had time to get to know you. And what did I learn? That you didn't believe in the supernatural and you didn't believe in love."

"Ah," I said, smiling. "I'm still reserving judgement."

He narrowed his eyes at me for a moment. "Every step of the way, you have found excuses and explanations for what you've deemed to be my little idiosyncrasies, haven't you? You have refused to believe what was right in front of you."

"Less so after you met my dad," I whispered.

He nodded. "But still, in your mind, I was merely fulfilling a contractual obligation. It was all an act."

"You could have told me how you felt."

"What, like Mike did? Anything I might have said or done to indicate my true feelings for you would have been viewed with the utmost of suspicion at best, Bella."

I couldn't argue with that. "So what was tonight about?"

"I thought I could do it. I thought I could change you and tell you afterward, but when you said those words, when you said that you love me, I found I couldn't take that final step, not without telling you everything first."

"So you're not in love with me?"

He dropped his head into his hands and tugged at his hair. "That is precisely my point. I declared my feelings for you barely an hour ago. I made love to you. I waited until after the last stroke of midnight and yet you doubt me. You're already looking for a loophole, aren't you?"

I tucked my hair behind my ear and looked at the floor. "Do you remember when I told Mike you were mine and I was keeping you?"

"Yes. It was the first time I dared to hope."

I blinked a few times. "I think that's when I knew but I didn't know how to tell you what I wanted. I didn't know how to tell myself. And we had that stupid contract. I'd paid for you to be with me. I couldn't see why else you'd want to stay."

"Oh, Bella! Come here."

I shook my head and drew patterns on the floorboards with my index finger. "Mate. That's like a predestined thing, isn't it? You had no choice."

"No more than any man has when it dawns on him that his heart is no longer his own because it already belongs to another – when he discovers he has found the woman he wants to spend the rest of his days with, the woman he wants to make love to for eternity."

"There is no rhyme or reason to it," I whispered, "it just is."

"Look at me, Bella."

I raised my head.

"I am in love with you. I love you. There is no contract. There is no trickery. I want you to want me for who I am. No strings, no financial arrangements, no bargains, no doubts."

"What kind of life would we lead together?"

"The one we've been leading, unless you want something different."

"And what if I do?"

"Then we make new plans together."

"I like what we have now. I like working with you in the bookstore."

"Then I see no reason for anything to change."

"Except for me."

He smiled. "Except for you."

I shuffled back and leaned against the wall. I closed my eyes and attempted to disentangle my dream from the reality of what had happened when the schoolhouse clock had chimed twelve.

…

Edward had laid me down on his coat, parted the skirt of my wrap dress and sunk his teeth into my left thigh.

I'd counted the seconds with each tick tock of the clock while he drank my blood – thirty seconds precisely – and then he began to lick over the bite mark, moving the fabric of my dress out of his way as he licked closer and closer to–

"Oh hell," he said, raising himself up on all fours to look at me. "Did you have to pick this night to go without underwear?"

"This dress clings," I said. "It shows every lump and bump. I never wear panties with it."

I reached down and tugged at the ties at the side of my waist, opening up the dress completely.

He swallowed. "No bra either? What on earth were you planning?"

"A last-ditch seduction?" I wasn't even certain of my own plan.

"That was hardly necessary," he said, leaning back on his heels and slowly unbuttoning his shirt. All the while his eyes roamed over my semi-naked body.

He flung his shirt to one side and unfastened the button on his pants. "Do you really love me?" he asked, pulling down the zipper.

"Yes, Edward." Please don't break my heart. "I love you."

I tried to keep my eyes on his face and chest, but it was impossible not to look lower as he eased his black pants down his thighs.

"I can't help myself, Bella." He dropped forward onto his hands, lowering his body down over mine. "I've been so patient, so good." And then he kissed me like he never had before.

He wiggled his hips and I felt his erection, cold and silky smooth, rubbing against the bite mark on my left thigh, leaving a damp, icy trail on my scarred skin.

One by one, he took each of my hands and placed them above my head, interlacing his fingers with mine. His mouth moved to my neck and I arched my back, panting with excitement, waiting for him to seize his moment.

I bent my knees up, spreading my legs wider apart and wrapping them around his waist.

"I love you, Bella," he whispered, kissing his way along my jaw. "Take me in. Make me yours."

I drew him closer, digging the heels of my boots into his backside, watching his face as he entered my body.

"If I lose control," he whispered, "if I can't hold back… will you…? Can I…?"

"Yes," I said. "My answer is yes."

But he needn't have worried. He had possessed sufficient control all along.

For a man who had never made love before, he took to it with unnatural ease. For a mind reader who could not read my mind, he soon cottoned on to which movements increased my pleasure and where best to place his lips and tongue. Or maybe those were simply the places he couldn't resist nipping and licking.

It was sweet, it was sensual and it was loving – perfect for a first time.

Having brought me to orgasm, he found his own release – strangely cold and oddly welcome – and then he collapsed to one side of me, still with the fingers of one of his hands interlaced with one of mine.

…

The schoolhouse clock chimed one, two, and I opened my eyes again.

I looked down on the floor beside me to where mine and Edward's hands had been, intertwined above my head. On one side, four deep grooves had been gouged into the floorboards. I traced them with my fingers and looked over at him.

"We made love, didn't we? Or did I dream that?"

"It wasn't a dream. You fell asleep soon afterward. You keep falling asleep."

"I'm sorry, I don't mean—"

"It's the venom, Bella. I believe it's been affecting you all along. You need to make a decision. _We_ need to make a decision. We cannot go on as we are."

"I told you you could change me."

"But you didn't know everything then and, as much as I was tempted, I did not want your decision to be governed purely by lust. Eternity is a long time to live with regrets."

"I dreamed I was talking to my dad earlier. He said there's more than one way to mend a broken heart."

"Is your heart broken?"

"It was when he died. It could be again if you left me."

"I won't ever leave you, Bella, but you could…"

"Then there is only one course of action left for us."

"I should hunt first."

"No! You don't leave here until you've pumped me full of your venom."

His lips twitched and then he started to laugh.

"Perhaps I could have phrased that a little better," I said, getting on my hands and knees and crawling across the room to him – no mean feat in a long wrap dress.

Half way across the room, I paused. "Where is the, um, mess… your venom?"

He bit his bottom lip, looking boyishly bashful before he answered. "In a handkerchief in my coat pocket."

"You carry a handkerchief?"

"At my brother's insistence, although I doubt he intended I use it like that."

"Oh." I sat back on my heels and stared at him open-mouthed. "We didn't use a condom."

"We did. I had one in my pocket."

"With your handkerchief?" He nodded. "Prepared for all eventualities?"

"Yes."

"I didn't see you put it on."

"I can be very fast when I want to be and you were quite distracted at the time."

"But I felt it when you... It was cold."

"Nevertheless, it was contained."

I thought back to our conversation in the bookstore about the vampire that impregnated human women. Edward did not want to be that kind of monster.

"Did you think I would change my mind once you'd told me everything?" I asked.

"I hoped you wouldn't."

"Even so, you wanted me to have a real choice."

"Yes."

I fell forward onto my hands and knees once more, locked eyes with Edward and inched toward him.

Finally kneeling by his side, I offered up my left wrist up to his mouth. He stared into my eyes and ran his nose back and forth over my veins before pressing his lips to my skin, waiting for permission.

"Take me, Edward," I said. "I'm yours."


	28. Emergence

**28\. Emergence**

As the venom took hold, he held me tight, my back to his chest. He wrapped his hands around my wrists, crossing my arms in front of my body, and laid his legs on top of mine to press them down onto the floor.

He had warned me. He had told me the pain of the change was indescribable and he hadn't lied. I was begging him to end it, to end me, but he didn't.

He had bitten each wrist without drawing blood and those bites had burned the instant he had licked them closed. The searing heat would not stop. It worked it's way up my arms and into my chest and, from there, it radiated out in every direction, igniting trails of flames in its wake.

Another log or two landed on my funeral pyre and an entire can of gasoline was poured on top for good measure. Fiercer flames licked up my body from the tips of my toes to the crown of my head until I was battling to maintain my sanity.

And throughout it all, a low voice spoke to me, reciting word for word one of my favourite novels.

At some point in time, I shut down and lost my mind to white, gold, orange and black.

...

Everything came to a halt as the schoolhouse clock sounded the quarter hour.

There was a man sitting right behind me. I could feel the soft hairs on his chest between my shoulder blades, the hairs on a muscled forearm tickling the undersides of my breasts and the hairs on his legs where they were draped over mine.

I could also feel the coarser hairs surrounding a certain something that apparently had a life of its own. It was nudging at my behind.

But the man was not ice cold; his temperature was not dissimilar to mine. And yet he smelled exactly like the vampire I'd spent the past six weeks falling in love with.

"Edward, is that you?" I whispered.

"Yes, Bella."

"Why aren't we wearing any clothes?"

"I didn't want to risk you ruining your lovely dress. Most people thrash around and claw at themselves during the transformation, but you had to be different, didn't you?"

"Did you think there was a possibility I might ruin your clothes too?"

"It did cross my mind, yes." I tilted my head up and back and got caught in the intensity of his gaze. "I needed to feel your skin, Bella. You were so still, so quiet, it was driving me insane with worry."

"I was not still! I was wracked with pain! My body was convulsing with it. I screamed for you to help me countless times. Didn't you hear me?"

"Oh, Bella." The arm under my breasts squeezed a little tighter. Perhaps my dream had been more prescient than I could ever have imagined.

"You're not cold," I said.

"I am, but then so are you now."

"Is it strange, me not being warmer than you?"

"A little."

I took a deep breath in. "You smell the same but… more."

"Yes," he said, rubbing his nose on mine. "So do you."

"What day is it?"

"Saturday, past one in the morning."

"The bookstore!" I wriggled in his arms, trying to get up.

"Will be fine," he said, his limbs keeping me firmly in place.

"But–"

His hand cupped my face and then his lips were on mine, his tongue working its way into my mouth and, for once, not preventing mine from reciprocating.

My entire body was instantly ablaze, but in no way did those flames resemble the ones that had raged through me while I was changing.

His hands wandered all over me, but I wanted to be able to touch him too. I broke away from him, gasping for air before realising I didn't need it, and turned around to straddle his thighs.

I lifted myself up on my knees, ready to take him inside me, but he gripped my hips and moved his mouth to my neck and chest. I tilted my head back and sucked in another breath, but this time the air felt like acid in my throat.

"Did you bring any water?" I asked.

"You can't drink water, Bella," he said against my breast. "It's blood for you from here on out."

"But I'm so thirsty, Edward."

He pulled back, looking me in the eye. "Seriously? Right now?"

"Yes."

He sighed and lifted me off his lap and onto the floor. "After all the times you've practically begged me to have sex with you," he muttered, shaking his head as he got to his feet.

Seconds later, his shirt landed on my thighs. "Put that on," he said as he pulled on his pants and attempted to fasten them over his erection. "No, wait! Let me do the bu– Oh!"

"What?" I said, pushing the last button through its hole. I rolled up the sleeves to just below my elbows.

He blew out a breath. "Nothing. Let's go."

...

I ran through the forest, weaving in and out of the trees, wearing nought but Edward's button down shirt. Neither my dress nor my cloak would have survived at that speed, not with so many leaps, twists and turns.

Coming to an abrupt halt, I sniffed the air. In among the myriad of scents, I could smell Edward on his shirt, on my skin and in the air behind me. I could also smell something that made my mouth fill with venom.

"Listen for the heartbeat, Bella," Edward said, stopping some distance behind me. "Do you hear the blood pumping around its body?"

"What is it?" I leaned in the direction of my dinner.

"Mountain lion," he said. "Try not to let it shred my shirt."

His shirt survived; the mountain lion did not. I looked up from the ground, letting the carcass fall from my hands, and addressed my audience of one. "How come you've managed to ruin so many clothes?"

"You try hunting in a constant state of arousal."

"What?"

"All those nights, Bella, you tormented me in your sleep."

"I did not!" I stood up and brushed the mulch off my legs.

He pointed to one corner of his mouth. "You have a little blood…"

I dragged my tongue across my bottom lip, catching the errant drop and shuddering at the taste of it. Edward's eyes darkened.

"I used to be the neatest hunter in my family," he said, "never even a stray drop of blood on my chin, and then you came along and had me so distracted." He smiled. "I only have to think of you when I'm hunting and I fall over my feet."

"Did you ever stop to…?"

"What?"

I swallowed, keeping my eyes on his face. "Take matters into your own hands?"

He suddenly looked sheepish and maybe even a tiny bit guilty. "Sometimes," he said, "and sometimes it just, er, spilled over while I was busy quenching my thirst."

I let my eyes travel down the centre of his bare torso. His black pants were hanging very low on his hips and appeared to be a rather snug fit at the front.

Mine! I thought as I licked my lips and stalked toward my mate.

For every step I took forward, he took one back until he was up against the thick trunk of an ancient tree. I grabbed his wrists and placed his hands flat on the tree either side of his hips.

"Keep them there for me," I said, undoing the fly on his pants.

I worked his pants down his hips and then dragged them down his legs as I dropped to my knees on the forest floor. Shuffling back a little, I bent forward and brought my face right down to his left ankle. Then I ran my nose and tongue through the hairs on his shin, working my way up his leg until my mouth was perfectly positioned on his upper thigh, my nose just short of his testicles.

Mine! I sank my teeth into his flesh and he bucked.

"Oh, Bella!"

And then I licked and licked at my mark, all the while increasing the area of skin my tongue covered. He moaned and groaned and begged me to do something for him that no one else ever had.

I teased him with my tongue for as long as I could and then went in for the kill.

"Oh hell! Don't stop, Bella! Please!"

I didn't stop, at least not until he'd quit cursing and relaxed his grip on my hair.

"You didn't keep your hands on the tree trunk," I said, looking up at him.

His grin was lazy and replete. "I didn't need to."

I raised an eyebrow and, ever so slowly, I unbuttoned his shirt, one little black button at a time. He watched my every move, his tongue peeking out when I let the fabric fall from my shoulders and slither down my arms onto the ground.

As I rose to my feet, I rubbed my body up the length of his, blowing air at the underside of his jaw. In an instant, he brought his hands to my hips and spun us around, lifting me up and positioning himself between my thighs.

He thrust up into me. "I don't believe you're a newborn vampire," he said, leaning down to lick my breast.

I arched my back and grabbed his shoulders, pushing my chest into his face.

He pulled out of me and thrust back in with more force. "You're far too in control of yourself." Another swipe of his tongue, another powerful thrust. "In fact, if you hadn't broken my skin when you bit my thigh, I'd have wondered if my venom had done its job properly."

"Aaah." Two could play that game. "It seems you've drunk so much of my blood, it's turned you half human," I said. "Weren't you supposed to break me in the throes of passion?"

That stopped him in his tracks – or mid-thrust to be precise. He dipped his head and squeezed his eyes shut. His voice was low and quiet. "Am I not a good enough lover, Bella? Am I disappointing you?"

And didn't I feel foolish?

I wove my hands into his hair and raised his head, kissing his eyelids, his nose and his lips. "I only meant to tease you like you were me," I whispered, brushing my lips along the line of his jaw to his ear. "If you were able to read my mind, you couldn't be better at pleasing me."

When he didn't move, I wiggled my hips, grinding against his pubic bone. "Tell me what you want, Edward."

He drew his head back a little and opened his eyes. "I want to make love with you the old-fashioned way."

"How old-fashioned are we talking here?"

"Early twentieth century," he said, his eyes twinkling.

"Oh, so you want me to lie back and think of Queen and country?"

"Not quite. We are Americans, after all."

"Didn't we do missionary already?"

His grin was verging on the sinister. "Not as vampires."

Keeping us joined, he turned and laid me on the ground so carefully, it was in complete contrast to the passion that then proceeded to exude his every pore. I would have sworn that with each thrust of his hips the scenery changed, but the multiple orgasms could have been messing with my brain.

Did I care? Not one bit.

Afterward, on Edward's instruction, I fed twice more. We washed the forest from our hair and bodies under a waterfall and then made love once again before returning to the schoolhouse to get properly dressed.

To preserve my cloak and wrap dress, we took our time on the run home. Then, as the scents of the city became stronger, I realised the real test of my control was only minutes away.

…

We made it back to my apartment unscathed – well, not us, but the good folk of Port Angeles.

Most humans at that time of a Saturday morning were probably still tucked up in bed or eating their breakfast. Those on their way to work were sealed inside their cars, thus dampening the attraction of their scents, although I did have to force an image from my mind of me peeling back a car roof like the top on a can of sardines to get to them.

Edward suggested we go straight to the store before more people were out and about. Visions of succulent, little children on the school run filled my head. Thankfully, Saturday was not a school day.

It was odd smelling my human self in my apartment, but I ignored it and changed into some jeans and a long sleeved T-shirt. Then, without thinking, I walked into the bathroom to comb my hair and, of course, caught sight of myself in the mirror.

I had already been quite pale and, being used to seeing Edward's skin, my new colouring was hardly a surprise, but my skin was devoid of all prior imperfections, my facial features were more refined and my eyes were blood red.

Edward appeared behind me in the mirror and my irises expanded, almost obliterating the red completely.

"Huh!" I said.

He smirked. "Come on, you."

Going back to the closet, I shoved my feet into my boots and wrapped my cloak around my shoulders. Then I grabbed my purse and followed Edward out to my truck.

We had quite the debate over who should drive. Was it better for his hands to be free to restrain me, should I smell something irresistible, or should he drive, lest I tear my truck apart during a sudden surge of bloodlust?

Eventually, we settled on him driving and me sitting so close to him I was practically in his lap. In the hope that I would be too enraptured to care about any other scent, he put his right arm around my shoulders and drew me in so my face was pressed into his neck.

He suggested I put my face down close to another part of his anatomy, but I wasn't too keen on my first slip-up being an officer of the law.

"You know I'd hear them before they stopped us, don't you, Bella?"

"It's not happening, Edward. Not during daylight hours anyway."

"It's barely light yet. Ouch!" I'd elbowed him in the side. "You'd do that, though? For me? After dark?"

"You'd better calm that thing down or it won't be me causing a public disturbance."

He parked the truck and we walked down the side alley to the front of the bookstore. Everything looked normal but when I put my key into the first lock, it didn't turn. I tried the other one.

"It's not locked," I whispered. "I'd swear I closed up properly on Wednesday."

"Perhaps Mrs C–"

"She walks through walls and windows. She doesn't need her keys."

Edward pushed the door open and, as was always the case, the bell clanged loudly announcing our presence to all and sundry. I followed Edward inside, keen to get the door closed and stop the infernal racket that was ringing in my newly sensitive ears.

Edward took a deep breath in through his nose and stiffened.

"What?" I whispered, sniffing the air. "What is it?"

"Another vampire."


	29. Reveal

**29\. Reveal**

The tall, dark-haired vampire that stepped out from between the bookcases couldn't have looked less pleased to see customers. His burgundy eyes snapped straight to Edward in a way that put my hackles up. Was a woman not deserving of his brooding stare?

"How may I help you?" he asked, drawing each word out in an accent that was certainly not American.

"That's my line," I said.

He cocked his head to one side. "Excuse me?"

I put every effort into smiling politely. "How may I help you?"

His eyes widened. "Well, that rather depends on who you are, doesn't it?"

"My name is Isabella Swan. I'm the manager of this bookstore. Might I ask how you got in?"

"I used my keys."

"Your keys?" Only three people possessed a set of keys to the store and one did not have need of them.

His lips twitched as he patted his pants pocket, ensuring I would hear the pieces of metal clanking against one another. I looked back up at his face and studied him.

He was young, maybe in his early twenties, perhaps a little too young to be in a romantic relationship with a forty-five year old woman without generating unpleasant gossip.

"Alistair?"

"Indeed. Now, where have you been, Isabella? I have been minding the store since Thursday afternoon and it would seem we have increased our clientele substantially in my absence, not least to include some rather boisterous male students."

He arched an eyebrow at me. If only he knew where the blame lay for that particular phenomenon.

"Oh. Um… Would you believe I've been turning into a vampire?"

"Ah." He nodded and turned his attention back to Edward. "So you must be…"

"Edward Cullen," Edward said, extending his right arm and shaking hands with Alistair. "Bella's mate."

"Cullen? I have a close acquaintance who goes by that name."

"Carlisle is my sire."

Alistair's eyes widened in surprise. "How is he? It's been well over a century since we last visited with each other."

Mrs C had said time didn't mean the same thing for vampires, but not seeing someone you referred to as a close acquaintance for over one hundred years seemed to stretch that statement to its very limits. I glanced at Edward but, apparently, he wasn't phased.

"My father was in good health when last I saw him," he said, "as were all my family."

"Carlisle has a family?"

"Yes. There are seven of us – eight now that I've found my mate."

Turning to me, Alistair said, "Do you intend to leave my employ?"

"I'd like to stay, for us both to work here, but I don't know if I can refrain…"

"Bella is exceptionally contained for a newborn," Edward said, "but as yet untested with human blood." Then, as he finished his sentence, a sly smile crept across his face.

I wasn't smiling, though. I'd heard his heartbeat before he'd even become visible through the window and I had sucked in two lungfuls of his scent before I'd thought to hold my breath.

The bell clanged ominously as the door swung open and the look on Mike's face shifted from happy relief to absolute terror in the same split second.

"Don't run!" Edward said.

I had no intention of moving, let alone running. I was too busy trying to root myself to the spot.

"Try to breathe a little slower," Edward said. I'd stopped breathing and I wasn't about to start again while Mike was still within sniffing distance. "It will lower your heart rate."

What?

"You did it," Mike whispered, looking right at me. A tear escaped one eye and rolled down his cheek. I nodded. "Your eyes are red. Are you going to…? Do you want my…?"

I frowned and shook my head, flexing my hands to keep them from curling up into claws. Venom was repeatedly filling my mouth and each time I swallowed it down, more came to replace it.

"You're doing well, Bella," Edward murmured so low I wondered if Mike could hear him. "Do you want him?"

Yes! "No," I whispered through clenched teeth and barely parted lips.

"It's probably best that you leave for now, Mike," Edward said. "Slow and steady."

My heart sank, watching Mike turn and go. He walked back to his store with his head down and his hands quivering. I wanted to cry but no tears would come.

"Well, she cannot be doing this every time a customer comes in, can she?" Alistair said.

"What would you rather she do?" Edward replied. "Drink first and ask how she might help them later? She is less than half a day old and she just resisted her first human – her long-time friend. Could you have done that?" He paused to stare at Alistair's tormented expression. "No, I thought not."

I looked down at the floor. "I love this store, Alistair, and I love my home above Mrs C's, but I'll understand if you want to find someone new – someone human."

"I don't know," he said. "Shelly said that– "

"She told me about you and her."

"She did?"

"She encouraged me to make the change before it was too late."

"I still love her. I still want her. That's why I come back."

"That's why she waits for you. I'd have done the same for Edward."

Edward's arms wrapped around me, pulling my face into his chest."

"She hoped this was the reason for your absence," Alistair said. "Maybe I should go and give her the good news. Edward, can you manage alone?"

Edward's chest rumbled as he spoke. "I'm not alone. I have Bella."

…

Alistair had not kept the inventory up to date but he had at least kept a pencil written list of sales. There weren't many but I wasn't overly surprised given his less than personable demeanour.

I also wasn't surprised that he hadn't tackled any of the online orders. I sent out an email to our customers, apologising for the delay and advising that their orders would be fulfilled the following week.

Edward marvelled at my motor skills as I seemed to instinctively know how much pressure to use on the computer keyboard, much as I had with the buttons on his black shirt. We both wondered if the traces of venom from his little feeding sessions had played some part in that.

And so, I kept myself busy at my desk all day, holding my breath every single time the bell above the door clanged. Once, when it got too much, I hid in the restroom, sniffing first the soap and then the bottle of bleach beside the toilet, until Edward told me it was safe to come out.

From then on, we kept the front door wedged open. It was cold and breezy out but, thankfully, not wet.

Much was my relief when, on the drive home, Edward took a detour and parked near the edge of the forest. He leaned across me and opened my door.

"Are you letting me off the leash?" I asked.

"You'd better be quick, Bella. I need to take you home to bed. You're looking very tired."

"I am?"

"Most definitely."

…

"Is it turning you on, smelling the human me on these sheets?" I asked, turning my head to watch him.

"Yes and no." He sniffed my pillow and lay back down beside me. "I've conditioned myself to hold back and now I don't have to, but you don't smell that different for being a vampire. It's just more intense."

I looked back up the ceiling joist. "Shall we play a game?"

"What kind of game?"

"Truth or dare, except without the dare."

"This sounds an awful lot like your game of twenty questions, Bella."

"No, no. It's different, entirely." I schooled my face. "I'll recall something you told me when I didn't believe you were a vampire and you can tell me if it's true."

"I've never lied to you, Bella, so there's little point in going over old ground."

I glanced at him. "So, you really are six foot two?"

"Would you like me to stand against a wall so you can check? You'll need to stand on a chair, mind."

"Watch it!" I said, elbowing his side.

"You know everything I told you about me is true. You only had to look in the mirror to see the colour of your eyes and the pallor of your skin. The hearing, the speed, the breathing and the diet – you've experienced these for yourself already."

I rolled onto on my side and got caught in his gaze.

"When you first stand in the sunlight," he said, "you will see yourself sparkle. When you first touch a human, you'll feel the difference in temperature. And the only reason you needed the restroom today was to distract yourself from eating a boy intent on feeling up your mate."

"Don't remind me." I placed my hand firmly on what was mine.

"Yours," he said, laughing.

I tightened my grip. "You told me it took three days to change into a vampire."

His entire body stiffened, not just the part in my hand. "That wasn't a lie, Bella."

"Then why did it only take me two?"

"I don't know," he whispered. "Maybe my venom..."

I climbed on top of him and sat up, rubbing myself all over his erection. "Or my sheer bloody-mindedness."

His jaw dropped. I winked at him, changed the angle of my hips and took him inside me, making him groan. He gripped my hips with both hands.

"You still can't read my mind," I said.

"No, but you know I read Alistair's. You could tell."

"Yes. Maybe."

His hands glided up to touch my breasts, his thumbs brushing over my nipples.

"Oh! How old are you, Edward?"

"One hundred and eleven."

"And how old were you when you were changed." I swivelled my hips.

"O–Old enough to be legal in the State of Washington."

Was it possible for a vampire to turn any paler? "You weren't playing with me?"

"I told you, I was–"

"Seventeen?! You meant it?"

His hands flew back to my hips, holding me firmly in place. "Oh no," he said. "You're not going anywhere. Breathe through it, Bella. Forget about numbers and focus on us, together, like this for all eternity."

He did that thing with his eyes where I couldn't look away. There had been me thinking it was meant to ensnare his prey when maybe, after all, he had been silently telling me how he felt all along.

The grip on my hips got lighter and his hands travelled up my sides and around my back, pulling me down toward him.

"Kiss me, Bella," he whispered. "Show me it doesn't matter to you."

"But seventeen, Edward!"

"My driver's licence says I'm twenty-four."

"That's still younger than me!"

He flipped me onto my back and pressed his mouth to mine. Then he began to slide in and out of me so very slowly I ached for more. My hands reached down to grip his behind.

"Would that I had found _you_ when you were still seventeen," he murmured, lifting his head and arching his back.

"I wasn't quite so curvy then." I smiled against his throat and nipped his skin. "Or as experienced."

I might have broken his carefully crafted civility with those few words. It was a testament to the quality of my sofabed that it survived the pounding.

…

Steam billowed out of the bathroom. I could see it out of the corner of my eye, although my attention was fixed elsewhere.

"What are you doing up there, Bella?"

"Reading." I swung my legs back and forth and turned the page. "Oh, hello!"

Edward landed smoothly on the joist beside me, somehow managing to maintain his modesty. He leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"Nice outfit," I said, tugging at the top edge of his bath towel. "You should wear that one to work."

"I'm not sure Alistair would approve."

"Mrs C would, though. She really likes you."

"Yes, she does."

"I really like you, too."

"In that case, I'll stay right here."

"Are you sure this is where you want to be?"

"By your side on a joist? Absolutely, although you are a little overdressed."

I was wearing my panties and Edward's shirt.

"Next time I'll wear a bedsheet," I said, "but I meant living here in my little one room apartment with the sloping ceiling above the shower. Don't you miss anything from your family home? Your own books and music…"

"Not as much as I would have thought, but if my family gets in touch…"

"Would your things fit in here?"

"We might need another bookcase or three and some storage for my music collection, but I could always put my things in the kitchen cabinets." He bumped his shoulder against mine.

"I'll need to empty those out, won't I?"

"There's no hurry, except for the perishable items."

"It seems weird, the thought of not using my kitchen anymore."

"We've always had a kitchen in every home, whether we've remodelled or not."

"Why?"

"Appearances sake, for when humans come knocking. Occasionally, Carlisle and Esme would entertain his colleagues from one hospital or other. They still do, except they no longer have to pretend to eat and drink."

"What did you do on those occasions?"

"Provide background music, playing the piano."

"Oh! Would you want to bring your piano here?"

"It wouldn't fit. Besides, it belongs in my family home, wherever that is."

"Don't you miss playing it?"

"Sometimes, but I seem to have found other things to keep my hands occupied."

"Oh really? Like what?"

He stared into my eyes, his getting darker by the second. "Do you remember the morning you woke up and saw me up here?"

"You said you were resisting temptation."

"Yes."

"Because I was talking in my sleep and… What exactly was I doing that had you perched up here?"

"A gentleman never tells, Bella, but if you'd like to hop down, perhaps I could show you."

…

It was that brief period of time between dawn and sunrise that had once appealed to Edward when the world was a different place for him. We lay on our sides staring at each other, his forefinger tracing over the features of my face.

"I feel like I'm in a dream," I said.

"Why?"

"It's too easy."

"Maybe that's how it's meant to be, for you I mean."

"But I haven't lost anything."

He smiled. "Except grilled cheese and tomato soup."

"Except that."

"And maybe your friends for a short while until you can be sure you won't eat them."

"Yeah."

"And that's one advantage of our being accepted into society. In times gone by, you'd have had to give up everything."

"Like you did?"

"In a way, except I'd lost everything already, Bella. Both my parents had gone and I was about to join them. And you have lost your father. I'd say that was enough, wouldn't you?"

"Maybe. I don't know."

He fiddled with a lock of my hair. "Just wait until you've lived ten years unchanged. Your friends will have aged a little, maybe had children, but you will look the same as you do today. In thirty years, they'll be looking much older, at best moaning about aching joints, at worst more serious health complaints. And then, in fifty years, they may well have gone and you will be left watching their children's children have families of their own."

I grabbed his hand and kissed it. "But I'll still have you."

"You might be bored with me by then." He winked.

"Somehow I doubt that."

"It's almost light outside. What say you we go out for breakfast and then spend the rest of the day writing."

"Is writing a euphemism for something else?"

"You tell me."

And so we raced to get dressed and out of the front door, jogging along the quiet streets of Port Angeles until we reached the forest.


	30. Testing

**30\. Testing**

For Edward and his family, their human memories had taken some time to resurface, with only the more immediate events preceding their change staying intact on awaking. That said, Edward had been so ill, Carlisle had had to fill even those blanks at first.

For me, the transition was seamless. I realised with hindsight why he had suggested I record my memories of my father and why he had given me one of his treasured notebooks and his fountain pen to do it.

He was less keen for me to use his fountain pen as a newborn vampire, though. So, after our hunt, he left me at home and ran to the stationers with my credit card to buy me my own.

I had sneaked his pen and was writing in my large, green fabric covered book with the black spine when he walked through the front door.

"Recalled to life," I said.

"What's that?" he said, hanging up his coat.

"You were reciting A Tale Of Two Cities while I was changing."

"I was." He smiled and placed a small paper bag down in front of me on the kitchen table.

"It's one of my favourite books."

"Mine too."

"Thank you, Edward."

"For what?"

"Lending me your fountain pen," I said, smiling down at the page of writing in front of me, "and for recalling me to life."

When I glanced back up through my lashes, I witnessed the most beautiful of smiles grace his face.

He unpacked the bag, placing two bottles of dark blue ink on the table. From his shirt pocket, he retrieved an antique pen not dissimilar to his own.

"Would you like to keep mine?" he asked, staring pointedly at my right hand.

I nodded, swallowing down the emotion that was surely written all over my face.

"Oh!" he said. "Angela is here."

A minute later, I heard her coming up the steps. There was a knock on the door and, after a pause, another knock.

"Bella, I know you're in there," she shouted.

"Your truck is on the driveway," Edward whispered. "She has no intention of leaving until she has seen you."

"What do we do?"

"How long can you hold your breath?"

"I should have started already. I can smell her, Edward, and I can hear her blood coursing through her veins."

"Focus on how you would feel if you were to hurt her."

I shook my head. "I can't."

"You must, Bella. This is your best friend."

I closed my eyes and stopped breathing, thinking of the last time we had had coffee. Could we do that still? Would she want to when I would be no more than an observer?

"Perhaps it would be better if you were outside," Edward said. "Wait here a moment."

I opened my eyes and watched him walk to the door. When he opened it, a cold breeze blew in across my face and I could almost taste Angela's scent in the air on my tongue, despite having held my breath.

"Hello, Angela," Edward said softly. "Bella will come and talk to you, but it would be better for everyone if there was some measure of distance between you both. Would you mind standing by your car?"

"I'll be at the bottom of the steps and that's as far as I'm going."

"Thank you." He leaned out of the door to watch her retreat. Then, undoing a couple of his shirt buttons, he beckoned me over and pulled me into his arms.

He rubbed his face all over mine and tilted his chin up so my nose was at his throat. "Breathe me in, Bella."

I took in a lungful of his scent and, mindful of the fact Angela's scent was still hanging in the air, I licked him until he was all I could taste on my tongue. Only then did we walk out onto the top step.

We sat side by side, Edward keeping one arm around the back of my waist and the other across the front of my body. I held onto that arm with both hands.

"It's true then," Angela said, looking up at us.

"Yes," I whispered, using some of my precious air to speak.

"Mike told me to stay away but I had to see for myself. When did you…?"

"After your Halloween party. The one you didn't attend."

Angela frowned. "I didn't have a party this year. What I did do was spend the evening sitting at home with a bottle of wine, wondering when my friend was going to turn up. My friend who I'd thought I was about to lose until she bought me a giant slice of chocolate layer cake and then called out across the street that she'd see me on Halloween!"

Wide-eyed, I turned and looked at Edward.

"Alice!" he said. "I should have guessed."

"Who's Alice?" Angela asked.

"The Rent-A-Vampire agent," I said, almost out of air.

"My sister," Edward said.

Angela laughed. "Well, it looks to me like she knew what she was doing. Are you happy?"

I nodded and tugged at Edward's shirt.

"What?" he asked.

"Off."

He undid a few more buttons and pulled it over his head, handing it to me before wrapping his arms back around me again. I buried my face in the fabric and inhaled.

"Are you in love?" Angela asked.

While I nodded furiously, Edward grinned and said, "Yes, she is."

"Maybe this was what you were always meant to be," Angela said.

I lowered the shirt. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know. You're happy and in love and you haven't lunged at me yet. You didn't even kill Mike when you had the chance. Something about that suggests you've taken to it already."

"She has," Edward said.

"It's as if all you needed was a shift in DNA."

I shook my head. "But I never believed in any of it."

She put her index finger on her lips. "Hmm. I wonder if Jacob sensed something, if that was why he was so drawn to you."

Edward snorted.

"He didn't want me becoming a vampire."

"He wanted you to be part of his pack," Angela said.

Strangely, Edward didn't find that so funny.

"His pack?" I asked, bringing Edward's shirt up to my face for another lungful of his scent.

She nodded. "He's the alpha now. Sam stood down."

I didn't really know what she was talking about but, from the subtle shift in his body, I suspected it meant something to Edward.

"But Jacob couldn't have changed me into a wolf."

"No, but you'd still have been living a supernatural life. Imagine what your kids would become when they grew up."

The thought of having a litter of Jacob's pups was nothing short of terrifying, but maybe she was right. I hadn't stood a hope in hell of avoiding the supernatural.

"My dad didn't leave me when he died," I said.

"What?"

"He stayed at home in Forks."

"You mean… as a ghost?" Her voice rose and then her face fell.

"I couldn't tell you, Angela. I couldn't tell anyone. I didn't want him to be dead. I wouldn't let myself believe it… not until Edward met him and…"

"And then you were able to let him go. Oh, Bella! That's when you finally started coming to terms with it."

"Yeah." I wrapped my arms around myself just above Edward's.

"You can't cry can you."

"No."

"Come here."

"I shouldn't."

"Just do it, Bella. If you were going to eat me, you'd have done it by now."

I looked at Edward.

"I'm not taking my pants off," he said, "but you can stick your face in my chest if it helps."

Half laughing, I did just that and then I held my breath once more and walked slowly down the steps. As soon as my feet touched the driveway, Angela wrapped her arms around me. She felt so warm and so soft.

After a minute or so, she let go and I stepped back. She had tears trailing down her face. I turned and ran back up the steps and sat down again.

"Ben and I met up for a drink," she said, with a watery smile.

I couldn't contain my grin. "Really? When?"

"Last night. It was... I can't believe it, Bella. I had visions of him telling me he was with someone and not to bother him again, but he… Once we'd cleared the air, it was as if we'd never been apart."

"Oh, Angela!"

"I want you to meet him again. With Edward, if you like."

"I will, Angela, in time, when I can be sure of myself."

"How long will that take?"

"I don't know." My throat was beginning to burn. "I need you to go now. Just… could you wait there until we've gone inside?"

She blew me a kiss. "Bye, Bella."

Edward steered me back into the apartment, pushed me up against the wall beside the closet and kissed me until the coast was clear.

"We had better go for a little run," he said, "but we'll take the truck to the edge of the forest, alright?"

I nodded.

And despite it being light outside, I threw a small amount of my caution to the wind and rode beside him, head down, making him a very happy vampire.

…

We stayed in the forest until after sunset. I'd had my fill of elk and deer but, with the right amount of persuasion, I could certainly have found room for dessert.

Leaning against a tree, I examined my mate. The shirt I had borrowed to keep me from pouncing on Angela had been ripped open from collar to hem and was flapping in the breeze. His jeans were being held together by a couple of safety pins, which he'd said he'd been keeping in his pocket for just such an occasion.

No mountain lion could be held responsible for his punk rock makeover; that particular honour belonged entirely to me.

The wind picked up a little, almost removing Edward's shirt.

"What is that smell?" I asked, screwing up my face.

"Wolf." Edward wrinkled his nose.

"Should I want to eat it?"

"I wouldn't recommend this particular breed of wolf. You might get a nasty case of indigestion."

"It's Jacob, isn't it?"

"Yes, and he isn't intending to be very sociable. Stay close to me."

"I can look after myself now."

"Wolves are made to kill us, Bella. Stay close."

"You want my protection," I said, joking.

His smile was sly. "Did I not tell you vampires are at their strongest in their first year?"

"But you held me back when Angela…"

"It was an illusion. You could have broken free at any moment."

"Huh."

"Like I said, you are far too controlled. He's here."

The giant russet wolf emerged from the dark depths of the forest and sauntered into the small clearing where we were standing.

"He won't shift to human form while there are two of us," Edward said. "Her eyes are red because she's a newborn. They won't change for some time yet."

"You're being incredibly rude, Jacob," I said. "Considering our last meeting, you could at least have the decency to let me in on the conversation."

"It's not you he wants, Bella. It's me."

I moved to stand in front of Edward so fast, the wolf jumped back a couple of feet, but his stance had shifted. He was poised and ready to attack. As I leaned forward to match him, I glimpsed a movement in the trees.

"Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"I can see two more sets of eyes in the trees."

"I know."

"Are they going to hurt us?"

"They remember you. You hired them – no, one of them, but they both share similar memories of the same party. Oh! The three of you were dancing and–"

"Embry?"

One set of yellow eyes disappeared and a few seconds later Embry strolled out into the open in his old cut-off jeans, accompanied by a giant chocolate brown wolf.

"Hi Bella," he said, running his hand through the chocolate wolf's thick pelt. "Sorry about Jake. He's been struggling with the whole live and let live thing recently."

Jacob hadn't moved.

"You don't say, Embry. Stalking people is an offence, you know. I should report him."

"Our tribespeople have a very long history with the Cold Ones and our, er, dislike of them is innate to some extent, as you can see. It's difficult to ignore the persistent urge to kill vampires, especially for the alpha."

"It's difficult to ignore the persistent urge to suck humans dry, Embry, but here I am, holding myself back."

"Oh hell!"

"What is it, Edward?" I took a fleeting glance behind me and turned back to glare at Embry.

It seemed while my eyes had been darting between Embry and Jacob, Quil had sneaked around behind me, lowered his head and pointed his muzzle at Edward's safety-pinned fly.

"Sorry, Bella," Embry said. "He can't help himself. Putting the cold-blooded thing aside, your friend is very attractive."

"My _mate_ has a name, Embry, and putting the giant furball thing aside, Edward is not Quil's type!"

Jacob had obviously decided he'd had enough. He puffed himself up and Quil whimpered and ran back into the trees. As Embry slowly retreated after him, I stared into Jacob's yellow eyes.

Gone were the puppy dog eyes he'd shown me whenever he wanted some food. Gone was the hangdog expression too. These eyes showed none of the affection for me they had once had.

"Did you ever see that movie with the professor-come-adventurer?" I asked. "What was his name? He wore a hat and carried a whip and a notebook. He was gruff, ruggedly handsome and quite the historian."

Jacob let out a low growl. Perhaps Angela had made him sit through the movie twice too.

"I remember, there was this one scene where he'd had enough of fighting it out with his bare hands, so he pulled out his gun and shot his assailant. Job done."

Edward snorted behind me. "I've had my hands all over you today and I didn't notice you were carrying a gun, Bella. Where on earth are you hiding it?"

"I haven't got a gun, Edward, but I have had enough. You said I'm at my strongest now and yet I haven't let rip once since you changed me."

"You did rip my shirt and the fly on my jeans." He moved to my side and I was hard pressed to keep my eyes on the wolf.

"That was playful exuberance and I apologised, on my knees, twice. Besides, I'd never have risked damaging _your_ equipment. Someone else's, on the other hand– Oh! Where's Jacob?"

"I think our scintillating conversation bored him away."

"I scared him away, you mean."

"There is nothing scary about you, Bella."

Off in the distance, we heard a chorus of howls, one far more pitiful than the other two.

"Do you think we've seen the last of them?" I asked.

"I doubt it."


	31. Loose end

**31\. Loose end**

They say time heals and indeed it does, especially when one is loved by a vampire with the patience of Edward Cullen. Time can also serve to make a newborn vampire more resistant to the draw of human blood, especially when said vampire has the most persistent friends.

Mike and Angela took turns coming into the bookstore each day, venturing closer and closer until the day Angela surprised me with an enthusiastic hug. She confessed that she hadn't stopped to think, she was just so thrilled to see her best friend smiling again. I teased her that she was really just thrilled to be best friends with a real live vampire. Two days later, she surprised me again by bringing someone in with her.

Poor Ben hung back by the door, his eyes darting warily between Edward and me, whispering to Angela to not stand too close. If we had wanted to eat her, or him for that matter, distance would not have been an issue.

It took a few more visits for Ben to actually step into the store, but once Edward had managed to engage him in conversation and had shown him where the graphic novels were housed, he began to relax around us both.

In those months following my change, Edward and I maintained a similar weekly routine to the one we'd had when I was human, except our nights were spent writing, reading and dreaming, or should I say living out the dreams of old.

Although I made less mess around the apartment as a vampire, some cleaning was still necessary, as was doing the laundry. The latter was still our favourite opportunity to catch up with our dear landlady, together or independently.

Shopping was naturally reduced to a bare minimum because both food shopping and cooking had been replaced by hunts – or dinner dates as I liked to call them – in the Olympic forest and further afield.

With my outgoings greatly reduced, I agreed to take a cut in pay so that Alistair could afford to add Edward to the payroll. With our accommodation included, neither of us needed much in the way of disposable income, nor were we left wanting.

Alistair stayed much closer to home on his forays for new stock, barely leaving the state for more than three days at a stretch, not that we ever saw him in the store again during opening hours. And when Edward set up a regular storytime on Saturday mornings, Alistair began to actively seek out additions to the children's section, thus ensuring the success of the weekly event.

At one such gathering, one of the mothers asked Edward if he would consider running an adult storytime. I stepped in immediately to answer her query, calmly pointing out that we didn't sell that kind of picture book while internally reminding myself it didn't pay to eat the customers in front of their children.

Later on, Edward tried to explain that picture books were not what she had had in mind. She may have fooled the mind reader with her supposed penchant for vampire novels, but she hadn't fooled me.

All in all, I thought I was adjusting to being a vampire pretty well. Only one feature of my modified existence still threw me and that was my skin in the sunlight.

The first time I caught the sun, Edward and I were frolicking on an empty beach after an afternoon swim sometime in November. The clouds shifted and, even though I knew what it was, I couldn't help rubbing at my skin, trying to get the glitter off.

Edward gave me a lopsided smile and offered to lick it off. He swore it would work. I knew he was lying but said yes anyway. He licked me everywhere. Then I noticed he was suffering from the same condition. We kept at it until the sun had set and our skin had returned to normal.

After that, I began to take a very keen interest in the local online weather reports.

…

One bright, sunny Tuesday morning in early June, Edward and I dashed at lightning speed from the truck to the store, neither of us wanting to be responsible for blinding the locals or for causing a pile up in the centre of town.

We opened up the store, wedged the door open and settled ourselves into the exciting tasks of cataloguing a collection of old crime novels and fulfilling the online orders that had come in over the weekend.

Hearing footsteps enter the store, I looked up from my computer. There, standing in a shaft of sunlight, stood a petite, well-manicured vampire wearing a pale yellow shift dress and a wide-brimmed straw hat.

If she had looked my way at all, I'd have voiced my recognition, but she was facing the cash desk, glaring at Edward.

Her tall, blond-haired companion removed his cowboy hat and hung it on the coat stand. He strolled over to my desk, winked at me and parked his behind on the arm of the battered leather chair as if he were expecting to see a showdown.

"What _are_ you doing?" Alice said, for it was none other than the little trickster.

"Working in a bookstore," Edward replied, pushing a book and a despatch note into a padded envelope.

"You were supposed to claim your mate and come home."

"It's a bit difficult to come home when you don't know where home is anymore, Alice."

"We've been in Denali all this time."

"How was I supposed to know that when every single phone number I tried was either unanswered or dead and every single email I sent bounced back?"

Alice put her hands on her hips. "You could have come looking."

"And leave my human mate at the mercy of a pack of wolves? Are you out of your mind? You set me up and disappeared. You cut me off. You even froze my accounts."

"About that last one, that was all Jasper's idea. By the looks of you, it wasn't his best."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Thrift store clothing, Edward? Really?" She wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"It doesn't matter what he wears," I said, pushing my chair back and standing up. "He always looks very appealing to me."

"But—"

"Not that I care much about appearances, but he also blends in better around here than he did when he first arrived. He doesn't want an excess of attention."

"I do, Bella," Edward said, "but only from you."

"The game is over, Edward," Alice said. "Esme and Carlisle have bought a new family home on the outskirts of Seattle. You can bring your discerning mate and rejoin the family."

Edward's eyes darkened. "No."

"No?"

"What was your little game about, Alice? Didn't you want me to live in the new modern society that you love so much?"

"Yes, but–"

"Well, congratulations! You've achieved your goal."

"Not like this, Edward. Not in a town like this, working in a used bookstore. Surely Bella wants a better life than this?"

"Nope," I said, smiling at Edward, "I'm perfectly content with what I have here."

"But you were hiding yourself away just like Edward."

"I wasn't hiding, Alice, I was… protecting myself."

"You were in denial about everything."

"And I've worked through that now, thanks to Edward. I would thank you for sending him my way but, then again, your little trick put my life and his sanity at risk."

"Edward has impeccable control. I knew it would turn out well because I saw it. What I didn't see was you both staying here." She turned about the room.

"Ah, but that's the beauty of the society in which we all now live, isn't it?" I said, feeling a surge in my determination to stand my ground. "When Edward changed me, there was no need to fake my death and move away, no need to pretend to be something I am not or to live a life of lies and deceit.

"I got to keep my friends, my home and my job. And now, whenever the store is closed, I might still write at my kitchen table but I can also run through the forest, swim in the sea and wrap myself around your brother until he has me–"

"I'm opening up a new branch of Rent-a-Vampire in Seattle," Alice said curtly. "I'd like for you both to come and work for me."

"No way is your brother going on dates with anyone but me! You wouldn't hire your husband out so why ask it of my mate?"

"I wouldn't hire my husband out _to you_ , but others? That's a different story. After all these years, it does put a certain sparkle back into the old sex life, doesn't it, Jasper?"

We all turned to face the blond-haired vampire, but he'd deserted his post on the battered leather armchair and was standing by a bookcase holding a small faded-green volume of love poems.

"What a bizarre coincidence," he said, turning the book around to show us the ex libris label on the inside cover. "May I purchase this book, Miss Bella? It would appear it once belonged to Esme."

Alice and Jasper left soon after that with the book of love poems wrapped up in brown paper, but the following Monday, the bookstore being closed, they arrived on the doorstep of our apartment with two more members of Edward's family.

I could only presume Alice was hoping to strong-arm us into doing her bidding.

With both Jasper and Emmett taking seats on the sofa, Edward brought over the kitchen chairs for his sisters while I shifted the blanket chest to the side for us to sit on.

For his brothers' amusement, Edward produced the Rent-A-Vampire brochure. Rosalie immediately crossed the room, perched on the arm of the sofa beside her mate and leaned in to look at it.

"Did you pick me first, Bella?" Emmett said, showing off his dimples and batting his eyelashes. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"I did," I said, watching as he less than subtly fist-pumped the air, "but I hadn't seen Edward's photo at that point."

"You didn't want Edward when you did," Alice said.

"Only because he looked so miserable. Couldn't you have shown me a photo where he was smiling?"

"There aren't any," Rosalie said.

"Please tell me you picked Jasper last," Emmett said, nudging his brother.

"Technically, I was last, Emmett," Edward said, saving me from further embarrassment. "And that's how it's going to stay."

I looked over at Alice. She had a knowing smile on her face.

"Would you like to see the latest edition?" she said, reaching down into her purse to pull out a glossy brochure similar to the one in Emmett's hands.

She handed it to Edward and he opened it to the first page. "There see, Bella, I'm smiling."

"Yes, you are, sort of. Oh, look at your dad!"

"It's not happening, Alice," he said.

"But I've seen it!" she shouted. "You know I have."

"You're wasting your time." Edward stood up and dropped the open brochure into my lap. "You've already got what you wanted. I'm participating in modern society, interacting with humans and other supernatural creatures. Can't you just be happy for me and let me be?"

"What other supernatural creatures?" Emmett asked.

"Our landlady downstairs is a ghost," I said, flipping the page to see his dimpled face beaming back at me.

"This wasn't how I saw it," Alice said, standing in front of Edward. "You were supposed to rescue Bella–"

"He did that on numerous occasions," I said, leaning around him to see her, "and in a multitude of ways."

He turned his head. "You rescued me too."

"I did?"

"Oh yes."

"But you've got the happy ending all wrong!" Alice stamped her foot. "You were supposed to whisk the girl back to the castle for a life of designer clothes and shoes and glamorous parties. She was supposed to become a princess, not a–"

"Alice," I said quietly, standing up beside my mate, "I don't believe in fairy tale happy endings."

Her eyes narrowed. "It wasn't so long ago you didn't believe in vampires, werewolves and ghosts."

"I wanted the fairy tale ending," Rosalie said, "but my handsome prince turned out to be a vile monster."

I looked at Emmett, confused.

"And then you found me," he said, grinning at her, "didn't you, Rosie?"

"And it's been downhill all the way ever since," Jasper said, abruptly standing and walking over to the window, more than likely to escape the left hook from his brother's fist.

"Fairy tale endings are just a point in time," I said. "They are a moment of blissful happiness, a fade to black before the prince gets horribly drunk and takes the girl's virginity in his four poster bed, assuming she hasn't already lost it to the Wolf, or the Huntsman or a short man with a penchant for mining diamonds."

"Or Buttons," Edward said with a tad more sarcasm than was necessary. I knew who he meant.

"And then it's downhill all the way," Jasper said behind us.

"Thank you, Jasper," Alice said. "You're not helping."

"I am, just not you. They're happy as they are, Alice. You got them together. Now leave them be."

I sighed. "Alice, I was sleepwalking through my life for seven years, not realising it wasn't normal. I've only just woken up and started living again. Why would I want an ending now, happy or otherwise? I don't need every loose end tied neatly in a pretty bow. I want to leave some ends dangling, or tie on new threads, new beginnings, and weave my way forward."

"With me?" Edward brushed the back of his hand against mine.

I grinned. "That goes without saying, Edward."

"It's always nice to hear it, though."

I wrapped my arms around his waist and squeezed him.

"Bella," Rosalie said, "Emmett and I would like to stay and get know you. Do you think your landlady would mind if we used a room downstairs for a few days?" She looked around the apartment. "There's not a lot of space up here."

"Alistair is at home," I said, "so I think they're kind of busy."

"He's one of us," Edward said, "an old acquaintance of Carlisle's."

Emmett frowned. "How does that work – a ghost and a vampire?"

"There is more substance to her than you'd think." I laughed.

"They watch each other," Edward said.

"What?" I looked up at him, eyes open wide.

His mouth curved up on one side. "They touch themselves and watch each other."

"Oh. Oh! Can we try that?"

"I'd like to see how long you'd last before you're all over me."

"It's the thrift store clothing. It does something to me – especially after you've let a mountain lion customise it for you."

"Bella, your eyes are very dark. You need to hunt."

"She's not a newborn anymore," Alice said, but Edward wasn't listening.

He grabbed my hand and started pulling me toward the closet. "Put on your red velvet cloak, Little Red Riding Bella. It's time to go into the forest."


	32. Treat or trick?

**32\. Treat or trick?**

It had been a few days since I'd started the outline for my new story. I'd been distracted when I'd saved the document and had possibly mistyped the name or selected the wrong folder for it to live in because I couldn't find it anywhere.

Opening yet another folder, I scrolled down, looking for the date. There were countless half-baked ideas stored in that particular folder – notes on characters, disjointed scenes and lines of speech – all of which might one day come into play.

My eyes alighted on a three-year-old document that I had no recollection of creating. It became clear it wasn't mine the moment I opened it.

It was only a short piece and yet, as I recalled, he'd been typing for quite a while.

How many words had he written and deleted before he'd deemed it finished? What thoughts and feelings had he chosen not to share?

.

 _Bella,_

 _If you have found this and I have gone, know that I love you. Know I would come back should you ever need me. Know that I would stay should you want me to. Know that I would make you mine forever should you wish for it._

 _If you have found this and I am with you still, then you know I love you. If I have made you mine forever, it is because you wished for it, because you love me back._

 _I would like a life with you like this, sitting opposite you at your kitchen table as you write memories of your father in the notebook Carlisle retrieved from my father's study, using the pen he stole from my mother's bureau._

 _Would you like to add one more memory to your own?_

 _We had a conversation that day, your father and I, part silent, part spoken. Perhaps you heard some of it._

 _He knew what I was straightaway and asked if you knew too. I replied that you did but would not accept it. I fear you never will._

 _He told me where to find his gravestone and asked if I would take care of you. I said I would if you would let me, but whether you let me or not, whether you know it or not, I will always be here for you._

 _He asked if I loved you, but I could not answer him out loud. I could not risk you overhearing me for your rejection would have surely broken my heart then just as it would today._

 _Your father was not afraid of what you might become if you chose an eternity with me; he only wished for you to live a long and happy life._

 _That is all I wish for too, Bella. If you have not done so already, please make my wish come true._

 _Edward_

 _._

I wiped a finger under each eye, closed the laptop down and pushed back my chair. I walked over to my closet and changed into my emerald green wrap dress and knee length boots. Then I wrapped my red velvet cloak around my shoulders, picked up my purse and left my apartment.

As I drove my truck across town to the offices of the Daily News, I passed several groups of accompanied children dressed in elaborate costumes – a variety of fairy tale princesses, a witch, a wolf, a girl in a red hooded cape, a huntsman with an axe, a brother and sister trailing breadcrumbs behind them, and a tall, lanky boy with his hair slicked back, wearing a long, black cloak.

Each child carried either a plastic bucket, a woven basket or a canvas bag in their hand, excited and hopeful that it would be filled to overflowing with candy before they had to make their way back home to bed.

Shrieks of excitement filled the air as I slowed my truck and parked in front of the Daily News office building.

Leaving my cloak with the girl at reception, I walked up the stairs and turned left as instructed on the invitation.

The first thing I spotted through the glass wall of the conference room was the huge banner covering the end wall. Set against a black background, an arc of gold lettering curved up and over the image of an orange pumpkin lantern, its wide grin displaying its pointed fangs.

Reading the letter on my laptop had made me arrive a little later than I'd intended. The room was already full of people and, with the heating on, it seemed as if I could smell every single one of them.

I turned my head toward the stairs, inhaled the last lungful of reasonably fresh air I was going to get for a while and then strode into the room.

"Congratulations, Bella!" Angela said, handing me a glass of champagne. "I told you you just had to change your game and look, you have an international bestseller on your hands."

"I had to change more than my game, Angela."

Arms wrapped around my belly from behind. "You shouldn't be drinking that, Bella," Ben said, resting his chin on my shoulder.

Angela looked over the top of her glasses at her husband. "Where are the kids?"

"Their uncle has them."

With my glass of champagne in hand and Angela and her camera in tow, I worked the room, talking to the various guests about my novel. Angela took photograph upon photograph, although only a select few would be likely to make it into the newspaper.

"So," Mike said, slipping an arm around my waist and kissing me on the cheek, "when is the sequel due out?"

I laughed. "It will be a while, I should think. I have to write it first and the idea I have is for more of a companion story than a follow-on."

"An alternative point of view?"

"Ah, that would be telling."

"I'm afraid Jacob's here," he said, pulling a face.

I glared at Angela. "Who invited him?"

She raised her hands in defence, her camera dropping to hang on its strap around her neck. "Nothing to do with me, but I expect my boss had invitations sent out to all the local businesses. No doubt Eric has his work cut out tonight, trying to sell them all advertising space."

Mike laughed and gave me a gentle squeeze. "And there was me thinking my invitation was personal." He knew it was. I'd handed it to him myself.

Angela sighed. "I'll go see if I can put the dog out before he does something offensive on the carpet."

Mike gave me another squeeze before he let me go and I turned to greet the woman that had come up beside me. As we shook hands, I noticed a tall, bronze-haired man leaning against the far wall. He had a scowl on his face.

"Please excuse me," I said to the woman. "I'll be right back."

As I worked my way through the crowd toward him, the man's face softened until it displayed the most enticing smile.

"You do know you can't drink that champagne, don't you?" he said.

"Holding it makes me feel… normal. Where are the kids?"

"With Ben," he said.

"So, you came." The room was packed so he was no doubt hating every second spent in it. I wasn't overly comfortable myself.

"I said I would come if you wished me to," he said.

"I never told you my wish because, as you once so rightly pointed out, that's a surefire way to guarantee the wish won't come true."

He frowned. "How much longer do I have to wait for you?"

"Another hour, I'd say." I winked and stepped as close as I could considering the company we were in, but he reached out and pulled my body flush against his.

And then he leaned down and kissed me.

I was vaguely aware of my glass being removed from my hand and a camera flash going off to my right. So long as I got a framed copy, I did not care one jot if that photograph was splashed across the front page. The whole world knew already that I was in love with Edward Cullen.

And when he let me go, I looked up into his smiling face and answered his unspoken wish with a yes.

* * *

 **Author's Note**

If I've left you sitting bewildered atop a pile of mattresses and a dried pea, please feel free to ask questions. I'll do my best to answer them.

To all of you: I cannot thank you enough for joining me as I've spun this yarn. Your response has overwhelmed me.

Thanks again to those who have left reviews – I've loved talking to you – and to those who have recommended this story to others.

Thank you to my daughter for being a (sometimes reluctant) sounding-board and to my dear friends within the fandom (you know who you are) for (often unwittingly) inspiring or supporting me throughout the writing and posting process.

And finally… Belle, this one was for you. xx


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